Vegetable Juice
by fukuji mihoko
Summary: As Barnaby struggles with his feelings for Kotetsu, Kotetsu struggles with... eating his vegetables? A story about the woes of grocery shopping, famous popstars, blossoming romance and- of course- vegetable juice! :Barnaby/Kotetsu, sugary sweet fluff XD:
1. Popipo

**Vegetable Juice  
><strong>o1: 'Popipo'

* * *

><p>"<em>Hi, guys!~ It's Miku-Miku here, telling you that you should <em>always_ remember to eat your five a day so you end up an adorable idol girl like me!~ Ehhh, what's that? You don't like vegetables? Shame on you- I'll punish you! Teehee, just kidding~ Miku-Miku would never do that! For people who don't like veggies _vegetable juice _is perfect; it blends all that icky stuff green stuff together so you don't even have to taste it!~ Go buy some _vegetable juice _today- RIGHT now- or Miku-Miku will cry! Do you want me to cry? If you make me cry I'll absolutely never forgive you, so make sure to buy lots and lots of _vegetable juice_, okay? Miku-Miku's counting on you, nihi! … … U-um, did I do that right?"_

Barnaby sighed, brushing his hair out of his eyes. Above him, all around him, the numerous LCD screens set into the tall buildings showed the same image- namely, that irritatingly loud, bubbly, up-and-coming idol with the long green hair tied back in two pigtails.

As per usual, she was trying to sell him things.

If there was one thing Barnaby disliked more than mindlessly cheerful young idols who wailed about love and pain and _misery _they had doubtlessly never experienced, it was cheerful young idols that sung about all that stuff and _then _tried to sell him things.

Wasn't that just a little bit despicable? All of Miku's music videos (yeah, all two of them) involved such a gratuitous amount of product placement it was a wonder the 'adorable' Miku-Miku could even be seen at all amidst the oh-so-subtle sea _stuff_.

Was it really necessary she did adverts, too?

And how in the hell, all minor complaints Barnaby had about Miku-Miku aside, had she so become so ludicrously popular over such a short space of time? It was _unnatural,_ almost like the spread of some deadly disease!

Coverage of Miku-Miku and her long green hair and her schoolgirl's attire was even beginning to seep into Hero TV broadcasts, to Agnes' obvious despair.

Agnes might have been the only person who disliked Miku-Miku as much as Barnaby, because everybody else seemed to love her.

What a joke.

"Hey, Bunny...? What's wrong?"

A light hearted voice, and the equally light grip on his shoulder that accompanied it, was enough to rouse Barnaby from his strange stupor. Barnaby would have known that voice anywhere; not to mention that wide smile, or that stupid beard.

Even if he hadn't recognized the face or voice (unlikely), then he would have recognized the nickname.

Kotetsu was the only person who called him that.

Actually, Kotetsu was the only person _able _to call him that. If anybody else had tried, Barnaby probably would have kicked them. W-well, maybe not (that wouldn't gel well with his 'savior of the people!' image), but he'd sure as hell _imagine_ he was kicking them, which amounted to the same thing, only there was less bad PR.

Barnaby would never imagine kicking Kotestu, though.

At least… not anymore.

Not when Kotestu was so inordinately skilled at getting his_ own_ ass handed to him every other day.

Forget the million power; _that _was his real superhero skill.

Baranaby tried to suppress a smile at seeing Kotetsu. Why should running into him in the street make him so happy?

It didn't make sense.

"It's nice to see you, Kotetsu," Barnaby replied, face impassive.

Kotetsu pouted. "Hey, that's a pretty frosty greeting for your partner, Bunny~ I feel so _hurt_."

Barnaby felt himself flush slightly.

T-that pout was completely unfair; always able to render him speechless for a few seconds- which was a few seconds _far_ too much!

S-stupid old man…

"We're in public, you know," said Barnaby, voice calm. "Being too familiar with me would only draw people's attention. Do you want your cover to be blown, old man?"

"Ahaha, I guess that's a pretty good point…"

"Of course it is. Now, if you'll excuse me-"

"I was just a little worried about you, that's all- but if you don't want this 'old man's' concern I suppose that's fine, too… I don't mind, so you can go if you don't want my cover to be blown by these masses and _masses_ of people, ahaha~"

The latter part was sarcasm, of course- though very light-hearted. It was dark, and the street was virtually empty. That lead Barnaby to question what, exactly, Kotetsu was doing outside (the crueller side of his brain muttering something like 'it's too late for an old man to be out by himself at this time'), but the bag of shopping Kotetsu was holding answered for itself.

Kotetsu was smiling widely, sincerely, as usual.

He was… worried about him…?

Well, Kotetsu worried about _everyone_. Barnaby wasn't surprised to see such concern in his face- but it still made him feel a little… funny, all the same.

He couldn't remember the last time somebody other than Kotetsu looked at him like that, or made him feel so… wanted?

Gah; what nonsense. Now _that _was truly embarrassing.

Overhead, Miku-Miku was singing on the LCD screens; her voice filtering through the relatively empty, quiet streets.

"…Bunny? You're doing it again."

"Hn?" Barnaby looked at Kotetsu with slight surprise. "What am I doing?"

"Staring off into space; like you're in your own universe or something. Unless…" Kotetsu grinned. "You're a really big fan of that new idol- um, what is she called? Michiru? Is that it?"

"Miku-Miku."

"Ah, so that's it," said Kotetsu, smiling widely as if he had just solved a vast and complex mystery. "You're a fan of Miku, right?"

"I'm hardly her fan just because I know her name."

"Hey, _I _didn't know what she was called!"

"That's because you're completely hopeless. How can you not know who she is? Her face is plastered to the sides of all the buildings 24/7 is Sternbild."

Kotetsu laughed sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head. "Well, I was never too good names. It sounds like you know a lot about her, though. Would this be…" He leant forwards, prodding Barnaby on the tip of his nose. His bag of shopping hit the floor. Barnaby hoped he hadn't broken anything, but given Kotetsu's clumsy nature that seemed a given. "Young love?"

At the sudden contact, Baranby's face turned pink.

It didn't help that Kotetsu was teasing him about his 'love life' (or lack of thereof, to the immense relief of his legions of female fans) as though it was something to joke about; something that he wasn't even involved in-

Which Kotetsu wasn't.

Not really.

B-but even so…

Barnaby felt a strange rush of sympathy for Blue Rose. Kotetsu really _was_ oblivious.

"Young love? Hardly," said Barnaby, voice cold, as he pushed Kotetsu away from him. "Quite the contrary. I dislike Miss Miku-Miku greatly."

"Eh?" Kotetsu's face fell. "But… you were staring at her for such a long time I just assumed… Damn it; and I thought my reasoning was spot on this time!"

"I was staring at her to discover why, exactly, she is so popular. I wanted to know what others see in her, but it has eluded me."

"Well, I think she's pretty cute."

"Excuse me?"

"Yeah; she's definitely cute. Isn't that popular nowadays? I mean, look at Blue Rose!"

Barnaby's eyes narrowed slightly. Jealousy began to rise within him; a strange feeling that he knew was completely ridiculous, but he could not help it.

"You think she's cute…?"

"I already said that, didn't I? You really should learn to listen, Bunny! Oh!" Kotetsu's eyes lit up. "And maybe you could follow my lead! You always say such harsh things to people, Bunny; it's so uncute."

Barnaby looked down at the floor.

What did he care if Kotetsu thought he was 'uncute' or not? Kotetsu was hardly the one to judge.

"Look, just a word of advice, Bunny," said Kotetsu, resting a hand on Barnaby's shoulder. "People generally don't like it when you insult them like that, hahaha~ You'll never get a pretty girl if you hide your feelings like that."

Barnaby's breath caught in his chest as Kotetsu's fingers brushed his arm. His skin prickled slightly, as though it was being laced through slowly with pins.

Kotetsu really was… an _idiot._

And yet… he was an idiot who always managed to cheer Barnaby up, regardless of the situation.

Barnaby opened his mouth (most likely to say something disparaging; he hadn't quite decided what), but Kotetsu cut him off, his smile crinkling the corners of his eyes.

"It's fine; there's no need to thank me. It was just a bit of information I've picked up over the years!"

Barnaby sighed- though he couldn't stop the slight, tremulous feeling fluttering, unbidden, in his chest.

"I wasn't going to thank you, old man. The day I take advice from you about my love life is the day I decide to commit social suicide. Slowly. And painfully."

And with that, Barnaby shook Kotetsu off him and walked off.

But he couldn't squash down his small, secret smile.

Miku-Miku's voice trailed after Barnaby throughout his entire walk home.

"_U-um, did I do that right?"_

* * *

><p><strong>an: **Hauuu this was originally going to be a super short series of super short drabbles about Kotetsu & Barnaby using meme music as a base for each drabble but then it got really longggg (like longer than 400 words 'long' XD) so I don't think my original idea will hold up : But all the chapters will still be based on memesic so it's okay, it'll just have a /slightly/ (and I say 'slightly', not 'fully' XDD) more coherent storyline :3

Everybody knows popipo right? :3  
>http :  / www . youtube . com / watch?v=T0-2lzA7_Cg

I think Miku would be pretty in place in the Tiger & Bunny verse XD; I mean, she has a pretty futuristic design XD; And all dat hair.

**~renahhchen xoxoxo**


	2. Caramelldansen

**Vegetable Juice  
><strong>o2: 'Caramelldansen'

* * *

><p>"Urgh, I can't believe this; I seriously can't believe this! Is this some kind of joke?"<p>

"Hn? What's wrong, Blue Rose?"

Karina ignored Kotetsu completely.

"Useless, useless! They expect me to lower myself to such a level? Ha! I'd rather **die **first; I'd rather quit being a hero! I'm a professional _idol_, a professional _hero_, not a performing sea lion! What'll they ask me to do next, balance a beach ball on my nose? Arghhhhh, it pisses me off so much!"

Kotetsu turned to look at his fellow heroes in surprise. The others, however, did not appear nearly as surprised as he was. Nathan was trying to suppress some rather obvious laughter. Keith was smiling at Karina as one would indulgently look at a small child having a temper tantrum. Pao-Lin was wearing a pair of ear buds to drown out Karina's voice, lying on the floor as she idly flipped through a magazine.

"Hey," said Pao-Lin presently, popping one of the buds out of her ears, "has our oh-so-incredible star idol shut up yet?"

Karina's head whipped around. "I heard that, you little brat!"

"K-kyahh! I-I guess you're still angry after all!" Pao-Lin laughed nervously, holding her magazine before her face as some kind of shield. "Don't kill me, oh Miss Master Idol!"

Karina's left eye twitched. "S-shut up! Shut up, shut up, shut up!"

By this point, Nathan could no longer suppress his laughter. To Karina's immense indignation, he burst into a peal of giggles- and Pao-Lin joined in, still shielding herself behind her magazine.

"Hey, I'm beginning to feel a little out of the loop here," said Kotetsu, looking around in confusion. "What's wrong with Blue Rose?"

"Aww~" Pao-Lin said through her giggles, "didn't they tell you, Kotetsu? Ahh- but I guess it's only natural Karina wouldn't say anything even though she was complaining about it to everyone else!~ Hehehe~"

Karina's face turned bright red.

"Now, now, Dragon Kid," said Nathan, "don't tease the old man!"

"Y-you're just as old as him, you know!" snapped Karina. "And I'd thank you to keep out of my business! Humph!"

"Eh…?" Kotetsu, still completely confused by this strange scene (confusion was almost his natural state), turned to look at Barnaby for some clarification. "Do you know what's going on, Bunny? Is there something I can do to help?"

"I'm not sure about that," said Barnaby, smiling. "This is a personal issue involving Blue Rose. I'm afraid she'll have to swallow her pride for a few moments and tell you herself."

"Is that so…?"

Karina folded her arms, eyes narrowed. "No way! There's definitely no way I'd tell _you_!"

"But you have told all of us. Multiple times, in face," said Ivan quietly. He looked a little afraid to make his point- but, luckily, Pao-Lin hurried to detract all attention from him with another round of giggles.

"I'm afraid you'll have to tell Kotetsu at some point, given this involves him as well," said Barnaby, eyes narrowing as he looked at the red-faced Karina. "It would be highly irresponsible if you didn't."

Karina shivered at Barnaby's words; icy cold despite their polite tone. It felt a little like she was being scolded by her dad- but her dad was never as scary as that!

The young girl looked between Kotetsu and Barnaby, her face growing redder and redder before, finally-

"Fine!" She slammed her foot on the floor defiantly, folding her arms. "I-I'll tell you! But I don't know why Lloyds couldn't tell you himself!"

"Because he wants to make you suffer?" Pao-Lin suggested oh-so-innocently.

"You shut up!" Karina snapped. "W-well, anyway, um… A-ahh, it's really embarrassing! Geez… U-um, well… The company wants us- that is, me and you and Barnaby- to shoot a commercial together. There." Karina narrowed her eyes. "Happy now?"

"That doesn't sound too bad," said Kotetsu, scratching the side of his cheek absently. He grinned. "Unless you're embarrassed about working with somebody like me, Blue Rose? I'll let you know, I'm still pretty cool for an old guy! I won't let you down!"

Karina's cheeks grew so red Barnaby found himself musing if it was possible to fry eggs on them. The more childish side of his personality thought that would be an interesting experiment- but he decided against it.

He had nothing against Karina. Her crush on Kotetsu was so obvious she might as well have worn a sandwich board with her feelings written on it in neon flashing lights, but Kotetsu was oblivious enough not to notice, and Barnaby doubted it would go anywhere anyway. Not when Kotetsu seemed to regard Karina as another daughter; a Keade away from home.

Kotetsu was not in love with Karina.

The biggest worry was that Barnaby had put so much thought into that analysis. Did Kotetsu mean so much to him that he had started to view the older man's friends and colleagues as potential threats?

That was petty; a complete waste of time. He was a _hero_, not a love struck, jealous girl from a TV sit com (not that Barnaby had ever watched any of those- not even when he was feeling a little low and wanted something light-hearted to cheer him up; of course not!).

Barnaby knew he couldn't afford to become so distracted by Kotetsu. It was stupid, anyway. Ridiculous.

He was being ridiculous.

He was even jealous of that stupid Vegetable Juice girl on the billboards because Kotetsu had called her cute _once_. Well, twice, but who was counting?

Certainly not Barnaby.

Or, at least, he wished he wasn't.

Thinking about the situation too much made Barnaby feel just a _little _bit helpless and pathetic; two states of mind he didn't wish to associate himself with. It was best to try and ignore it, rather than questioning his rapidly deteriorating sanity. Doing the latter would only depress him, and then he would have to watch more trashy TV sit coms to feel a little better-

N-not that he did that… really.

"U-um, well, you see…" Karina pursed her lips, prodding the tips of her fingers together as she looked at the floor. Her sudden abashed, embarrassed nature was completely different to her wild fury from before. The change was noted enough for even Kotatsu to notice.

"Hey, Blue Rose? What… exactly is this advert for?"

"Some anime company. I forget which one. Does it matter?" asked Karina, shrugging carelessly.

Kotetsu smiled brightly at this. "Anime? That's the stuff I used to watch with Kaede when she was a little kid; I know what that is! I was worried it'd be for some new electric gadget or something that I'd know nothing about, haha! That's a relief!"

Barnaby couldn't suppress a smile. "You're letting your age show, old man."

"Hey, what are you talking about?" Kotetsu pouted. "There are so many technological breakthroughs nowadays I just can't keep up- it's not my fault!"

"Of course it's not. It's only natural you'd get slow with age."

"It has nothing to do with age; scientists just work wayyy too damn hard! It's like they_ want_ to confuse everybody!"

"No. You're the only one who's confused." Barnaby smirked. "If everybody was as incompetent as you humanity still wouldn't have invented the wheel."

"T-that's too mean, Bunny!"

Pao-Lin and Nathan began to laugh once more, falling against one another for support.

"Haha, yeahh~ Do you remember that time he couldn't figure out how to lock the keypad of his cell phone and he called the police four times in a row?" asked Pao-Lin, giggling helplessly as she clutched her sides.

"N-ngh…" Kotetsu made a slightly strangled sound akin to a cat being stepped on.

"I… did not know about that," said Barnaby, raising his brows. "When did that happen?"

Kotetsu flushed slightly in apparent embarrassment. "That was just after I bought the damn thing! I can use it properly now; I don't see what the big deal is, honestly…"

"Yes- and from what I remember, you had to buy a new cell phone because you dropped your old one in the fish tank, didn't you?" said Ivan carelessly, smiling slightly.

"We have fish in this building?"

"Well, not anymore, Handsome."

"Yep!~ That old man managed to fry them better than my powers ever could, hahaha!~"

"H-hey, I think you're being a little unfair to Kotetsu…" said Keith- though it was obvious by his smile he found Kotetsu's inadvertent mass fish murder amusing, too.

Karina managed to surprise everybody by shouting, eyes narrowed and fists clenched, "That's right! Back off, okay? You shouldn't laugh at somebody just because they're not very good at something!"

Pao-Lin and Nathan sobered up rather quickly; perhaps out of fear Karina would lodge an icicle through them.

"A-anyway, I didn't tell you the worst part about the advert yet!" said Karina, trying to bring the conversation back to its original point. "W-we… we… W-we have to dance!"

Karina's 'bombshell' of a reveal was met with silence.

Then, Kotetsu said- still noticeably flustered from the light-hearted teasing of the others- "Dancing? Ha; don't worry about that, Blue Rose! I'm pretty spry for my age, you know!"

Nathan raised a brow. "Oh realllyyy?~ Would you like me to test that?"

"A-ah, that's very kind, but no thank you!"

Pao-Lin began to giggle again- and Barnaby had to admit, Kotetsu's obvious embarrassment really was… incredibly endearing…

Damn it.

Everything about him was endearing.

There was only one explanation for it.

Barnaby had gone insane. Either that, or somebody was controlling his mind just for kicks, because he would never find a person so stupidly oblivious and yet strangely sweet _endearing_- certainly not…

Gah.

The denial was getting him nowhere, really, apart from giving him a headache.

"The dancing isn't a big problem- I'll sure you'll suit it just fine, Kotetsu" said Blue Rose, her voice cutting. "The dance isn't difficult or anything- and **that's **why I'm so angry! Ahh, it pisses me off so much!"

"Wait, hold on a second," said Kotetsu, confused (big surprise) once more, as he held up his hands. "You're angry because the dance is too easy?"

"Way, way too easy! I could do it my sleep! I-if I do such a stupidly easy, embarrassing dance on an advert that'll be seen by millions of people my reputation will be _**ruined**_!" Karina cried, grabbing a handful of her blonde hair in irritation.

"My, my~" said Nathan, standing behind Kotetsu as he whispered into his ear. "She's quite the drama queen, isn't she?"

"You're one to talk! W-well, I guess it'd be fine for you if you had to do an ad like this 'cause you don't HAVE a reputation to butcher in the first place!"

"Ahaha… That was cold, Karinaaa!" Nathan cried, placing a hand to his chest as though he'd just been shot. "Now I can see why everybody calls you the _Dangerous Ice Queen_!"

"…Do people call me that?"

"They should."

"Urgh! I don't have time for this!" Karina shouted, marching away angrily. "I'm going to go and complain, and then-"

"Hey, hey, wait up, Blue Rose!"

"H-huh?" Karina turned around, staring at Kotetsu. "What do you want?"

"Well, ahaha…" Kotetsu smiled. "It seems a shame for you to complain now when I haven't seen the dance yet. Don't worry about looking silly; I'm sure you'd look cute no matter what you did!"

Karina's face turned pink. She looked at the floor, scuffing her shoes against the ground.

"I-I, well, I… I-it's really stupid, okay? So stupid even you could get it right first go, and not even be a beat off!"

"Wow… Such a dance is possible?" Kotetsu smiled. "But, never mind, never mind; I'm intrigued! Will you show me?"

"W-well, I…"

"Pretty please?"

"Argh! Fine!" said Karina angrily- though it was obvious to everyone (apart from Kotetsu) that behind those narrowed eyes lurked emotions that were far, far softer than her icy façade let on.

And with that, Karina held her hands up before her head to imitate rabbit ears, and began to swing her hips.

Her face was flushed the whole time.

"T-there," said Karina, suddenly stopping after a few seconds of abject humiliation. "That's it. That's the whole dance. Stupid, it's stupid- d-don't say anything, it's-"

"Really good!"

Karina's eyes widened. "_Huh_?"

"Yep," said Kotetsu, grinning, as he gave Karina an enthusiastic thumbs up, "I think even I could master that pretty easily- though I truly would look ridiculous, haha~ You don't need to worry about being out staged at all!"

Barnaby smiled softly as he watched Karina stutter helplessly. Kotetsu's words were purely fatherly; an attempt to cheer Karina up- but it was obvious he didn't realize just how deeply Karina was taking them to heart. Kotetsu really was stupid.

He wasn't the only stupid one, though.

* * *

><p>"It was… nice, what you did back there."<p>

"Nice?" asked Kotetsu, turning to look at Barnaby with one of his usual smiles. "I don't know what you mean; I was just telling the truth."

Barnaby and Kotetsu were stood outside on one of the many (mostly pointless) balconies of the Hero TV headquarters. The sun was beginning to go down, turning the sky a mixture of orange and red, and there was a light breeze. The advert (which Karina had been so adverse to beforehand) had already been shot, for it was incredibly simple and required little time to set up.

Miracle of miracles, Karina hadn't been loudly lamenting her failed career or her desire to wear a paper bag on her head forever and ever when she left the building. Instead, she'd just looked… happy. A little confused, perhaps, but happy all the same.

Kotetsu just had that kind of effect on people.

"Yes, but you certainly calmed Blue Rose down. I doubt anybody else could have done that."

"Ah, it was no big deal. I have a kid; I'm used to dealing with things like that," said Kotetsu, grinning. "Well, I guess I've been a little out of practise these past few years, but at least my powers haven't gone to waste."

"Is that what you see Blue Rose as, then? A child?" asked Barnaby, unable to hold back the question. Curiosity was beginning to bite at him terribly; a curiosity fuelled by jealousy, and- though he tried to push the thought from his mind- a fear somebody else would command Kotetsu's attention more than he did. Barnaby tried to disguise it with a half-smile that was probably more suspicious than if he hadn't bothered. "Blue Rose would hate it if you thought that about her."

"I can imagine. I don't see her as a child," said Kotetsu, after a small pause. "Not at all! But still… I see her as somebody I'd like to protect, I suppose… I mean, I don't want to see her unhappy- and I know girls of her age can be pretty self-conscious, so I thought I'd try to make her feel a little better."

"I was wondering if you'd start complaining about the advert with Blue Rose. I know you hate doing stuff like that too."

"Well, yeah, but I know Blue Rose likes doing promotional stuff like that- so I thought, why not?" Kotetsu smiled, shrugging. "It's no big deal."

"Ha… You really do want to protect everyone, huh?"

"Guilty as charged! But, yeah. I guess that's how it is. Mm." Kotetsu grinned. "Like, I want to protect you too, Lil' Bunny~"

Barnaby winced slightly at the nickname- though he couldn't ignore the faint tremor when Kotetsu said that so casually.

"Don't call me that."

"But you looked like a little bunny when you danced and everything!~ Don't be a spoilsport!"

"Alright, alright. But, honestly… you talk about 'protecting' people, but you're more childish than all of us here."

"Well, you have to some fun in life, Bunny!~"

"Fun?" Barnaby raised a brow. He smirked. "Like electrocuting a full tank of fish? Is that your idea of 'fun'?"

Kotetsu's smile, which before had been so bright, wavered slightly, as his face turned pink.

"Not you too, Bunny! I thought you were meant to be my partner!" He pouted. "Everybody's been bullying me today- but if you join in I don't think I'll be able to stand it!"

Barnaby laughed. He reached forwards and, deftly, pulled the brim of Kotetsu's hat down over his eyes.

"Then you shouldn't make yourself such an easy target, old man."

"And you should learn to respect your elders!"

"At least I'm not a serial killer like you."

"T-that only happened once; it's not like I've made a habit out of it! Bunny, you're so mean- I think I might cry!"

As Barnaby argued childishly back and forth with Kotetsu, he was struck with a sudden realization- or maybe it wasn't all that sudden at all, and he had always been aware of it deep down.

It had only chosen to surface at this very moment.

He had never had this much fun with anybody else before…

The word 'fun' had not even been in his dictionary after that day on Christmas Eve, all those years ago. He hadn't allowed himself to be cheerful; wouldn't it be disrespectful, to smile and be happy after his parents had died? He had no right…

But now…

Barnaby shivered slightly.

Whenever he saw Kotetsu, he couldn't help but smile.

He really was in over his head.

* * *

><p><strong>an: **838  
>This is so much fun to write. Like for srs XD~<p>

Kotetsu's character is so difficult to pin down thoughhh. There's like a mix of goofiness and maturity which is so agasksksksksk I can't portray it properly –glares- I'm doin' my best though aha XD~

o yeah and the meme for this chapter is…  
>I don't even need to give a link u all know caramelldansen XDD;<p>

**~renahhchen xoxo**


	3. Nyanyanyanyanyanyanya!

Vegetable Juice  
>o3: 'Nyanyanyanyanyanyanya!'<p>

* * *

><p>"E-eh? There must be some kind of mistake here!"<p>

"No. There's no mistake," said Agnes firmly. "_You're _going to be in this photo shoot along with Barnaby."

Kotetsu almost_ whimpered_ at the horrifying look Agnes was giving him. She looked like she wanted to butcher him and plant his limbs in her back garden as 'quirky' ornaments!

Wait…

Did Agnes even have a back garden?

That was something he had to discover, just to ensure the hands-being-used-as-a-substitute-for-gardenias situation (which was _incredibly_ likely, _obviously_) never happened.

Kotetsu liked all his limbs exactly where they were, thank you very much.

Even so, despite his initial fear of Agnes, Kotetsu would not go down without a fight. He was a hero, wasn't he? He wasn't afraid; he would not be defeated by a scary woman wearing a lot of make up!

"Agnes, you know I never do photo shoots or whatever! Posing and looking cute is Bunny's job; I wouldn't want to take that away from him!"

Agnes raised a brow. "You're worried about stealing Barnaby's job? How very noble of you."

"Ahaha, well-"

"But Barnaby is in absolutely no danger of being out staged by you; of that, I can be quite certain."

"H-hey, I'm sure I have a few fans somewhere…"

"The deaf, blind or stupid, perhaps."

"T-that's kind of cruel!"

"The truth is."

"I didn't think for a moment I'd take the spotlight away from Bunny; I just don't want to cut into 'his thing', you know? I'd only get in the way if I was at a photo shoot too! Besides, I might end up breaking the camera lens with my face- you understand, right, Agnes? You're a… reasonable woman… Um…" Kotetsu looked down at the floor sheepishly, scuffing his shoes against the floor. "Sort of…? I think… Ahaha…"

Agnes' lip curled.

Ominously, she began to tap tap tap her fingernails against the very official-looking, very full folder clasped to her chest.

'Fingernails?' Ha! Those things were more like _talons_.

Kotetsu was suddenly, uncomfortably aware that claws like that could easily take out one of his eyes- n-not that he thought Agnes would do something like that, but, still…

Bunny always said it was best to be cautious.

Maybe he shouldn't try and incur her wrath further.

"Your face won't break the camera, but your face _might _get broken by me if you don't listen to what I say," said Agnes airily, flipping strands of bleach-blonde hair behind her shoulder in a dismissive motion.

Damn.

Maybe there really _was_ some credibility to that whole 'Agnes is a demented murderer' theory Kotetsu's brain was beginning to form after all.

"You are Barnaby are a team. That's your big selling factor; the reason why you're so popular."

Huh. That was funny. Kotetsu always assumed they were popular because Bunny was handsome and attractive and everybody adored him, whilst _he_ just hung around in the background being generally unappreciated by everyone.

Since when had that changed?

Agnes continued. "That's why you're going to do this photo shoot together, just like it should be. I'm sure you'll look fine. And if you don't…"

"I may not live to see the morning?"

Agnes smiled. "I'm glad you understand me. Now, follow me. I have your costume ready."

"C-costume?"

Dear God; they weren't going to be modelling swimwear again, were they?

Why was life so cruel?

* * *

><p>When Kotetsu saw Barnaby waiting for him with his arms folded, Kotetsu's eyes widened in surprise.<p>

He opened his mouth. Closed it again. Looked a bit like a fish for a few moments- before, finally, he managed to spit the words out.

"B-bunny! You're… you're… you're a bunny!"

"Your powers of observation never cease to amaze," said Barnaby flippantly, voice icy. "You are a genius."

True to Kotetsu's words, a pair of white rabbit ears was perched atop of Barnaby's head, flopping in front of his eyes in a manner that was equal parts strangely adorable and also one of the most hilarious things Kotetsu had ever seen since Antonio got that weird haircut all those years ago. The fact the rabbit ears were complimented by Barnaby's casual attire and a dormant, yet highly dangerous, glare only made matters worse.

Barnaby was trying so hard to look serious- but those ears were making it pretty much impossible.

Heh. Kotetsu couldn't help but grin a little at that.

Okay.

More than a little.

Try a lot.

Maybe Barnaby had a right to look so pissed off- but that was only making it worse.

It looked like Bunny's embarrassing nickname was beginning to catch on.

"Hey, Bunny, don't pull faces like that. The wind'll change and you'll be stuck like that forever. Then what will all your fans do?" said Kotetsu, voice teasing, as he lightly flicked one of Barnaby's bunny ears.

Ooh- they were really soft!

Actually, that was kind of nice…

"G-get off!" Barnaby snapped, voice stilted, as he slapped Kotetsu's fingers away.

"Ah, sorry, Bunny! I just couldn't help myself; you look so unusually adorable!"

"Don't say things like that! I'm not meant to be 'adorable'," said Barnaby, scowling.

"Alright then. 'Strong and manly'," Kotetsu rectified, a teasing grin still playing across his lips. "Yep. Those are definitely 'strong and manly' rabbit ears right there if ever I've seen them. Good job!"

Barnaby's cheeks turned light pink. "Shut up, old man! It's bad enough your stupid nickname become popular enough to the point where magazines even call me that- but _this _is beyond a joke. This is _ridiculous_. T-they expect me to go to a fashion shoot like this?"

"Hm~ You're beginning to sound a little like Blue Rose, you know. I should've figured you'd be even vainer than her, given how… _poofy _and styled your hair always is," said Kotetsu, laughing, as he playfully ruffed Barnaby's gold curls.

Hey, they were kind of soft too, just like petting a small animal~

Idly, Kotetsu wondered what shampoo Barnaby used. It was kind of funny imagining Barnaby spending hours and hours doing his hair every morning, when Kotetsu just slapped his hat over his head and called it a done job.

Barnaby's face turned red at this unwanted contact. He began to sputter angrily- before, finally, the amazing ability of human language flooded back to him.

"Stop that or you'll mess it up for the photo shoot!"

Kotetsu laughed, though he did relent in the head patting. He didn't want to upset Barnaby too much; not when he already looked so angry/offended about the indignity of having to wear a pair of rabbit ears.

Barnaby was the sort of person who got upset over little things like that, and Kotetsu didn't want to push him too far.

Even if it was fun.

"I don't understand why you're so cheerful," said Barnaby bitterly, trying to adjust his hair; carefully running his hands through it to ensure not a single strand was out of place. "You have to wear something like this, too."

"Who, me?" Kotetsu prodded himself in the chest. "I have to dress up like a bunny?"

"Not quite."

Kotetsu started suddenly at this new voice. He'd been so busy teasing Bunny (the kid needed to learn to laugh at himself just a little; he was always so serious!) he hadn't noticed Agnes coming up behind him.

Barnaby sniggered slightly at Kotetsu's obvious surprise, and Kotetsu stuck his tongue out at him in retaliation.

Barnaby and Agnes rolled their eyes at him in perfect synch.

"Whoa… Have you two been _practising _that or something?" Kotetsu asked, looking between Barnaby and Agnes as he pretended to shiver. "That was _way _to perfect to be a coincidence. I-I'm a little creeped out here…"

Barnaby muttered something that sounded a lot like 'idiot' under his breath, but Kotetsu wasn't the one wearing a pair of (actually, kinda, no, _more_ than 'kinda', _cute_) rabbit ears of his head, so Barnaby's insults didn't have quite the cutting edge he obviously wanted them to have.

"Don't be ridiculous," said Agnes, sighing. "Here. I have your 'costume' for you. Just wear these on your head and you'll all set."

Kotetsu looked at the object Agnes was holding forwards for him to inspect; Barnaby leaning forwards curiously so he could peer over Kotetsu's shoulder.

When Barnaby saw what Kotetsu's 'costume' was, he began to smirk.

Kotetsu, meanwhile, groaned.

"Cat ears?"

"Well, tigers are just big cats. Besides, you're known under the name of 'Tiger and Bunny'- I thought dressing up like respective animal would further show the strength of your partnership during the photo shoot," said Agnes, in a tone of voice that clearly said 'don't question me; I am in charge and I am always right.'

Kotetsu still questioned her anyway, though- merely because he was an idiot like that.

"But cats aren't really… Well…"

"Cats aren't really well what?"

"Um… threatening?"

There was a reason Kotetsu's superhero name wasn't 'Wild Kitty', after all.

Actually…

D-didn't that sound kind of like a porn star's name?

Kotetsu felt himself turn red at that thought.

Oh, great. This just got better and better.

"Well, these aren't making me look very vicious either," said Barnaby, tugging at one of his bunny ears with a pained expression on his face.

"I don't know. Once I took Kaede to a petting zoo and a rabbit bit my finger," said Kotetsu. "Then can be kind of dangerous, too."

"Oh, sure," said Barnaby, glaring. "I think it's obvious who has the worse deal here, old man." A sigh. "If you hadn't given me such a stupid nickname this wouldn't be happening."

"Ahahaha, well… I-I see I might have made a mistake now…"

Kotetsu laughed awkwardly as, tentatively, he picked up the pair of ears from Agnes hands. He looked at them with narrowed eyes.

Then, with the air of a man who was being led up to the chopping block, he placed the stupid ears on his head and struck a pose; hands held up, fingers curled over as though they were paws.

"Meow?"

Doubtless, if that had been a scene from a shojo manga (didn't Karina like to read those; hiding them behind fashion magazines when she thought other people might be watching?), sparkly hearts would, doubtless, have erupted behind Kotetsu at his 'adorkable' (or just plain 'dorky') pose.

Agnes had to stifle her smile.

Barnaby didn't even bother.

"H-hey! I'm doing my best here! Geez, I'm getting too old for this."

Kotetsu pouted a little in a mock show of annoyance, but, to be honest, he didn't care. If destroying his pride was all it took to make Barnaby smile like that, then he'd gladly do it. Kotetsu got the feeling Barnaby hadn't done much smiling in his life.

Kotetsu's reputation didn't mean all that much to him anyways- it was just…

Damn.

It was kind of embarrassing wearing those stupid ears.

What if his mother saw him dressed up like that as she flipped through a magazine- or, worse still, his _brother_? He'd never hear the end of it, honestly. His life wouldn't be worth living.

'Is _this _what heroes do nowadays? Whoa, it's a lot different than I imagined it, brother- but you stick at it!' Snigger, snigger.

That would be his brother's response.

As least Kaede would never have to learn the truth about her kitty-cosplaying dad.

But it was all worth it to see that small, slightly hesitant smile on Barnaby's face.

* * *

><p>"Man, I'm exhausted!" Kotetsu sighed, collapsing on a couch in the main room of the Hero TV building. Who knew standing around doing embarrassing poses whilst wearing a pair of kitty ears on his head would be so tiring?<p>

Barnaby must've had pretty good stamina (not to mention patience) being able to cope with photo shoots like that virtually twenty four seven, in addition to his hero work.

For perhaps the first time in his life, the cameramen had actually shown a vague flicker of interest in Kotetsu, too. It never used to be like that. Whenever Barnaby had been modelling clothes the cameramen were all over him (well, not literally; that would be disturbing and highly inappropriate, given Barnaby often didn't wear a lot when pictures were being taken of him), asking him to pose for more and more shots and, oh, would you mind trying this on- and look at that smile, you're _perfect!_

The cameramen, of course, did not know that underneath the icy smiles Barnaby affected during his photo shoots lurked impatience and irritation- but Barnaby seemed to exist in an almost constant state of irritation all the time, so maybe it didn't make much difference.

During those photo shoots Kotetsu would always be told to stand to one side. He wasn't needed, wasn't necessary- just an accessory to Barnaby who followed him around everywhere, a little like a stray dog. Even though they were a 'team', they hadn't really been treated as such.

Kotetsu had hated- well, not hated, hate was a pretty strong word and it took too much energy to hate anything (apart from maybe, like, broccoli)- Bunny from the moment he saw him; sure he was some arrogant little kid who only cared about his reputation and his perfect hair instead of saving people.

That had been wrong though, hadn't it?

He'd been dead wrong…

Suddenly, a shadow fell across Kotetsu's body.

Barnaby was standing over him, hands on hips.

Had he done something wrong…?

"What on earth are you grinning about?"

Huh? He'd been grinning?

Damn it. Apparently, Kotetsu's face was conspiring against him; making his expression all silly and sappy when he thought about the fond memories he'd shared with Barnaby.

He'd never been the best at hiding his feelings.

"Aha… Nothing, Bunny, nothing!"

"Good. Then get up and let me sit down, too."

"Ehh? But there's another couch; go sit on that," said Kotetsu petulantly, looking up at Barnaby from under his eyelashes.

"I don't care," Barnaby replied, equally as childishly. "I want to sit _here_, not over there. Move."

"And if I said no…?"

"I'd sit on you."

Kotetsu grinned. "A lot of people would consider that a reward rather than some horrible threat. You have a lot of strange fans, Lil' Bunny, ahaha~"

To Kotetsu's amusement, Barnaby's face turned light pink at this. It reminded Kotetsu a little of the time he'd teased Kaede when she tried experimenting with her hairstyle; 'trying to attract some guy, are you? The young grow up so fast!'

Kaede had gone a funny red color, like an overripe tomato, and hung up on him, which had made Kotetsu feel like a bit of a dork, but he figured it was fine. Parents were allowed to say embarrassing things to their kids.

It was practically in the job description.

At least he could live up to _that_ when it came to be a parent, even if he failed spectacularly at everything else.

"W-whatever," said Barnaby, trying to shrug off his embarrassment. "You have three seconds to move, and then I'm sitting on you."

"Ahh, you're being such a spoilt brat, Bunny."

"And you're being a selfish, lazy old man."

"You always respect your elders and betters, or… or something, anyway."

"Yes. I think that only applies to people who actually _are_ your betters."

"That was pretty harsh! Look, don't sit on me, Bunny, I don't think my old bones could handle it!"

"One."

"Ahh, I'd love to move, but you see, I'm really too comfy right here-"

"Two."

"You wouldn't treat your partner so cruelly, would you, Bunny?"

Barnaby smirked as he looked down at Kotetsu, still sprawled in a lazy heap across the couch.

"You really don't know me at all, do you? Three."

And with that, Barnaby flopped down onto the couch with minimum grace or elegance- landing his full weight directly on Kotetsu's stomach.

The noise of pain Kotetsu made was very satisfying.

"O-oof! Ah, Bunny, you're really heavy! You don't look it, but you weigh a ton!"

"Well, _thanks_. You're incredibly charming, too."

"Bunny, get off! Get off get off get off I can't of can't _breathe_!"

"I did give you a warning."

"I didn't think you'd..." Cough, cough. "Actually _do _it!"

Barnaby only smiled. "Yes, well, consider this revenge."

"R-revenge?"

"For making me wear those stupid rabbit ears earlier. You might just've killed my reputation with your inane nickname, old man."

"Aww, c'mon, Bunny! D-don't be such a kid! Y-you're killing me here! I'm _literally _dying!"

_Slam!_

"W-who's killing who? Are you alright?"

The sudden appearance of Ivan in the doorway, his face pale with worry, was enough to make Barnaby push himself off Kotetsu in alarm. In his haste, Barnaby very nearly tripped over his feet (a huge departure from his usual elegant motions), almost face-planting onto the floor.

If Barnaby's nose got broken, his legions upon legions of fans- many of whom wanted Barnaby to sit on them, apparently, according to some strange survey Kotetsu had stumbled across on the haunting planes of the internet- would be pretty pissed off.

Kotetsu couldn't let Barnaby's face be marred!

Luckily, Kotetsu managed to reach forwards and steady Barnaby, grabbing hold of his arm.

Barnaby's many fans all heaved a sigh of relief.

_Un_luckily, this sudden movement only made Barnaby fall over backwards.

The end result was almost cliché, really.

Barnaby fell backwards… directly into Kotetsu's arms.

Yep.

Because their previous poses just hadn't been embarrassing _enough_.

Both Kotetsu and Barnaby turned red from their sudden proximity- and their embarrassment was made all the more pronounced by the wide-eyed look on Ivan's face.

"What… are you doing?" Ivan asked gingerly, looking between Barnaby and Kotetsu in alarm.

Kotetsu spat out a few strands of Barnaby's hair (how had they ended up in his mouth?) and began to speak.

"Bunny was trying to suffocate me. I managed to stop him just in time."

"Oh… So then… you were having a fight?"

"Um, something like that," said Kotetsu, laughing nervously; speaking for both himself and Barnaby, since it was obvious Barnaby had momentarily lost the ability of human speech. "P-pay it no mind, ahaha!"

Well, that was subtle.

And why was he still clinging onto Barnaby like that?

The moment Kotetsu's grip slackened Barnaby fell off the couch and onto the floor- _thump._

Oh.

So that was why he'd been holding onto him so tightly.

Kotetsu hoped Barnaby wasn't going to get bruises or anything, because Barnaby almost certainly blame him for that- 'how dare you mar my perfect skin?'- and then Kotetsu's life wouldn't be worth living for a few days.

"Well, if it was just a fight I guess that's… fine… It's what you do all the time, anyway," said Ivan slowly, biting his lower lip. The poor kid looked a little like he'd stumbled across some kind of satanic ritual. He was completely lost for words. "Although…"

"Although what?" asked Kotetsu, tilting his head to one side.

Ivan gestured at his head vaguely.

"Ears."

"Ears?"

"Cat ears. You're… wearing cat ears… Kotetsu."

"Hn? I am?"

Kotetsu's hands reached up to pat his head.

Then, he froze.

H-how had he not noticed they were still there? Where was his hat?

"_Bunny_," Kotetsu whined, as he glared down at the collapsed form of his colleague, "why didn't you tell me they were still there?"

Barnaby only smirked.

"I thought they suited you, so I didn't say anything."

"B-bunny!"

Meanwhile, Ivan had taken on Kotetsu's usual role of being very confused.

* * *

><p><strong>an: **Nyoron~~  
>Yeah there is a ridiculously large amount of Tiger &amp; Bunny fan art with them dressed up with kittybunny ears respectively, it's kind of adorable :3

I guess you can tell pretty easily thus far that this story was originally gonna be unconnected shorts, given its disjointed-ish nature, but there_ is _kind of sort of an overarching 'story line' that should make itself apparent next chapter… um, I hope… :3

The meme here is:

http : / / www . youtube . com / watch?v=i2pe33dgLzE&feature=related

haha that's not the original miku version though, s'the Tiger & Bunny one I found ;3  
>Everybody knows that meme under a different name now though XD<p>

**~renahhchen xoxo**


	4. Anata ni dakaretai

Vegetable Juice  
>o4: 'Anata ni dakaretai'<p>

* * *

><p>"Are you sure, Ivan? Are you quite sure?"<p>

"U-um... Well…"

"You have to be sure, or that could be a disaster!"

"I-I trust what my eyes saw?"

"But you of all people should know your eyes can't always be counted on!"

"W-what, so you think some random NEXT could be posing as Kotetsu or Barnaby? I'm not sure about that," Ivan muttered, looking at the floor. "I-it seemed like them to me…"

Pao-Lin and Nathan were stood on either side of him, looming over his seated figure, as they stared at him in awe. How on earth had he gotten himself into this situation, anyway? It felt a little like Pao-Lin and Nathan were trying to barbeque him with some NEXT-type laser eye ability given the intensity of their staring. It was a lucky thing neither of them were actually capable of dispensing the indestructible eye beams of death or Ivan would've been fried into a funny burnt twisted thing even worse than the results Kotetsu's so-called 'cooking'.

Ivan had always felt a little lonely about hiding in the shadows; not through personal choice, but from poor social skills and a inferiority complex about, ooh, _this _big, given his other superhero companions could control the elements and all he could manage was really, really good cosplay. However, he was now beginning to appreciate the merits of being left alone.

It wasn't nearly as awkward as _this _was.

The sudden attention he was getting was disconcerting.

Why had he told Pao-Lin about what he'd seen earlier, anyway? He was never one to gossip; the words just slipped from his mouth when Pao-Lin smiled at him and said 'hello', and he panicked and didn't know how to respond (she was so cute…!) and blurted out whatever stupid thing came to his mind first; 'I saw Kotetsu and Barnaby in a rather suggestive pose earlier!'

Somehow, that had now evolved into the Spanish Inquisition, with Pao-Lin and Nathan circling him as they tried to force more information out of him.

Arrghhh- this was a _disaster_!

Stupid.

Why was he so _stupid?_

He'd only wanted to compliment Pao-Lin on how nice her hair looked today. How had it evolved into this?

_Because you have the social skills of a cardboard box in a coma, idiot._

"You _did _see Handsome and Tiger coiled together in the throes of passion, correct?"

Ivan's face turned light pink. "W-well, I wouldn't put it like that exactly. I-I never said that, did I?"

"You implied it," said Nathan, grinning.

"I… I-I really, really didn't mean to!"

"Kihihihihi~"

Pao-Lin laughed a high pitched, rather disturbing laugh which made Ivan's blood turn cold. Had she _always _been so terrifying- or was that just a side effect of the disastrous shopping trip Karina had taken her on a few days ago? Maybe the shock and embarrassment of being forced into numerous frilly, flouncy dresses against her will had broken something inside the young hero.

"I always knew there was something going on between those two," Pao-Lin continued, her voice still frighteningly high-pitched with just a dash of _terrifying_. "It was so _obvious_."

"Well, Tiger isn't the most _subtle_ of people~"

"But to think... They were actually hugging like that! _Squee_!"

Squee? Was that a normal sound? It was a little bit like the noise a hamster made when they were stood on; n-not that Ivan had been standing on any hamsters! He just thought, if somebody _were_ to step on one, it would make a noise like that.

Ivan was beginning to get quite worried for Pao-Lin's health. Maybe the 'squee'ing and demented 'kihihihi's were solid proof some vital part of her young, innocent mind had been fractured beyond repair by an overexposure to pretty dresses.

"It's nice to think Handsome is finally thawing out just a little. It'd be good for Tiger, too. He's been so lonely for so very, very long! I feel _so_ sorry for him! They need each other!"

"Karina might be a little upset when she finds out, though..." mused Pao-Lin, hand under her chin. "I mean, I kind of hate her right now- she kept saying pink's my color I told her pink's **not **my color I don't want to wear that keep it away! ...Ahem."

And then Pao-Lin continued talking as always.

Now Ivan really was worried for her health- and, more importantly, his safety.

"I-I mean, I'm a little annoyed at her, but I don't want her to be seriously upset."

"A woman's heart is a fickle thing," said Nathan, nodding.

"I bet Bunny and the old man_ still_ haven't caught on about their true feelings yet, though, even though they're totally obvious," Pao-Lin grumbled, putting her hands on her hips. "Let's worry about those two dense morons first before we fuss over Karina."

"Too true, Dragon Kid, too true!" Nathan said, ruffling the young girl's head. "I must say, you really _are_ incredibly intuitive!"

"Well, that old man isn't entirely subtle, hehe~"

"So let's work together to ensure Handsome and Tiger get their happy ending, right?"

"Yes! Then damage control with Karina later." Pao-Lin 'kihihihi'ed to herself some more, cracking her knuckles. "I don't really want her to be upset, but it'd be payback for all that... _pink_... she made me wear..." She shuddered. "So much pink... n-no more pink, Karina, no more...! M-my skin is _melting_!"

"There, there. It'll be alright. Do whatever you want to do- don't conform to society's standards; etcetera, etcetera. You're a very, very pretty girl, hatred of pink aside."

"Thank you, Nathan! Alright, let's do our best!"

"Yes!"

And with that, the unlikely pair cemented their alliance by bumping fists with one another.

Ivan swore he could hear thunder and ominous Latin chanting playing in the background.

This could only end in tears.

Suddenly, he felt the need to trail Kotetsu and Barnaby around apologizing profusely, even though nothing had happened...

Yet.

* * *

><p>"Do you see it, Soldier Dragon Kid?"<p>

"Yes, Lieutenant Fire Emblem!" said Pao-Lin, saluting her 'lieutenant' with one hand, whilst her free one proudly pulled Kotetsu's cell phone out of inside of the couch. "I have it right here!"

"Well, _that _was quite the anti-climax," said Nathan disdainfully, pressing a manicured finger against his lower lip. "Tiger should take better care of his things. I'm so disappointed; I must tell him later."

"He h_as_ been pretty busy with ads lately and the like, though.."

"Haven't we all, dear? Aaah- being this popular is a curse! Everybody wants me at the same time- I'm not sure I can please them all!"

"Hehe~ Don't worry, I don't doubt your skills! But let's worry about 'pleasing' Bunny and his could-be boyfriend right now, ufufu~"

"You know, Handsome would kill you if he knew _you'd_ started calling him that, too."

"Well, I can't help it!" said Pao-Lin, smiling, as she idly flipped through the list of Kotetsu's contacts on his cell phone. "His hair is always so cute and fluffy- just like the ears of a rabbit! I always wanted a rabbit. Ooh..." Her eyes lit up. "Do you think, if this plan goes well and everybody ends up happy-"

"Except poor Karina."

"Muu. If she gets _that _upset, I guess I'll play the test subject and let her do my hair and make-up, like she's always begging to," said Pao-Lin, shuddering slightly. "That should cheer her up."

"I could join in and help! I think blues and greens would suit you very well!"

"W-well, let's cross that bridge when we get to it!" said Pao-Lin hurriedly, flushing slightly. "W-well, I was just wondering... If this story has a happy ending, do you think Bunny will let me stroke his hair?"

"Is that your dream?"

"It's my goal in life! Aaah, I bet it'll be really fluffy!"

Nathan watched Pao-Lin with amusement as the pint-sized girl spun round, bangs kept in place by that cute flowery clip. It must've been nice to be a child like her, with such simple dreams.

"You can fantasize about Handsome's lovely hair once we've completed our mission, Soldier Dragon Kid."

"Of course, of course! I'm sorry! I guess I got a little carried away there."

"It's quite understandable. I get a little weak at the knees thinking about that lovely hair too; but we have to focus! I trust you know what to do?"

"Yes, Lieutenant!"

Nathan grinned. "Then we're all set."

"Kihihihihihihi…"

* * *

><p>"Ahh, I'm beat! If I have to pose for anymore stupid photo shoots I think my spine might snap in two!" Kotetsu complained, slumping into a nice, warm, squishy couch in the lobby. "This is a <em>joke.<em> I'm meant to be a hero, not a fashion model!"

"Quite. Nobody could ever mistake _you _for a fashion model after watching you bumbling around like an ox for ten seconds."

"Aww, cut me some slack, Bunny! Just because we can't all prance professionally like you."

"I-I don't _prance_!"

"Yes you do! You have this way of walking where you sort of, I don't know, swing your hips- just like you're advertising pants or something, but you walk like that _all the time_. It's one of the oddest things I've ever seen!"

Barnaby tried to glare, but his facial muscles went on a brief strike and twisted into a pout instead.

It was a little difficult trying to be taken seriously when his own face misinterpreted 'be a strong, scary alpha male!' as 'look heart-meltingly adorable to the point where people feel compelled to hug you!'

Kotetsu only laughed.

Barnaby flushed.

Why oh why did everything in the universe have to sabotage Barnaby's attempts to be taken seriously? First the rabbit ears, now _this_.

Before Barnaby could fire a retort, however, he was interrupted by Antonio. That was probably a good thing, since the only 'excellent' response Barnaby's highly intelligent mind had managed to come up with was 'w-well, you're _stupid_!'

"Hey, Kotetsu- oh, and Barnaby, too, of course," greeted Antonio, with a small smile. "I should've known. You can't find one without the other nowadays."

"Yep. Me and Lil' Bunny are like _this_," said Kotetsu, grinning, as he intertwined his fingers together.

Barnaby frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means, Bunny, that you enjoy spending time with your elders and betters. Who knows? Maybe you'll learn something," said Kotetsu brightly.

"Like how to avoid becoming as pathetic as _you_."

"H-hey, Bunny! Don't say things like that! You don't mean it!"

Barnaby folded his arms defiantly. "Yes I do. I definitely do."

"Aww, come on, Bunny! I thought we were a team!"

Antonio laughed as he watched the two bicker pointlessly; their conversation looping around in cycles of Barnaby saying cruel things he didn't really mean, Kotetsu whining, Barnaby slowly relenting and warming up again, and then Kotetsu spoiling it once more by saying something stupid. Honestly, those two really were like a married couple. It was almost impossible to imagine them alone now, which was bizarre, given how much they'd seemed to despise one another when they first met.

Times, they sure were a-changing.

"Ahem," Antonio coughed, cutting across the bickering duo after about the third cycle of their never-ending process, "I don't wanna interrupt you or anything, but I'm beginning to feel a little left out here. What's wrong?"

"Oh, sorry, Antonio!" said Kotetsu, looking suitably abashed. "Ahaha... I was just talking to Lil' Bu-"

"Don't. Call. Me. That."

"-aaarnaby," Kotetsu corrected himself, his voice swerving about as he tried to stop his mouth saying what it so naturally wanted to instead; 'Bunny'.

The end result was so odd even Barnaby had to smile.

Just a little.

Even though he was trying to pretend he wasn't.

"I was talking to B_ar_naby about all the photo shoots and _stuff _we've been doing lately," Kotetsu continued. "It's ridiculous! We should be saving people, not posing whilst wearing cat ears!"

Antonio quirked a brow. "Cat ears?"

"It's a long story," said Kotetsu. "But I'm kinda surprised they didn't get you dressed up as a cow or something."

"Bison _aren't _cows," said Barnaby, folding his arms.

"Same thing, really?"

"No. It's not the same thing. That's like saying there's no difference between penguins and peacocks just because they're both birds. Nature doesn't work that way, old man; it's _slightly _more complicated."

"Alright, alright, I didn't want a lecture."

"But you're so amazingly ignorant on most important subjects I thought a little learning wouldn't go amiss."

Kotetsu frowned, giving Barnaby a light flick on the forehead. "You are so uncute sometimes, Bunny."

"D-don't do that!"

"Anyway..." Once more, Antonio found himself trying to become involved in the pair's conversation- though it was growing steadily more difficult, seeing as they wanted to argue about zoology now, or something. Kotetsu had always been a big kid, but having somebody super-serious like Barnaby to tease was just making him worse. "I've been bogged down with a load of advertising jobs too, even though I'm not all that popular. It's the same for all the heroes at the moment."

"Oh?" Kotetsu- now, apparently, tiring of baiting Barnaby- turned to look at Antonio with interest. "Why is that? Is this another step in Pepsi NEX's plan for world domination?"

"Well, I couldn't say about that," said Antonio, smiling, "but I'm pretty sure I know the real reason."

Kotetsu leant forwards, putting his fingers under his chin in thought- just like a detective, only one with a stupid beard, so really, he wasn't like a detective at all.

"What's the reason?"

It was Barnaby who answered; speaking in his usual 'well _duh_' voice; an arrogant tone masked with a very thin coating of icy-cold politeness.

"It's because of Miku-Miku, isn't it?"

Antonio didn't look irritated at having his amazing deduction stolen at the last minute by Barnaby. He wasn't the type to hold grudges. That was a good thing, given he was at the bottom of the leader boards so often when it came to scoring points.

"That's precisely what I was thinking," Antonio agreed. "It's because a certain singer has become too popular."

"And now Hero TV wants to get rid of her..."

"Yes. The entertainment industry can be an unforgiving place."

"Hey, wait a sec; hold on there. What's this about a singer? What does she have to do with all this work we're suddenly getting?"

Antonio sighed, giving Barnaby a silent 'how do you put up with this man?' look. Barnaby, apparently, had understood Antonio's unspoken question, because he smirked.

"The idol known as Miku-Miku has become incredibly popular over the past few weeks," Barnaby explained. "Her popularity is beginning to take attention away from Hero TV. Our ratings are falling. That's why we've been doing so much work as of late. Agnes and the others want to shift all attention back to heroes and get rid of the rising star before she becomes a major problem."

"It happens every time some new celebrity gets a little too much attention," said Antonio. "We do more advertising, we get more money from our sponsors, we put on flashier shows and get pictures of us plastered everywhere, and then our fame is restored and the would-be star is driven out of the public eye. It's happened a couple of times in the past. To be honest… I'm surprised you never noticed, Kotetsu, given how much you hate doing publicity work."

Kotetsu shifted in his seat slightly. He looked restless. His eyes were narrowed, his fingers clenched into fists, and he was scowling.

It took him a couple of attempts to finally spit out what he wanted to say.

"But... but... but if that's the truth..."

"It is the truth," said Barnaby.

"T-Then that's _disgusting_! Heroes are meant to save people, not ruin the careers of others for their own selfish gain! What are we, walking billboards? Heroes shouldn't need all the public attention- I-I thought the point of being a hero was to _save _people!"

"You're ever the idealist, Kotetsu- but the real world doesn't work quite like that," said Antonio sadly.

"Heroes rely on the support of the general public so we can continue to fight. I imagine any pest who might steal a part of our fame, no matter how small, would be dealt with quite harshly."

"B-but... But that new singer- Miki?"

"Miku," Barnaby corrected.

"Oh, it doesn't matter! But I think… I think, she... She can't be that much older than Kaede. If we're destroying the dreams of people like that then... then... Damnit… T-that won't help civilians; that'll only make children suffer for daring to hope…"

Barnaby shifted in his seat uncomfortably; unsure of whether to place a comforting hand on Kotetsu's shoulder or not. Barnaby couldn't care less about celebrities being driven out work- and he despised the irritatingly cheery, saccharine-sweet 'Miku-Miku'. She was the most annoying girl he had ever laid his eyes upon. But Kotetsu saw things differently to him. Kotetsu cared about _everyone_- even people he had never met before; and he must have seen echoes of his own daughter in the young idol which only made him feel worse.

Kotetsu simply cared too much.

Maybe he_ had_ realized there was something a little fishy going on when the heroes workload increased threefold every time a new idol like Miku-Miku appeared, but he had never questioned it because he knew the truth would just upset him. Kotetsu might have pretended to be dense, but Barnaby was sure he wasn't that stupid.

"That'll be why Blue Rose can't become a singer, no matter how much she wants to be," Kotetsu muttered under his breath. "Because companies like ours would drive her out of business. That's... that's really messed up..."

"That's life," said Barnaby- and maybe his voice was harsher than usual, because although he understood why Kotetsu would be upset, he himself had no sympathy with those people. "It's not your fault; it's not your fault at all. That's the way things are."

"Bunny..."

"To save people, there have to be a few sacrifices. It's a necessary evil."

There was a pause; Kotetsu frowning as he looked down at his interlocked fingers.

Then, finally... he sighed.

"I know that, I guess. I've always known that. But I feel like a horrible person all the same."

"No." Barnaby's voice was firm; his hand resting lightly on Kotetsu's shoulder. "Don't be stupid. You're not horrible. Your cooking, on the other hand…"

And, finally, Kotetsu managed to smile.

Antonio, meanwhile, was beginning to feel very much like the third wheel all over again.

"You know," he muttered, more to himself than anyone else, "you two will really have to tell me when you send out invites for the wedding."

* * *

><p>"Alright! I know what I'll do!"<p>

"What?" asked Barnaby, stifling a yawn, as he leant against the side of the couch.

The pair had just finished shooting yet _another _advert, though that had been a complete and utter disaster from start to finish. Kotetsu had been grinding his teeth together with such force Barnaby swore the _skrtttt _sounds could be heard throughout the whole building. The cameraman almost had an aneurysm over Kotetsu's apparent inability to smile like he didn't have lockjaw.

Barnaby had to wonder whether Kotetsu had started some personal mission to 'subtly' (ha; Kotetsu didn't know the meaning of the word… and that might, quite possibly, have been _literal_) sabotage all of their adverts and photo shoots from now on, in a protest against the dog eat dog (or heroes eat idols) structure of the media.

On one hand, the thought of Kotetsu trying to take down the established order of the universe by himself was incredibly endearing; such a ridiculous, and yet completely _Kotetsu _thing to do.

On the other hand, it was incredibly tiring for Barnaby to smile enough for two people during photo shoots when he rarely felt like smiling enough for one as it was.

Barnaby wasn't sure whether he was amused or incredibly annoyed.

Instead, he decided to settle for something in-between the two: complete and utter exhaustion. It was a wonder he had the strength to even keep his eyes open, let alone engage in a conversation with Kotetsu. How he was going to get back to his flat was a mystery wrapped in an enigma, as far as his tired mind could puzzle out.

Maybe he could get Kotetsu to carry him. He'd rescued the old man enough times with the 'princess carry' to at _least _deserve one free ride home.

It wasn't like a comatose Barnaby Brooks Jr. being carried in the arms of some mystery man through the streets of Sternbild would attract the attention of the paparazzi or anything.

God. What a mess.

"What are you going to do?" Barnaby (finally) managed to reply, attempting to stifle a yawn at the same time. "Something... somethin' stupid, no doubt."

"Hey, have some faith in me! I made a decision!"

"W-wha'?"

"I'm going to become this new idol girl's number one fan!"

Kotetsu beamed proudly, as though he had just said something groundbreaking, revolutionary; something that would tip the world off its axis and send it plummeting into the sun.

But Barnaby didn't really care.

He was tired, his hair was less than perfect and he really, _really_ disliked Kotetsu's sudden feelings of affection towards a pint-sized idol with turquoise hair.

Maybe it was jealousy- or maybe it was…

…

...Nah, it was mostly jealousy. Barnaby was too tired to even try and fool himself into believing there was any reason other than jealousy he disliked Miku-Miku.

It wasn't like Miku-Miku had any serious problems truly deserving of teary-eyed sympathy. She probably still had both parents, and a roof over her head, and a happy home life.

She didn't need help.

Not at all.

"Bunny?" Kotetsu asked- looking at Barnaby in alarm, when Barnaby failed to be super-enthusiastic about his 'incredible' idea. "What's wrong?"

_I'm jealous that you seem to care more about this unknown girl than me and I should be happy this newfound goal will stop you from looking like a kicked puppy and grinding your teeth throughout all our photo shoots, but honestly, I'm a really selfish, petty person and I want you all to myself. Also, I want you to carry me home because I always rescue you and now it's _your _turn to play the handsome Prince Not-So-Charming because Sleeping Beauty really needs to get some rest- and damn, did I just refer to _myself _as 'Sleeping Beauty' in my own internal monologue? What is happening to me?_

Barnaby didn't actually voice that storm of nonsensical, sleep-deprived, smushed together angst, however. He didn't think he had the energy.

Instead, he just muttered, "Sleepy."

"...Aww." Kotetsu smiled softly, as he patted Barnaby on the head. "That... is pretty cute."

"Don't 'aww' me. I could still beat you in a fight right now."

_Yawwwwn_.

"I believe you; I'm not disputing that," Kotetsu said fondly. "I just didn't think _you_, of all people, would trust anyone enough to drop the 'I'm inhumanly perfect' act for two seconds to show you can actually get tired sometimes. I'm a little flattered, to be honest!"

Barnaby pouted- then cursed his face, once more, for inadvertently pulling all those 'adowable' expressions.

"'Course I'm human. Just don't show people very often."

"I gathered. Do you want me to take you back to your house?"

Barnaby did want very, very much- but he tried to remain impassive.

"You don't need to. I can take a taxi by myself."

"On your own? Never! As if I would let my poor, defenceless Lil' Bunny go off by himself with some random stranger. I don't want anybody to take advantage of you. I definitely need to be with you, so I can protect you!"

It was a mark of how tired Barnaby was that he didn't correct Kotetsu about what his real name was. Instead (a further shocking testament to his apparent exhaustion), he only smiled.

"Heh. If somebody tried to pick a fight _I'd _be the one who'd do the protecting."

"T-that's not true! I'm reliable too, you know," said Kotetsu, prodding Barnaby on the nose. "See, I'll prove it. I'll call us a taxi and I'll accompany you; just like a proper gentleman. They never leave ladies on their own, you know? Or... something like that, anyway. I don't think that really applies to our situation- but it's the same thing. Now, let's see... Cell phone, cell phone, cell... phone...?"

There was a pause.

Then, Kotetsu sighed.

"Oh man. I can't believe this."

"Wha'?"

Kotetsu glared. "I can't find the damn thing. I swore I left it in my pocket, but..."

Barnaby yawned- and yet, despite the fact his eyelids were like lead weights, he was still able to chastise Kotetsu. "You always leave it lying around. Be more careful."

"I will, I will; I swear- but I'm_ sure_ I left it in my pocket!"

"If it's not there you obviously didn't."

"I swear, it just disappeared, honestly! Arghhh." With a sound of long suffering, Kotetsu ran his hands through his hair. "Why does my stuff always vanish like this? You'd think it grew legs and walked away!"

"So much for being reliable, huh, old man. Your memory's staring to go."

"S-shut up, Bunny."

"It can't have gone far," Barnaby said, using his best 'reasonable' voice despite the fact he wanted nothing more than to fall asleep curled up in a little ball. "Bet it's round here somewhere. Just call your number from my cell phone and you can track it down wi'..." _Yaaaawn. _"Wi' the ringtone."

Kotetsu's eyes widened. Why hadn't even thought of that?

Even half catatonic, Barnaby was still more logical than he was.

Oh well. Now was no time to hold grudges. Without Barnaby's help, Kotetsu could easily foresee a very real scenario where he'd spend three hours running around like a headless chicken checking the same spots over and over again in case his cell phone had magically materialized into any of them between his searches, then getting nowhere, losing his cell phone forever and having to buy a newer, more modern model because they didn't sell his old type anymore, _and then_ being completely incapable of using it because it was too technologically complicated and had far too many little buttons and flashing lights.

"Thanks, Bunny. I seriously love you right now," said Kotetsu gratefully, ruffling his partner's hair with one hand.

The 'I love you' made Barnaby's breath catch his throat slightly; but, luckily, Kotetsu didn't see his slightly flushed cheeks, being too busy ham-fistedly punching his number into Barnaby's cell phone. Barnaby would complain about Kotetsu being completely graceless whilst handling his top-of-the-range cell phone and 'are you trying to break it on _purpose _just because you always lose yours?', but he couldn't bring himself to do it.

He was too busy smiling over the careless use of those three words.

...Damn.

He really was pathetic.

"Right, that should do it," said Kotetsu, once he'd inputted the number into Barnaby's cell phone. "I owe you one, partner. Where would I be without you, huh?"

"...Dead in a ditch somewhere?"

"It was a rhetorical question."

"It was a perfectly reasonable response."

Kotetsu stuck out his tongue- then hit the call button on Barnaby's cell phone.

There was a silence.

And then music began to play from underneath the couch on the opposite side of the room; but it certainly wasn't any song Kotetsu could remember listening to.

_I wanna I wanna I wanna I wanna_  
><em>Hug you<em>_  
><em>_I wanna I wanna I wanna I wanna__  
><em>_Hug you_  
><em>Let's you and me go to bed~<em>

Kotetsu's face turned bright red.

"T-that's not my ringtone; c-certainly not for your number, B-bunny! I swear I've never heard that song in my life!"

Barnaby only smirked.

"Are you trying to tell me something, Kotetsu?"

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, Pao-Lin and Nathan were giggling to themselves as they pondered over the fruits of their handiwork.<p>

If that song didn't kick start Kotetsu into realizing his real feelings for Barnaby, then nothing would.

Apart from maybe being beaten upside the head with a brick.

* * *

><p><strong>an: **As always I amaze myself at being able to write so many words about what is, essentially, nothing XD;

Pao-Lin is totally channeling Maria from Umineko no Naku Koro Ni with her constant 'kikikikikiki's XD;;  
>I kinda want to give Keith and Karina and Ivan more screen time but they will get a little more focus in time, I'm sure ^^;; I love huge casts too much to not involve them :3<p>

The meme used here was:  
>http :  / www . youtube . com/watch?v=M4cLbjpwDs0

The song lyrics were taken directly from that particular song XD;;

As always, read & review? Though it's really pointless putting 'read' down here, 'cause I assume you must've read the chapter already be on the a/ns. How many people even read a/ns anyway? Most of the time I just skip them, unless I have a weird stalker-y love for a certain author and I wanna know what they've been doing lately XD

**~renahhchen xoxo**


	5. True my heart

Vegetable Juice  
>o5: 'True my heart'<p>

* * *

><p>"Hey, Bunny. Wake up."<p>

No response.

"Rise and shine, Sleeping Beauty?"

Still no response.

"_Hey_."

Pouting like a child whose parents wouldn't get out of bed early enough on Christmas day, Kotetsu prodded Barnaby in the cheek- and none too gently, either. Then again, 'gently' wasn't really Kotetsu's forte; loud and brash was.

"Bunny. Earth to Bunny. Bunny on the mother ship in dreamland- this is planet Earth calling!"

"N-ngh... D-dreamland?"

Well, at least _that _managed to get Barnaby's attention.

Kotetsu grinned. "It was something me an' Tomoe used to say to Kaede to wake her up in the mornings when she was a kid. I'm glad to see it still works."

"M'not a child," Barnaby retorted grumpily. "I'm an adult. Don't talk to me like that."

"Sorry, sorry."

"And you're really _loud_, too- do you know that?"

"Well, I had to be loud- you were snoring like the dead."

"I don't _snore_."

"How do you know? You were asleep. If anyone here is fit to judge whether you snore or not, it's me."

Barnaby scowled, unsure whether Kotetsu was teasing him or not. He thought he knew Kotetsu well enough now to figure out when he was being serious and when he wasn't (mainly because Kotetsu was rarely serious), but when he was half-asleep puzzling out the finer details of human emotion was a pain.

Tch. He was beginning to get a headache.

"You're loud all the time, even when you're not trying to wake me up. Have some finesse."

Kotetsu only laughed. "I could say the same about your hair."

"...What?"

"Your hair. You see, it kiiiinda looks like it might eat me. I guess that's what happens when you fall asleep against my shoulder in the taxi going home- but I'm curious now. Does it look that insane _every _morning?"

Barnaby blushed. "S-shut up."

"What, I didn't say anything! I think that natural look suits you! It's cute!"

"Whatever..."

Scowling, Barnaby pushed himself away from Kotetsu. As if on autopilot, his fingers moved towards his hair, trying to flatten it out so it looked less like a blond seaweedy tentacle monster from the deep and more like his usual, fangirl-swoon-inducing curls.

"I think you might have your priorities slightly skewed there, Bunny," said Kotetsu, amused, as he watched Barnaby rake his fingers through his hair.

"What do you mean?"

"I didn't oh-so-cruelly rouse you from your sweet dreams so you could do your hair. I need you to open the door of your apartment."

"H-huh?"

Inwardly, Barnaby cursed himself over his less-than-stellar responses. If he acted like that in his interviews his fans would probably start to think Kotetsu's idiocy was rubbing off on him. In Barnaby's defence, though, he was very, very tired. Emotional turmoil coupled with inexplicable jealousy (actually, it was perfectly explicable, but Barnaby almost wished he didn't understand his own feelings) and far too much extra advertising to do, on top of being a hero and defending the world from... well, _everything_, was beginning to take its toll on him.

Irritatingly enough, Kotetsu seemed to be handling all the pressure rather well.

It wasn't like _he_ was being kept up every night by bad dreams born from a broken memory or constant, fluttering doubts about his less-than-chaste feelings over his partner, though.

"-paying attention to me, Lil' Bunny?"

"Don't call me that," Barnaby replied, without thinking. "What were you saying?"

"You're proving my point. I think you need to get an early night; you're falling apart," said Kotetsu.

His voice was teasing, but worry was evident in there; just like the numerous times before he'd lectured Barnaby about eating his five a day and wrapping up warm in the winter.

"You need to let yourself into your apartment. I mean, I could've just left you sleeping in the hallway like this, but I thought that wouldn't exactly be a very friendly thing to do. I have to admit, it was pretty tempting, though."

Barnaby glared. "...Jerk. If you did that, I'd never forgive you."

"And that's precisely why I_ didn't_ do it, even though I wanted to very much! Your friendship means more to me than a few seconds of laughter over a silly prank," said Kotetsu brightly, watching as Barnaby pressed his hand against the scanner and inputted the code to open the door of his apartment.

The door slid open with a metallic _zzzt_.

"Honestly- what was wrong with a good, old-fashioned key? Everything's so complicated nowadays."

"It's more secure to lock rooms with technology like this," Barnaby explained wearily. He'd told Kotetsu that once already the first time he came over- completely uninvited and unwanted- with the Mayor's son and Pao-Lin in tow. "You're so far behind the rest of society, old man, I'm surprised you don't live in a cave."

And yet, despite his retort, Barnaby... was smiling.

'_Your friendship means more to me than few seconds of laughter_.'

Friendship...

Suddenly, without any warning, Barnaby felt his eyes prickle slightly; a sting that made him shudder.

He must've been even more tired than he thought.

* * *

><p>Kotetsu stared up at the very black and white wall of Barnaby's very black and white bedroom, legs crossed and head tilted back. His hat would have fallen off if it hadn't been pinned between his head and the wall.<p>

"Wow, your room really is... empty."

"Less stuff to clean up."

"Yeah, but still... isn't that depressing?"

"Not really."

"I mean… Hm. _My_ flat's a complete and utter trash heap, but you have to have a few personal things here and there, don't you? I have all my old photos everywhere, and even some stuffed toys I used to have when I was a kid. I even have the first CD I bought! Not to mention all the pictures and stuff Kaede drew for me when she was younger and- heh, I remember when she emptied a whole glitter pen drawing some sparkly unicorn creature and she got funny-smelling glitter pen gunge all over the white carpet of the living room back home. Me an' Tomoe thought it was funny- until we had to clean it up. That... was a complete and utter disaster, speaking frankly."

Kotetsu laughed softly, the sound of his voice filling the otherwise silent flat.

Barnaby was lying under his duvet, curled up, with Kotetsu sat to the side. It was a good job there was enough room for both of them, or Barnaby would've kicked Kotetsu onto the floor.

Barnaby was still exhausted, impossibly so, and was sure any moment now he'd turn into a real zombie and demand a strict diet of human brains. That would be good for Kotetsu, really, given he didn't seem to have any.

Hmn; Barnaby would have to file that thought away for later use.

Should the occasion ever arise, Kotetsu would be a good shield to use against the hungry undead.

"Hey, Kotetsu," said Barnaby quietly, "You talk way, way too much."

Kotetsu's laughter died out at that- and, sheepishly, he rubbed the back of his head, grinning.

"Sorry, sorry. I guess I got a little carried away."

"Talking about interior design, of all things."

"Well, it was more about Kaede really... You'll have to forgive me; proud parents like me can babble on and on about their kids for _ages_. It's just part of being a dad, I guess."

"Hmn… I wonder…" A pause. Barnaby opened and closed his mouth- the words sticking in his throat. "If my parents spoke about me like that…"

Was there really any point in asking? It wasn't like Kotetsu would know.

But that didn't stop him from responding, voice fond.

"I bet they did. I saw you together in that photo and you looked like a happy family. You were a sweet kid."

"A lot of things have changed since then."

There was a small silence; Barnaby yawning tiredly, though he still couldn't get to sleep.

Despite Kotetsu's calming presence (why hadn't he gone home yet anyway?), nightmares still hovered at the edge of Barnaby's brain; noxious bits and pieces of half-formed memory that taunted him- the darkened figure turning around, and _this time_, for sure, he'd see his true identity...

But Barnaby never did.

Instead, the face of the man who murdered his parents would melt away into nothingness; fire spreading across his skin in a hellish inferno until it no longer looked human.

The murderer was Jake, right? It _had_ to be Jake; Barnaby refused to believe it was any other person. Kriem's condition was still so unstable it was impossible to talk to her, and Barnaby had no reason to dispute the logic that Jake was the killer.

He had to be.

Barnaby had no reason to seek revenge anymore; he was _happy_.

At least, that was what he told himself.

But it didn't explain why his mind insisted on showing him that scene from Christmas Eve all those years ago.

Was he missing something here…?

Spores of doubt continued to manifest themselves in Barnaby's brain- thorny roots of indecision burrowing through all his assurances it was fine, it was _over_, in the most chilling way.

He didn't want to doubt his happiness; not anymore.

He had to move on.

But it was a little difficult to do that when he couldn't stop_ thinking_ about it.

Kotetsu's babble was a distraction- a comfort; even if it was only a very small one. Barnaby had been able to sleep soundlessly against Kotetsu's side in the taxi- and, embarrassingly enough, it was the best half hour of rest and relaxation he'd had in the past few weeks.

"Hey, Bunny... Am I annoying you?"

Barnaby smiled; glad Kotetsu had asked a question he could easily answer.

"You _always _annoy me."

"Ahh, don't say it in such a matter-of-fact manner, or I might seriously start to believe you!"

"And who's saying I'm lying?"

"Humph." A pout; a rustle of duvet, as Kotetsu got to his feet. "Ungrateful kid; especially after I paid for the taxi back here- which was extortionate, may I add- _and_ let you use my shoulder as a makeshift bed, _and then_ carried you up allll those stairs to your flat."

"Didn't you use the elevator?"

"T-that's beside the point!"

"Then you didn't carry me up the stairs."

"Stairs, elevator, whatever; I still had to carry you physically, like, in my arms, and that's no joke, Bunny! I can hardly even pick Kaede up anymore! If I'm all sore tomorrow it'll be entirely _your _fault."

"Oh dear. Perhaps I should apologize in advance."

"Perhaps you should."

There was another small silence. Then, finally, Barnaby said; "...Sorry." And, even softer still; "Thank you."

Kotetsu laughed again.

"Don't mention it. I was just kidding. It'd take more than carrying a pipsqueak like you to put Wild Tiger out of commission!" Kotetsu struck a pose; arms akimbo, a smirk on his face. Sadly, the effect was lost on Barnaby, who was staring at the wall with his eyes closed.

Kotetsu sighed.

"I get the feeling I'm being a pain. Maybe I should just go now- otherwise you won't get your beauty sleep and you'll be really angry in the morning! Worse than usual... Damn." A false shudder. "Now _that's _a scary idea."

At those words, Barnaby felt himself freeze up; his breath catching in his throat, heart beating erratically. He was seized with a sudden, childish urge to say 'no'; to grab hold of Kotetsu and make him stay right there, damn it- because, even though Barnaby pretended the other man's company annoyed him greatly, that wasn't true.

Well, no, it was true- but 'annoyance' wasn't the _only _emotion that registered when Barnaby was with Kotetsu.

Barnaby... _wanted_ to hear silly stories about Kaede this and Kaede that; he_ wanted _to feel more involved in the happy, cotton wool-fluffy family atmosphere that surrounded Kotetsu; he even wanted to hear Kotetsu talking about Tomoe, because that proved it was possible to recover even when somebody you loved died.

It didn't have to be the end of your universe.

You could always create a new one.

When Kotetsu told Barnaby about his family, it... made Barnaby feel like part of a family, too.

It made him feel wanted.

Trusted.

But Barnaby didn't know how to voice any of that without sounding like a complete and utter fool- and being a fool was really Kotetsu's 'thing', not his. He had so many things he wanted to say, but he didn't know how to say them at all- and years of self-imposed solitude, thinking only of revenge like some kind of machine, had slowly but surely taken its toll on Barnaby's ability to communicate his true feelings with others.

And so, like an idiot, Barnaby decided to push Kotetsu away.

"Good. Maybe if you go, I'll be able to get some sleep. Really, though… I have to wonder why you stayed in my apartment so long to begin with."

"Yeah. I wondered about that a little, actually," said Kotetsu, voice a little embarrassed, "but I realized the answer was really, really simple."

"And that was...?"

"Your flat is so big and empty and kind of _lonely_- it feels like a crypt in here! If I had to live somewhere like this, it would kill me! Leaving you here by yourself would be a bit like... like leaving you a charnel house or a coffin or something- a-and, to be honest, I kind of think dumping you outside in the corridor would've been kinder than dumping you here. Maybe I'm not making much sense, but... But I don't understand how you can be happy here all by yourself."

Barnaby shuddered slightly at the words, though he wasn't cold.

His heart seemed to skip a beat.

When he spoke, his voice was measured, icy, as always.

"Ha... You're worried about me, old man?"

"Of course I am! We're partners, aren't we?"

"...True." A smile crept onto Barnaby's lips; and he was sure, no matter what he did, it would stay there. Damn Kotetsu and his ability to make him so disgustingly _cheerful_- because with a few badly chosen words and some cheap shots at his interior decorating skills, Barnaby was sure he had never felt more wanted. "But you would worry about me all the same. You're just that kind of person."

"And you're the kind of person who'd sit around feeling sorry for yourself without telling anybody what's wrong because you're too embarrassed to ask for help. Am I right?"

"D-don't make such huge judgements about my character so lightly!"

Kotetsu only smiled.

"I'll let you go to sleep for now, Lil' Bunny- but I'm not gonna leave your apartment."

"Oh, hooray," said Barnaby sarcastically.

"I know. I'm like a disease- or a plague of locusts! You can't get rid of me that easy; not when I'm worried about you. And I'm totally calling the couch for tonight."

"I don't have one."

"Then I'll sleep on that weird armchair thing in the living room. I'd hate to think of you waking up here allll by yourself; especially as you've been looking a bit down. Kind of sick, maybe? But, Bunny, just a heads up- you really need to be more accommodating to your guests in the future."

"I never invited you to stay here."

"You haven't told me leave yet, either, though."

Barnaby didn't have any response for that.

* * *

><p>"You know, I think your stupid armchair has murdered me."<p>

Barnaby did a double take when he walked into the kitchen to find Kotetsu in all his just-woken-up bedhead glory, and had to force himself not to squeak like a hamster that had been dropped from a cliff. Kotetsu was there, and his hair...

It was a _mess_.

"Good morning to you, too, Bunny," said Kotetsu brightly, once he had realized no greeting was forthcoming from the shocked man. "I'm very appreciative of your concern. No, don't worry- I'm sure my back will be fine! In a few years, maybe. Man." With a yawn Kotetsu stretched; his back cracking in the process. "I think I would've been more comfy sleeping on the floor."

Barnaby clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth and made a 'tch' sound. It was the exact same thing Kotetsu's mother had done all those years ago when he accidentally put a hole through the kitchen table in a sudden, uncontrollable burst of hundred power.

"I didn't ask you to stay."

"But I did anyway because I'm a lovely person."

"Or an annoying one."

"Heh. Say whatever you want; I know it's not true. How could anybody hate _me_?" Kotetsu asked, giving Barnaby a peace sign and a million watt grin. "Oh, and by the way, Bunny- nice hair."

Barnaby's left brow twitched. "If you comment on my personal appearance once more this morning I am going to gut you slowly. And painfully. With a fruit knife."

"Aww, c'mon, Bunny, you love me really!"

At that, Barnaby made a small spluttering noise, as though he'd just swallowed a golf ball. His face turned light pink- and, with an indignant 'humph!' he turned his back on Kotetsu, arms folded.

The whole performance was so adorable Kotetsu couldn't help but laugh.

In his defence, he tried really, _really_ hard not to…

For about five seconds, at least.

"Well, at least _I _wasn't the one with the weird ringtone on my cell phone," Barnaby retorted.

"T-that wasn't even mine!"

"Of course not; it was the moon sprites playing a joke, wasn't it?"

Kotetsu winced, backing against the fridge. "Ahaha... Even after he's just woken up Bunny is still sharp as ever. You looked so cute a few moments ago, and then you went and ruined it!"

"Whatever. I'm going to have a shower. You... stay there. And try not to break anything."

And with that, Barnaby marched out of the kitchen, slamming the door behind him.

Kotetsu smiled.

"Well, somebody got up on the wrong side of the bed."

* * *

><p><strong>an: **I actually have the next chapter finished as well because I wrote them together and then decided it sounded better if I cut them in two, and, yeah. This was, surprisingly enough, really, _really_ difficult to write ._. I kept thinking it sounded awful, but then when I reread it I realized it was /mostly/ decent, but atm I'm feeling kind of sceptical about my writing abilities (or lack of thereof).  
>I'm really not sure about how my writing is at the moment so… what do you think? *is anxious*<p>

**~renahhchen xoxo**


	6. Ievan polkka

Vegetable Juice  
>o6: Ievan Polkka<p>

* * *

><p>The streets of Sternbild were unusually cold that morning. One would've thought the tall, towering buildings would have offered some insulation from the wind, but that didn't stop the light breeze from running through clothes and ruffling hair in a fashion that made Barnaby frown.<p>

Barnaby was always frowning. It was his default look- which would've made the Barnaby Brooks Jr. brand Mr. Potato Head ridiculously easy to make. It only needed one expression.

Recently, however…

Well.

It seemed that Barnaby frowned even harder when he was trying not to smile.

Was he _afraid _of being happy or something? Or maybe he was just embarrassed about looking human, like everybody else.

Heh.

That was why it always felt like such a huge accomplishment when Kotetsu managed to get Barnaby to laugh- the normally calm, composed man forgetting himself for just a few moments; and Kotetsu would be lying if it said it didn't make him feel happy, too, when Barnaby smiled.

He had a nice smile. It was a little unfair he only shared it with the public during photo shoots, and those smiles were frosty round the edges; not even real.

Barnaby's real smiles were a lot more handsome.

"-staring at me for?"

"H-huh?" Kotetsu blinked at Barnaby in confusion; eyes wide underneath his mask (it was a little annoying he needed to wear that every time he went outside with Barnaby, but he could deal). "What are you talking about, Bunny?"

"You were staring at me. It was creepy."

"O-oh, I was just wondering how your hair-"

"Don't make any more comments about that. It's getting _old_."

"Alright, alright, killjoy. Take away my greatest source of entertainment, why don't you?" Kotetsu grinned, ruffling Barnaby's head roughly. He didn't care if Barnaby would murder him later for that- it was totally worth it to see the irritated look on his face. "So, what were you complaining about before you started complaining about me looking at you? Did I commit the heinous offence of breathing your air?"

"Alright. One, don't touch me. Two, you were _staring_, not looking. Three, I don't always complain- and four… I was asking what your point is."

"You mean, the point of my existence? That's a pretty tricky question, Bunny! I know you're meant to turn to your elders in time of help, but not even I know the meaning of life!"

Barnaby rolled his eyes. "Yes, very clever. I was wondering what your point was in taking me shopping- not being alive, although that is a very good question, too."

Kotetsu pulled a face. "Ouch. That _burned_, Bunny."

"Why are you so concerned about my health anyway?" Barnaby asked, ignoring Kotetsu. "It's annoying."

"It's simple; how many times do I have to tell you? It's because you're my-"

"Partner, I know," Barnaby finished. "And your constant desire to 'help' me has nothing to do with the fact you're a very nosy person who can't keep out of other people's business, now, does it?"

"Hey, c'mon, lighten up. You mistake being 'caring' for being 'prying' way too easily! Don't be so cynical, Bunny- it's bad for your health!"

"And I'm sure sleeping on that armchair in my living room all night was bad for your health, too, but you still did it anyway. That thing wasn't designed for comfort, you know, it was just there to look good."

"Like most of the stuff in your impractical-but-awesome- at least, I think younger kids would call it awesome? I think it's sort of miserable- flat, right?"

There was a pause; Barnaby's impassive expression flickering slightly. It looked like he was trying very hard not to smile.

"...Idiot."

And then, of course, he had to ruin his brief moment of softness by saying something cruel.

"You know, I can't tell whether you're insulting me or paying me a compliment," said Kotetsu, smiling. "It's a very real dilemma..."

"Make of it what you will. You have ears; you can understand what I'm saying just fine."

"Yep. Unfortunately, I'm not very well-versed in your weird brand of 'Bunny-talk', where you say one thing and mean another altogether." Kotetsu continued to smile, elbowing Barnaby in the ribs. "I know you're happy really!"

"Why should I be happy?" Barnaby countered. "You're only taking me grocery shopping."

"What do you mean, 'only'? You need food to live-"

"Yes, I am aware of that."

"-and you didn't have any food at _all _in your fridge! Of course I'd worry about you in a situation like that! How do you feed yourself?"

Barnaby frowned. "I manage just fine."

"Uh-uh, Bunny- no way! Eating take out every night isn't 'managing just fine'; it's unhealthy! You'll get fat!"

"I doubt it." In an almost arrogant movement (wait, what- there was no 'almost' there at all; Barnaby was _definitely _showing off), Barnaby ran his hands through his 'perfect' hair, smirking. "I have to run around after you so much there's not a chance I'd gain any weight. Don't recycle the lectures your mother gives you with me- they don't apply."

Kotetsu's eyes widened to comic proportions. "H-how did you know my mom said that to me? Bunny…" His voice dropped to a conspiratorial whisper. "Are you _physic_?"

"Don't be stupid. You told me about it a few days ago."

"Hn… I did? Sharp memory, Bunny."

"Well, it helps that I'm not old like you."

"You'll get there one day, don't worry, ahaha!~ Think of all the things you have to look forward to; like back pains and a bad memory, and annoying young heroes who think they're the best thing since sliced bread!"

"Hm… And you except me to be excited that I'm going shopping with a man like _you_? My life isn't so joyless I'd be happy about this. It's hardly a romantic date or any- ngh…"

The moment those words left his mouth, Barnaby regretted them.

Since when had he suddenly begun to suffer from a chronic case of foot-in-mouth syndrome? That was Kotetsu's thing!

Fortunately, Kotetsu didn't take Barnaby's words seriously. Instead, he grinned, prodding Barnaby in the cheek.

"Oh? Is that what you want, Lil' Bunny?"

Barnaby sniffed, turning his head and folding his arms. "Of course not, old man. Don't get hopeful."

"I won't. I don't really want to take in a pet rabbit anyway."

Barnaby's eyes narrowed. "Pet?"

"My brother had rabbit when we were kids- did you know?" Kotetsu said, changing the awkward topic to a more light-hearted one- not even realizing he was doing it. "It was the cutest thing ever! At least, until it got eaten by a fox. Well… half-eaten, really, 'cause the fox sort of left bits and pieces of it lying around it didn't like…" He frowned. "After that, the poor lil' bunny looked a bit like an impressionists' painting- you know, the really awful ones a blindfolded monkey could do, with lots of red everywhere?"

"I think that's a career choice that would suit you perfectly. Just think- you could be paid _real money _for having no talent."

"Ahaha, well, maybe. But... We had to bury the rabbit in the back garden, and I was only six. It gave me nightmares for weeks." Kotetsu shuddered; though he was still smiling. "I really couldn't stand to take in another bunny after that- so no romantic dates for you."

"I'm not going to be eaten by a fox, though, am I?"

There was a small pause, Kotetsu grinning whilst Barnaby halted in his tracks; fingers clenching into fists, cheeks turning pink.

"And that 'date' thing was just a slip of the tongue, you know."

"I get it, I get it! I'm only joking~ You need to laugh at yourself a little."

"And you need to learn when it's okay to _not _laugh."

Kotetsu pouted. "Don't be like that- I didn't mean to hit a nerve or anything."

Barnaby continued to sulk.

"Hey, I did offer to buy you breakfast- not to mention vegetables and all the stuff you need to, you know, stay alive. You can't be angry with me when I'm trying to put some protein and fibre into you!" Kotetsu whined. Unwittingly, he found he was doing an excellent impression of Kaede that one Christmas where- horror of horrors- Kotetsu bought her a _green _bike instead of a pink one. "I'm being serious now. What do you live on?"

"Determination and resolve."

There was a small silence; Kotetsu, momentarily, left at a loss for words.

Then, he doubled over with laughter.

"Y-you were trying to sound 'cool', right? Ahh, that's priceless- totally priceless! You're such an adorable kid sometimes, Bunny!"

"...I was being serious."

"Sure, sure. Although..." Kotetsu smiled. "Maybe I _have_ taken in a stray rabbit after all. I mean, I'm even feeding you now- imagine that."

Barnaby's glare intensified.

If looks could kill, Kotetsu would have been dead twelve times over.

* * *

><p>The grocery shop was fairly empty for a Saturday morning. Most people were probably still in bed at this time, figured Barnaby- and really, he was feeling tired and probably should have been asleep too. Damn Kotetsu for dragging him around the city at ungodly hours of the morning, just so he could feed him; there was nothing wrong with his kitchen being a food-freeze zone!<p>

The thought of perishable items that could go mouldy or become a breeding ground for maggots being stored in his pristine flat made Barnaby feel a little ill.

There were many things in life Barnaby hated, and mold was definitely near the top of the list; perhaps being beaten out only by 'fire' and the nickname 'Lil' Bunny'.

Even so, Barnaby couldn't bring himself to be truly angry with Kotetsu. He was only meddling because he was worried about him- Barnaby knew that only too well. In a way, although it was irritating being treated like a child, it was still... nice (a horribly inadequate word) to know Kotetsu cared about him so much.

Then again, Kotetsu cared about everyone- being a big damn hero and all.

Barnaby felt a little selfish for thinking such a thing- but he wished Kotetsu would smile less with Karina and Pao-Lin and Antonio and the others, and smile a little more around him. They were meant to be 'partners', after all. Didn't that mean he should, at least, get more smiles than the others?

It wasn't really a topic he could bring up, though- and he felt stupid for worrying about it so much.

With a fierce determination, Barnaby tried to focus his attention on his surroundings; forcing his mind away from meanderings towards Kotetsu.

The shelves of the shop were stocked full of vegetables- mostly green, but with a few splashes of red and orange thrown in there for variation. Cardboard boxes containing yet more rank-smelling vegetation were placed on various tables, displayed oh-so-prettily as though they were there to be admired, not eaten.

Barnaby didn't really like vegetables.

He didn't like food in general, full stop- even the stuff that didn't decompose over time and become a breeding ground for flies.

If he told Kotetsu about that, the older man would probably laugh, ruffle his hair (a worrying trend that was beginning to develop) and call him a fussy kid, a picky eater, then launch into some story about Kaede not wanting to eat her green peas.

Kotetsu was so predictable.

But… Barnaby liked that.

He liked the stability. It made him feel safe- giving him the same kind of warm feeling he got when he recalled times spent with his parents; small handfuls of memory that he could remember in starting detail.

Meanwhile, the blonde-haired girl at the counter was plugged into her iPod, bobbing her head to an unheard beat whilst she idly turned pages of some fashion magazine (featuring this summer's styles worn by Blue Rose!, the front cover announced). She looked so bored it was a wonder she had the strength to hold her head up.

"Why are we here anyway?" Barnaby asked, as he inspected a box filled with... some kind of weird green thing? What _was_ that, anyway? Half of the food here he couldn't even name.

"I already told you. To stop you from starving."

"Yes, but we could have gone to a supermarket. They have more choice there."

"No, no, no, Bunny," said Kotetsu, smiling, as he waved a reprimanding finger in Barnaby's face. Barnaby had to stifle the urge to bite it. "The vegetables here are far more fresh and healthy."

"And expensive."

"Be quiet; I can afford it. This is proper food, Bunny, for proper cooking!"

"As always, your outlook on life is old-fashioned. Everybody goes to supermarkets nowadays," said Barnaby, sighing. "If this is 'proper' food, then why haven't I heard of half of this stuff?"

"Because you don't cook for yourself."

"You can't cook either; I've heard the rumors that fried rice is the only dish you can make."

"That is absolutely not true!"

"Really? Well then..." With a challenging smirk, Barnaby pointed towards the box filled with green somethings that had eluded him before and said, "What are those?"

Kotetsu blinked at them in confusion, his head tilted to one side. They may well have been seed pods of an alien life form from Neptune for all the recognition that flickered across Kotetsu's face.

"Well, those are... they're... They're definitely _something_, I'm sure."

Barnaby grinned a small grin of triumph. "See? You don't know. Maybe your 'help' will only be a liability here, as usual."

Kotetsu stared at Barnaby's retreating back, a pout forming across his face.

"Hey, wait up, Lil' Bunny, I- ow!"

There was a loud crash.

A squeal.

A thump.

The squeal did not come from Kotetsu (it was _way _too high-pitched, and it would've been worrying if it had)- but the mantra of 'o-ow, damn it damn it...' certainly did.

Even the bored-looking girl at the counter looked up at that. With a scowl that could have melted through metal (wow. And Barnaby thought _his _glares were piercing), she popped out one of her ear buds and said, voice cold, "You're cleaning that up."

Kotetsu laughed nervously. "Y-yes Miss!"

Miss Blonde and Pouty scowled. "You can pay for it, too. I'm not made of money." Then, under her breath, she muttered, "'Specially not with them bringing out new cell phones every other day, each more expensive than the last. It's such a scam- and I'm totally buying into it, too..."

And with that, she put her ear bud back in and looked dismissively down at her magazine.

What had she been referring to with such rage, though?

Why, it was only the mess of vegetables that was now rolling across the floor. They had been knocked out of a young girl's basket when Kotetsu blindly ran to catch up with Barnaby, and they'd gone flying through the air- along with Kotetsu and the girl. Some of the vegetables had been reduced to a sticky green ooze of splattered leftovers that stained the floor, whilst other vegetables were whole, but undoubtedly bruised and covered in dirt- certainly not eligible for human consumption anymore.

The girl Kotetsu had hit- short of stature, with brown hair pulled into two pigtails- winced, holding her stomach.

"O-ow... T-that really hurts..."

Kotetsu looked at her in alarm.

Of course, thought Barnaby, saving the civilian would have to come first in Kotetsu's book. Cleaning up the vegetable-ish chaos he'd created would only happen after. Too bad Kotetsu had neglected to remember the girl had only been thrown to the floor because of _him._

The moment Kotetsu asked if the girl was alright her face turned pale. Grabbing hold of the nearest vegetable on the floor (which happened to be a leek), she scuttled backwards, pointing it at Kotetsu like a weapon.

The betrayed look on Kotetsu's face was priceless.

"You clean up the mess you made, old man," Barnaby said, rolling his eyes. "You should be used to it by now. I'll have to take care of the wounded."

"Show off."

"Acting like a responsible adult is hardly showing off," Barnaby answered smoothly. He then turned to look at the girl, who was still clutching hold of the leek as though it were a lifeline. "I hope you're alright, Miss. My… 'friend' didn't mean to run into you- he's just very clumsy."

"Hey!"

"And unintelligent."

"_Bunny_!"

Smiling, Barnaby extended a hand towards the girl. "Do you need any help?"

The girl nodded slowly, a blush spreading across her face, as she put her leek to one side and placed her tiny hand in Barnaby's. He pulled her to her feet with relative ease- though she stumbled a little getting up; falling forwards so Barnaby had to catch her against his chest.

Her blush turned bright red at that.

If it had been a scene from a shoujo manga, hearts and roses would have spontaneously erupted around the embracing pair- and the girl seemed to know that only too well, for it looked as if she was beginning to hyperventilate.

Maybe that came from the shock of being knocked over whilst carrying a basket of vegetables a few moments ago, though.

Meanwhile, in the background, the irritable blond cashier with the side ponytail had thrown a mop roughly at Kotetsu's head, and she was shouting at him. There was absolutely nothing 'romantic' at that scene at all.

"U-um..." Twin tails girl stammered, her green eyes looking down at the floor in embarrassment, "t-thank you for saving me... I-it was really my fault for not looking where I was going; I was being clumsy! I-it wasn't really because of your friend so, um... um... Please accept my apology!" A pause. Then, she squeaked, "I-I hope I said that right..."

"No problem," said Barnaby, smiling a winning smile. "It's all in a day's work for a her-"

And then, he stopped.

Something in the girl's words had struck a chord with him.

Her green eyes were... startlingly familiar.

He knew her.

He _knew _her.

"_I-I hope I said that right..."_

_"U-um, did I do that right?"_

And, at the exact same time- cliché though it may have been- Barnaby was sure she recognized him, too.

"Y-you're-"

"And you are..."

They spoke at the same time.

"Barnaby Brooks Junior?"

"Miku…?"

* * *

><p>Miku-Miku- or, foregoing her 'stage name' (which was pretty unimaginative), Hatsune Miku- turned out to be a very shy, somewhat socially awkward girl who couldn't look into Barnaby's eyes. Every time she lifted her head she squeaked like a hamster attached to a firework (not that Barnaby had first-hand knowledge of what that sounded like), and seemed to retreat even further into her stutteryspluttery shell of embarrassed 'thank you's and continuous bowing.

Barnaby wasn't the one Miku should have been thanking, though.

In a show of guilt, Kotetsu had- true to his nature- forced his help upon Miku, doing her grocery shopping alongside her and offering to pay.

It would have been a sweet gesture, had he not been rambling about her 'celebrity status' the whole time- firmly asserting he was her fan even though he couldn't actually remember her name.

Barnaby sighed. He presumed Kotetsu was trying to act on his earlier declaration that he would be Miku's number one fan to spite Hero TV's attempts to topple her- and maybe there was some (make that, a _lot_) of guilt thrown in there because he'd partially responsible when/if her career fell to pieces.

Like always, Kotetsu meant well, but his meddling nature was only getting in his way. His praise was making him look kind of creepy.

"O-once again, I'm really sorry to inconvenience you, B-barnaby!" the idol squeaked, bowing her head. Her movements were so jerky the fruit and vegetables very nearly spilt out over the top of her bag again, and Barnaby had to catch them for her before a repeat of the earlier incident occurred.

"Oh no! I'm sorry- really sorry!"

"Don't worry. It's alright," said Barnaby, with his best winning smile. "I'm used to helping people."

"Hauu..." Miku sighed dreamily. "Y-you're so cool... You're my favorite hero..."

Then, she paused, wincing slightly.

"D-did I say that out loud? T-that's so embarrassing! I-I didn't mean it; I'm sorry!"

And, still bowing profusely, she backed out of the shop, very nearly tripping over her own feet in the process.

She was like a perfectly concocted cocktail of face-melting adorable and just-turned-teen vulnerability and awkwardness; the perfect product of years upon years of cute singers and idols. She was so marketable it was _scary_- as if she'd been born to sell vegetable juice and sing inane songs.

Maybe she was a robot.

There was no way a girl that nauseating could be _real_, was there?

Barnaby didn't like her.

He didn't like her at all.

He didn't like her high-pitched voice, her wide eyes, her naïveté, her pretty face and he didn't like the fact Kotetsu seemed to care about her. There was nothing special about that idol girl; nothing special at all- except, perhaps, her clumsiness.

And that might have been a forced persona put upon her by her sponsors, anyway- just like Blue Rose's 'icy dominatrix' façade.

But, most of all, Barnaby _despised_ how, when Kotetsu had helped Miku, she completely ignored him. Kotetsu really poured his stupid heart out to people like that; rescuing balloons for small children and cats from trees for no points whatsoever- merely for the satisfaction of helping others.

Miku was throwing that help right back in his face.

It shouldn't have bothered Barnaby that much- but it did.

"Well, I'm used to being ignored anyway," said Kotetsu, trying to shrug the incident off. "It's not important. But still... that's the kid we're competing against? She's even littler than I thought she would be in real life! Now I'm starting to feel like a real monster..."

"Are you still talking about that?" Barnaby coldly, folding his arms. "It's not our problem. You can't right all the wrongs in this universe- but you could try and focus on the more important ones first."

"H-hey, that was pretty harsh. Are you alright, Bunny?"

"I'm fine. You're the one with a problem."

"Problem? I have a problem?"

"Yes. You need to get your priorities sorted out. There are more important things to worry about in Sternbild than whether a singer goes out of business."

"It'd be no loss if she did," the foul-tempered blonde at the counter chipped in. "She's a terrible singer. I hate her."

"Y-you know who she is? You were listening to our conversation?" asked Kotetsu, shocked.

Miss Blonde and Snarky rolled her eyes. "_Duh_. You're really loud, old man."

Kotetsu winced. "I'm tired of people telling me that."

"Plus, I had to keep an eye on you to make sure you didn't break anything else."

"And that, too…"

"Whatever." Blondie turned around, ponytail swishing. "At least you managed to do something right: you hurt a vacuous pop icon who makes me want to punch kittens. So, congratulations. Now get out."

Barnaby suddenly felt like he had found a kindred spirit in this bad tempered girl.

He wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.

Did he sound that rude when he talked to other people, too?

* * *

><p>"Well, let's look on the bright side! At least we managed to buy some food, right?" said Kotetsu, trying to be cheerful- which was quite a difficult feat when Barnaby Brooks Jr. was- for lack of a better description- having a temper tantrum.<p>

"You had to pay all those 'damage fines', though," said Barnaby dismissively. "God. Can't I take you _anywhere _without you breaking something?"

"Can you 'break' a vegetable?" Kotetsu mused out loud. "And _I_ was the one that took _you _shopping, actually."

"It comes to the same thing. You should count yourself lucky that you didn't hurt Miku when you smacked into her like that. It's bad enough when you bowl ordinary people over, but if you start disfiguring celebrities the fines will be a teensy bit more expensive."

"Yeah, I'd feel pretty guilty if I seriously hurt her... But I didn't, right? Her face looks exactly the same as before; still as cute as ever!" Kotetsu smiled brightly. "Cheer up, Bunny!"

"No."

"Aww, c'monnn. I'm just trying to look after you! Why are you in such a bad mood?"

Barnaby turned around, arms folded, and gave Kotetsu his best death glare.

He knew he was being childish, unreasonable, immature- but at that moment, he didn't really care. He didn't mind when Kotetsu showed affection to the other heroes- even though it did irk him somewhat when Karina looked at him in _that _certain way. But, as Barnaby had discovered, he did mind when Kotetsu showed affection towards a young girl he had never met before; a young girl who Barnaby constantly saw smiling brightly on billboards on the city.

He minded that quite a lot.

Seeing the so-called 'idol' in the flesh, without that turquoise hair (was it a wig?) or school girl themed outfit hadn't made his initial dislike of her diminish. Instead, it had increased; especially at the way Kotetsu had treated her.

"...If you can't figure out why I'm annoyed then you're even more useless than I thought."

It was unfair; Barnaby knew he was being unfair- but weren't all friendships, essentially, unfair and selfish in nature?

He was still tired, he had a headache, he'd suffered from a string of sleepless nights stuck between inappropriate daydreams of Kotetsu and fuzzy memories of eerily grinning murderers, and _now _he was insanely, completely unfoundedly jealous of one pint-sized fourteen year old girl just because Kotetsu thought she was cute.

Overall, it was a lot easier to blame Miku for his negative feelings instead of his messed up brain.

Or Kotetsu.

"I don't even want to talk to you anymore."

* * *

><p>Kotetsu groaned as he watched Barnaby stalking away from him. He wasn't sure how Barnaby managed it, but even his <em>back <em>looked menacing- giving off a definite 'don't follow me!' aura that made all in his path jump away as though they were heralding the Second Coming of Christ.

Then again, some of Barnaby's fans did seem to regard him as that. Many laughs had been had when Nathan showed the other heroes a couple of blogs about Barnaby he'd found. The best website by far had been that creepy one where the more rabid, vocal fans posted short stories about their smutty daydreams- in _excruciating_ detail- featuring Sternbild's favourite hero.

Kotetsu kind of wondered if Nathan himself had contributed to the huge amount of stories on that site, but he didn't ask.

It would have been funny had Barnaby not been so obviously disturbed by the whole matter Kotetsu began to feel guilty for laughing so hard.

Urgh…_ This_ was a different matter altogether, though.

What was up with Barnaby today? All Kotetsu had done was take him food shopping because he didn't want Barnaby to _die_. What was wrong with that?

Even after all this time, Kotetsu still had trouble understanding his partner.

Had he been meddling again...?

Maybe it would be best if he didn't talk to Barnaby for a few days- just to make sure he didn't upset Barnaby too much with his presence. Their partnership was very precious to Kotetsu and, although it was mostly firm, Barnaby's moods weren't always. It would be easy- far, far too easy- for Kotetsu to do or say something, completely stupid that he didn't really mean that could destroy everything given Barnaby's sudden mood.

If Barnaby had a problem, he could tackle it by himself.

That… was the right thing to do, wasn't it?

Wasn't it?

…Who knew?

Barnaby's head was a complete mystery. Before Kotetsu had gotten to know him, he'd seriously entertained fantasies the other man wasn't human, and had in fact come from the Andromeda Galaxy to make his life hell. Of course, he'd felt guilty for that belief after he'd learnt about Barnaby's past, but-

But…

_Damn._

Kotetsu's eyes had only just snagged on the numbers flashing on his watch.

_09:34._

_All thoughts of aliens and Andromeda fled from Kotetsu's mind._

He should have been at work half an hour ago.

Agnes was going to kill him.

And what on earth was he going to do with all those vegetables now?

* * *

><p>"Alright, get in there you damn stupid- H-hey! Are you trying to make me look like an idiot? Get back in fridge. No- back <strong>in<strong> the fridge! Stop that!"

_Slam._

_Thunk._

_**Crunch.**_

…Oops.

That didn't sound good.

Kotetsu groaned. He fell out of his crouching position, behind hitting the kitchen floor with an undignified _thump_, as he stared intently at the fridge. Now, this was a problem. He had to put the vegetables somewhere so they wouldn't spoil. The fridge in the Hero TV Headquarters was too small to store them all. What to do, what to do…?

Those vegetables were going in that fridge alright- it was just a question of _how…_

"You haven't beaten me yet…"

Rolling up his sleeves, Kotetsu gave the bag of vegetables a bitter glare. "I'll show you who's boss- just wait and see! You **will **get into that fridge whether you want to or not!"

_Slam._

_Thunk._

_**Crunch!**_

…Apparently, the vegetables did not want.

They did not want at all; not even after they'd been all squished up and mushed together into a strange green paste.

Kotetsu pouted.

"…I hate you."

The vegetables did not respond.

That was only to be expected, really.

* * *

><p>"Ooh, pudding!~ I can't wait to eat it!~ I was thinking about this all through my work out today! I'm so excited, hehe!"<p>

But Pao-Lin was in for a nasty shock.

When she opened the fridge, there was no pudding. Instead, a bag full of deformed vegetable slush fell out on top of her, splattering her tracksuit dark green.

She screamed.

"Where did my pudding go? What is this witchcraft?"

* * *

><p><strong>an: **Haha this was also a_ huge_ pain to write XD more than it should have been. *death glare* I had fun with the last two sections and all the banter near the start (I love writing banter, like, maybe too much XD Hence, TALKING. Never-ending talking XD) but the bit with Miku _killed_me. I mean, I don't want to give her too much of a spotlight given she's not actually a Tiger & Bunny character, but she is kind of important and gahhhh *flail*

Out of curiosity, I wonder how many people reading this are familiar with Vocaloid? If you are you probably figured out who the blonde girl was in the store was as well (because Tiger & Bunny doesn't have enough tsunderes in it at the moment rite? XD)

Aaah, I'm sorry it's so slow-moving and melodrama XD I always get more judgemental w/ my writing when doing multi-chapter stories though ._. Thank you very much for your comments/favs/alerts/etc ^_^;; I kind of love you all :3

**~renahhchen xoxoxo**


	7. Magnet

Vegetable Juice  
>o7: Magnet<p>

* * *

><p>Barnaby pushed his glasses up the bridge and sighed heavily.<p>

Truly, it was a sigh of long suffering.

He was supposed to be writing down witty responses to some interview questions. The interview was going to be filmed in a few days and he needed to have suitably charismatic, intelligent things to talk about, lest he steal Kotetsu's spotlight as the token bumbling idiot in their partnership.

Unfortunately, Barnaby was having trouble thinking of any responses at all, 'witty' or otherwise. Staring at the empty Microsoft word document wasn't helping. The vast expanse of white seemed to be mocking him.

His mind was completely empty.

Barnaby's fingers clenched into fists; scrunched up so tightly the knuckles turned white and crescent-shaped marks from his nails were left embedded in his palms. It didn't really hurt. His brain was too fried to register pain at that moment.

If his fingers weren't clenched into fists, he probably would've picked his computer and thrown it across the room.

…Well, he wouldn't have done, but he could still dream.

Barnaby might have been an adult, and- in most occasions- he might've acted like the responsible, mature one, but that didn't mean he wasn't prone to being incredibly childish at times, too.

Barnaby especially hated it when things didn't go his way.

Did that make him selfish?

The oh-so-marketable it _hurt_ face of Hatsune Miku flickered across his mind; the scene from the shop replaying in his mind once more.

Kotetsu had been so nice to her.

Why had he been nice to her?

Barnaby's teeth grit together.

He was _definitely_ selfish.

Barnaby had always been aloof, distant; placing himself on a pedestal of supposed perfection so high other people couldn't hope to reach him. They couldn't even brush him with their fingertips.

In time, they all stopped trying.

Even the members of his unofficial fan club at school gave up on him despair. It was blindingly obvious, even to the most devoted Barnaby Brooks Jr. fan girl, that he wasn't interested; not in girls, not in dating.

Not even in humanity.

The only people Barnaby had really, truly cared about were dead.

He said he did everything for his parents- but maybe that was a lie. After all, it was impossible to save a corpse.

He'd been doing it for himself all along- just to satisfy his desire for revenge; just so he could sleep a little easier at night.

Saving other people hadn't even factored into it.

He really was... a selfish human being after all.

No wonder Kotetsu hadn't liked him.

Hell, Barnaby didn't even like the person he'd been before- and, if he had the opportunity, he would've slapped that smug, self-righteous and oh-so-perfect brat across the face for acting like such a _martyr_; didn't he realize other people had problems, too?

He was only just beginning to learn the world didn't actually revolve around him- and at the age of twenty four, too. That was something most kids learnt when they were five or six.

Still, it was better late than never.

It was only now, as Barnaby reflected on his past, that he realized how pathetic his existence had been. He'd been stuck in the past, never going forwards- not changing, not developing; just staying the same, in stasis- completely unreachable, and glad of it, because he didn't want to be reached by anyone- too arrogant to realize they might have had important things to say.

Kotetsu had opened up his eyes.

What would have happened if he had never met him …?

Most likely, he'd still be the same completely unlikable person he'd been until a few months ago.

Slowly but surely, he was trying to teach himself how to be a real, fully functional human being again.

Barnaby had Kotetsu to thank for that.

Kotetsu was Barnaby's friend- his first friend in twenty years.

It should have ended there- but it didn't. The friendship with Kotetsu was rapidly spiralling out of Barnaby's control, until he hardly knew what he was feeling anymore. Barnaby felt so many things at once from the simplest of motions- every smile Kotetsu gave him, every time their fingers brushed- that he felt sick and shaky and nervous and he had to fight the urge to hold his head between his hands, because it kind of sort of felt like his skull was going to explode.

That friendship had, without his realizing, mutated into _something else_- just like a potato that had gone moldly and started to sprout tentacles.

Barnaby's feelings were completely alien to him.

He'd never been attracted to anybody before, male or female, and he didn't know what to _do_, or if he was even doing it right- or if he was even attracted to Kotetsu at all and he was having a huge panic attack over nothing. How did you know whether you 'liked' somebody in that way, anyway? Was there a definitive barrier where friendship ended and _everything else _began, or did the two blur over sometimes? What did he know about those 'other feelings', anyway? He had no idea how to communicate with people- hell, for the longest of times, he'd thought he was completely incapable of feeling attracted to anybody at all, full stop.

Barnaby was so afraid of his own feelings he didn't even want to try and examine them. They'd only make everything awkward, uncomfortable.

Barnaby had _liked _having a (semi) normal relationship with another human being because it had made _him_ feel relatively normal, too. He had enjoyed being by Kotetsu's side; rolling his eyes at his stupid jokes, teasing him when he said stupid things, listening to his stupid stories about Kaede and glitter pens- imagining that, finally, he was part of a real family again.

What if his messed-up alien-potato-esque feelings screwed everything up? What if it made everything change?

Barnaby wasn't so useless as to fall in love with Kotetsu simply because he was the first person he had really bonded with in twenty years, was he?

That was just embarrassing.

Was he… trying to force himself into imagining he was in love because he'd never been in love before and he wanted to feel 'normal'?

What on earth was he feeling, anyway?

_Stupid. You're so stupid._

It was something Barnaby had been telling himself a lot lately.

Spending time in Kotetsu's company was too confusing.

It made his head hurt.

His heart hurt even worse.

* * *

><p>"Hey, you're late!"<p>

"I know!" said Miku humbly, voice higher than usual from nerves, as she bowed her head. Her brown pigtails bounced at the slight movement. "I'm sorry- I'm honestly, truly sorry! I-it's just, something happened, which led to some other things, a-and..."

"I don't wanna hear your excuses, Miss Turquoise Twintails! You're meant to be our company's star idol- it looks bad when you show up to work late! For your insubordination, I'm gonna deduct you fifteen Rin favor points!"

"I-I'm sorry, I'm sorry! P-please don't hate me! I-I was going to come here earlier, really, but when I was shopping some things happened a-and-"

"Idiot."

"H-huh?"

Miku turned her head, eyes wide.

There, seated on the couch before her, were her two fellow idols, Kagamine Rin and Kagamine Len. The fourteen year old twins were employed by the same company as she, yet they had yet to debut yet. The success of their future careers hinged solely on Miku's CD sales, which- understandably- put a lot of pressure on the young girl to do her best.

She didn't want to let anybody down.

"Why are you apologizing to Rin?" asked Len, rolling his eyes. "She's not your boss. Don't give her the satisfaction of thinking she's more important than she is; she already has a swelled head."

"A-ah, don't say mean things about Rin, she's my friend..."

"That's right, uhuhu~" Rin cackled. "I'm Miku's _friend_. You're so mean, Len-Len."

"Don't call me that."

"Lenners."

"Or that."

"Lenny~"

"Right. You know what? Just don't talk to me _at all_."

Rin pouted, prodding her super-serious brother in the side. "Humph. Meanie-face."

"I-I'm really sorry I'm late all the same!" said Miku. Her face was flushed, hair messy, breathing labored. It was obvious she'd been running. "I-is Producer mad at me?"

"Oh yeah," said Rin, smirking. "Mei-Mei was _livid_."

Miku jumped as though she'd been pricked with a pin. "Aieee! N-no way! I-I need to find her and apologize! I-I know I might not be able to make up the time I've lost, but-"

"Miku, sit down," said Len tiredly, pinching the bridge of his nose in irritation. "You were only five minutes late. Meiko hasn't even noticed you're gone yet."

"Yeah, uhuhu. She was sat in her office with her head on her desk," said Rin. "I think she has a hangover or something."

Miku's rapid heartbeat quietened a little at this reassurance. "O-oh... That's okay then... W-well..." she hastily corrected herself, "O-obviously it's not okay that Producer got sick, and I hope she gets well soon, but I'm glad she's not angry with me... She's kind of scary when she's angry, a-and I don't want to disappoint anyone..."

Len sighed. "Honestly, Miku, you've got to learn to start ignoring the things Rin says. You're so gullible. Sometimes, I worry about you."

Miku smiled sheepishly, taking a seat in between Rin and Len. She knew from experience it was best the split the pair up as much as possible, or they would have seriously tried to kill each other. How they managed to live under the same roof as each other was a mystery.

"So, Miku-Miku," said Rin brightly, throwing her magazine down on the table, "what happened? Care to share the epic story of why you're so terribly, horribly, late by FIVE whole minutes?"

"U-um, well..."

"It better be good. If it doesn't have pirates in it somewhere I'm sooo not interested."

"Ahaha, t-that's a little unrealistic... H-how many pirates have you ever seen in Sternbild, Rin?"

"Meh." Rin pouted; her lower lip jutting out. "You have to spoil my awesome-epic fantasies with reality, don't'cha? Tell me there was some crazy mind-control murderer type NEXT in your tale, though? There has to a murderous NEXT, right, right?"

"Why are things only interesting to you if they have a high body count?" asked Len, rolling his eyes. "You're such a sadist."

"Fufufu, thanks~"

"That wasn't a compliment. That was a scathing psychoanalysis of your character," said Len stiffly. "I think you've got a serious problem."

"D-don't be harsh on Rin, Len! Rin... has it half right!" said Miku, loyally trying to defend her friend, for some reason. "I did run into a NEXT... T-two of them, actually- and when I say 'run', I mean it literally... But... they weren't murderous. Not at all."

"Two NEXT?" Rin arched a brow. "How could you tell? Who were they?"

"You might not believe this but... but..." Miku smiled shyly, her fingers tugging at one of her pigtails. "I-it was... Barnaby Brooks Jr. and Wild Tiger!"

The resultant shriek from Rin was so loud it nearly brought the building down.

"EH? You met _Barnaby_?"

Rin had, quite unfortunately, forgotten her very hungover, very short-tempered manager was sat next door- but she soon remembered when Meiko shouted a string of abuse at her that involved hammering nails into every joint of each of her fingers and feasting on her internal organs.

Miku laughed nervously. "U-um, Producer sounds cheerful this morning...?"

"Oh, never mind her," said Rin, leaning forwards with wide eyes. "You say you met Barnaby? _The _Barnaby?"

"A-and Wild Tiger, too..."

"Pshhh." Rin rolled her eyes. "Who cares about him? He's like, what, sixty?"

"O-only thirty-five or so..."

"Which is basically ancient. I only care about Barnaby!~ Did you see him in that photo shoot from, like, last August? Aaaa, when he was wearing that swimwear- ooooh~" Rin giggled, fanning herself with her magazine. "I-It was so hot I thought I was gonna melt!~ Aaaahh, it was like 'take me now, great God Barnaby!'~"

"Like you have a chance anyway," said Len dismissively. "You're only fourteen. That's _illegal_."

"Eh?~ Don't pour cold water on my burning passions, Len-Len! A girl can dream, can't she?~ Uhuhuhu..." Rin sighed dreamily, fingers curling round the magazine. "And if the law frowns upon my pure, maidenly love of him, then I can just murder him and take his corpse home with me…"

Len deadpanned. "That's even worse. Geez; I wasn't joking when I said you have a problem."

Rin giggled. "It's just a joke. You're so uptight. Anyway, Miku-Miku. Was Barnaby that gorgeous in real life?"

"W-well..." Miku flushed slightly- embarrassed at being put on the spot. "He was nice, I guess... I fell over, and he helped me up..."

"N-no way! Aaaah, that's not fair! I want Barnaby to touch me, too! I'd never take a bath again!"

"B-but, you know..." Miku smiled shyly, her face turning pink. "Wild Tiger was... really cool, too..."

"Eh? Tiger?" Rin pulled a face. "You mean you met _Barnaby Brooks Jr. _and you were staring at _Wild Tiger_? Are you actually stupid?"

"N-no! T-tiger's really cool, really- give him a chance! He bumped into me-"

"Living up to his title of 'Crusher for Justice' even off the job, huh?"

"L-let me finish! He bumped into me, but he was really apologetic, a-and he paid for all the stuff he damaged, n-not to mention he bought replacement food for me! H-he was... really sweet..." Miku sighed dreamily at the memory. "H-he was so cool... And he said... h-he said he was my biggest fan! E-even if he did get my name wrong, ahaha..."

"Huh. That's creepy. He sounds like a pervert to me."

"That's not true!"

"Um, yeah it is. What sixty year old man-"

"O-only thirty-five!"

"- would listen to an adorable little idol like yourself? Obviously, a pervert. It's elementary- right, Len?"

"Don't drag me into this; I couldn't care less."

"But aren't you worried about Miku-Miku's mental health? I mean, to get all dreamy and wide-eyed over _Wild Tiger..._"

"Miku can like whatever celebrity she wants. It's her choice."

Miku smiled at Len gratefully. "T-thank you... B-but, it's really useless... I-I've wanted to meet Wild Tiger for so long- b-but when I finally did I, I... I..." She wailed in agony, burying her head in her hands. "I-I got so embarrassed I couldn't think of anything to say! I-I must have looked so stupid..."

Rin looked at her friend's despairing form. Miku trembling like a plate of jelly, with a bright red face, tears beading in the corners of her eyes.

Wow. She really had it _bad_. Rin hadn't even known Miku was a Wild Tiger fan until today.

"Hey. Miku-Miku. Cheer up."

"W-what?" Miku asked, sniffing, as she lifted her head out of her hands. "W-what is it, Rin?"

Rin smiled brightly. "I'm sure you'll get a chance to talk to Wild Tiger again. In fact, I _guarantee_ it!"

"G-guarantee?" Miku's eyes widened. "D-do you know something I don't...?"

Rin giggled and tapped her nose in a knowing manner. "Uhuhu~ Mayyyyybe."

When Len spoke, his voice was warning. "Rin. You promised Meiko you wouldn't tell."

"Of course I won't- but one little hiiiinttt won't hurt, riiiight?"

"W-what won't you tell me? What are you hiding from me? W-when will I get to see Wild Tiger again?"

"Patience, my dear little cupcake," said Rin, patting Miku on the head. "All good things come to those who wait, yes?"

"B-but..."

Smiling like a cat who'd got the cream, Rin flipped open her glossy magazine to the right page, then shoved it Miku's face.

"Until that time comes, you can always look at this, right?"

"H-huh?"

Miku looked down at the magazine that had been thrust into her hands- and her face turned bright red.

I-it was Barnaby and Wild Tiger, both posing together... a-and Wild Tiger was wearing a pair of kitty ears!

"R-r-rin..." Miku stuttered, fingers shaking, as she held the magazine against her face, "I-I think I'm in love..."

* * *

><p>"Huh? What do you mean, they're fighting?"<p>

"Well, I'm not really sure, but-"

"Ivan, this is important. My pudding is on the line here- not to mention the love and happiness of two of my friends," said Pao-Lin, tugging gently at Ivan's sleeve in distress. "What did you see?"

Ivan sighed.

He really needed to keep his mouth shut around Pao-Lin. That girl was like a dog with a bone when she caught onto any fact, no matter how small, about Kotetsu's and Barnaby's partnership- and whilst Ivan understood her interest in it, he wasn't 100% sure (or even 50%) that she was helping matters by prying into them.

Keeping his mouth closed around Pao-Lin was a problem, though. Whenever Ivan saw her he was struck with the sudden desire to say something, _anything_- hopefully something cool and funny- that would make her smile.

Unfortunately, Ivan didn't have many 'cool' or 'funny' things to say- or at least, not things a person who wasn't completely obsessed with collecting manga or Japanese tea ceremony would appreciate.

In other words, nobody cared about what Ivan had to say. Even compared to somebody like Kotetsu, who wore Mr. Legend socks at the age of thirty-something, Ivan knew he was a geek.

And that wasn't even the worst of the problem.

_Talk_ to Pao-Lin?

Ha.

He'd have as much luck flying to the moon.

Despite her hatred of dresses Pao-Lin was a real, _actual_ girl, and Ivan couldn't talk to girls very well; not to mention girls he wanted to impress, girls he really liked.

And Ivan did like Pao-Lin.

He liked her a lot.

His heartbeat sped up and went all _doki doki_ whenever he saw her, his fingers trembled, and all intelligent thought flew out of his head the moment her eyes met his. He felt simultaneously hot and cold at the same time, as though he were being pricked with one thousand needles, and the first time that reaction happened Ivan had _literally_ fallen out of his chair.

Sometimes Ivan thought his brain was actively trying to sabotage him whenever he saw Pao-Lin.

Instead of saying cool or funny things, Ivan could only babble inanely whenever he saw her before, sighing with defeat, his head fell into his hands and his cheeks turned bright red.

That was how he'd ended up telling her- both this time, and the time before.

In a desperate attempt to get Pao-Lin's attention he'd blabbed; divluging information about Kotetsu and Barnaby without really thinking about it.

Now, he was regretting it.

At least she was paying attention to him now, though.

It wouldn't last.

"W-well..." Ivan's fingers threaded together and he looked down at the floor. "I, um, was sat here when Kotetsu walked in a few moments ago and, um... He didn't look very happy. H-he was..."

"What? What, what, what?"

Pao-Lin leant forwards, eyes eerily wide, and took hold of Ivan's shoulders. The moment her fingers brushed against his skin he started- body prickling, as though electricity was sparking underneath his flesh. Given Pao-Lin's powers, that might have been literal, too.

Pao-Lin's mastery over electricity didn't quite explain the butterflies that were flapping around in Ivan's stomach, however.

"W-well... Kotetsu didn't realize I was there..." Then again, nobody did. "A-and I think he was kinda upset..."

"Upset? _Kotetsu_?"

"Yeah. H-he was trying to get those vegetables into the fridge, and he was hitting them pretty hard, a-and... I-I don't know if he noticed, but he was muttering under his breath."

"Uuu. The plot thickens- but Pao-Lin, master detective, can solve it!" said Pao-Lin, her eyes shining with excitement. She looked so cute when that happened it should have been illegal. "What was he saying? Did you hear?"

"U-um, yeah... Bits and pieces..."

"Like?"

Ivan was reluctant to say- but one look into Pao-Lin's eyes, and he was gone. Completely gone.

He would have done any stupid thing she asked him too, because he cared about her that much.

"He said something about Barnaby, like..." Doing his best Kotetsu impression (which was, of course, impeccable), Ivan echoed Kotetsu's words from earlier during his spat with the vegetables, "'Damn Bunny... I don't get that kid sometimes. I buy these for him, and then he ignores me? Damn it...'"

Pao-Lin stared.

Then, she squealed.

"So it's true! They really _are _having a fight! I have to tell Nathan at once!"

"W-well, um, they always have fights- maybe you shouldn't get involved...?"

"What, and let those two morons screw everything up 'cause Bunny's about as good at talking to people as a rock and the old man is as perceptive as a snail in a coma? No way. Absolutely no way!" Pao-Lin smiled softly, running her hands through her hair. "I care about those two too much to let them sort out their own problems."

"...You know, you're beginning to sound a lot like Kotetsu."

Pao-Lin giggled. "You really think so? But _you're _the one who does the best impersonations."

Then, moving so quickly Ivan barely had time to register it was happening, Pao-Lin leant forwards-

And pressed a light kiss on Ivan's cheek.

"Thank you for helping. I'll see you around, 'kay?"

Ivan could only watch Pao-Lin's retreating back as, slowly, tremulously, his fingers pressed against the side of his face.

He knew he was blushing.

* * *

><p>Doing the whole 'not talking to Barnaby' thing was difficult; way more difficult than Kotetsu had ever imagined it would be.<p>

He was just unaccustomed with trying to keep out of people's business, that was all…

At least, he thought that was all it was.

Even so, Kotetsu had never expected, not in a million years, how hard to it would be to avoid Barnaby- resisting the urge to make comments about his hair, or telling him terrible jokes, or even just telling him to cheer up because, quite honestly, Barnaby looked _miserable_.

The last time Kotetsu had seen Barnaby that upset, it had been when he was standing on the roof of that ruined building, crying- actually _crying_- because he thought he was going to be defeated by Jake; he'd never be able to avenge his parents.

It had taken Kotetsu a while to get over that.

Barnaby could actually _cry_. He wasn't some infallible, cold, calculating robot after all; he was a human, too.

A human with more problems than most.

That moment had opened his eyes.

Kotetsu wanted to comfort Barnaby now as he had done then- but he was afraid to try. He didn't know what was wrong with Barnaby, or why he was acting so strangely, but he had a funny feeling any attempt to cheer him up would only make matters worse.

As always, Barnaby was impossible to understand.

Kotetsu could only watch Barnaby out of the corner of his eye and hope he was doing the right thing by not interfering.

* * *

><p>Kotetsu was about as subtle as an elephant.<p>

Painted pink.

_Dancing._

That stupid idiot probably thought he was being oh-so-suave with his attempts to avoid Barnaby, but the other heroes could tell what was going on in nanoseconds; even those who weren't privy to the knowledge Ivan, Pao-Lin and now Nathan possessed.

It was plainly obvious they were having some kind of fight.

Usually Barnaby and Kotetsu spent all their time together, having silly arguments about this and that nobody else could understand. Now, however, they were sat at opposite ends of the room; Barnaby staring blankly at his laptop, and Kotetsu pretending to read. He wasn't pretending very hard, given he was holding the newspaper upside down.

Their frosty attitude had made the atmosphere drop in the room by about fifty degrees. Even Karina looked somewhat unsettled.

"It's a nice day today, isn't it, Barnaby?" said Keith hopefully- trying to break the tension.

There was no response.

Poor Keith flinched, as though he'd just been kicked in the stomach.

That was the moment that Pao-Lin decided she needed to step in and knock some sense into the two bickering idiots. Nobody made Keith Goodman _unhappy _and got away with it- that was just _wrong_.

Making Keith sad was like punching cute, fluffy kittens in the face.

"You know, I got a huge surprise today," said Pao-Lin lightly, tones conversational. "I opened the fridge and saw my pudding had magically turned into a pile of vegetables. I think a witch did it."

At least _that _got a rise out of Barnaby.

"Vegetables...?"

"Yeah. At first I assumed Karina was on a stupid diet again and had thrown all our food out, like last time-"

"M-my diets aren't _stupid_!"

"My, you worry about your figure too much," said Nathan, in a strangely paternal manner. "You look just _fine _as it is, honey."

"Y-yeah, but I... I..."

"Tiger won't like you more the skinnier you get; it's not proportional," Nathan said quietly, whispering into Karina's ear so nobody else could hear. "He's completely dense, you know- he'll only fuss about your wellbeing."

Karina's face flushed. "That has nothing to do with anything! I don't know what you're talking about!"

"My, the pains we women have to go through for love, hm?"

"Shut up!"

Pao-Lin giggled; catching the latter part of that exchange thanks to Karina's high-pitched shouting.

Karina was so transparent about her feelings, it was kind of difficult overlaying the image of Karina Lyle, easily embarrassed high school girl in love, on top of her stage persona of Blue Rose, the cold and icy dominatrix. Karina's face would turn red and explode if she had to do any of the stuff her legions of creepy old fans speculated she did.

"Well, any~way, I noticed the fridge had been populated with veggies, and I was all 'oh no, what's this? What happened to my pudding? Aaah- this is so terrible I could die!' But I didn't die, of course."

"Of course," Barnaby said, glaring at Kotetsu.

"H-hey..." Kotetsu laughed nervously. "Why are you looking at me like that, Bunny?"

"Oh, no reason. I think I know who the culprit of your story is, Pao-Lin- and I doubt it's a witch- but I'll let you continue."

Pao-Lin had to resist the urge to 'squee' at that interaction between Kotetsu and Barnaby. Finally, they were looking at each other again- and, better yet, they'd already gone back to bickering like a married couple! She'd barely said three words, and the tension between them was already beginning to defrost.

If that wasn't proof they simply couldn't be apart from each other, then she didn't know what was.

Pao-Lin didn't know when it had started exactly but, somewhere down the line, Barnaby and Kotetsu's vitriolic relationship had became a staple of her normal life; just like automatically sliding her flower hairclip into her bangs in the morning or eating rice for breakfast. Without their near constant bickering, everything felt _weird_, unsettled, completely off-balance.

And if_ she_ thought it was weird, she could hardly even begin to imagine how confusing the dispute must've been for the two who were actually involved.

What idiots.

"Wellllp," said Pao-Lin, smiling sweetly, "my pudding got magicked into veggies or something, and I was so depressed! I'm a growing girl- I need a daily boost of sugar to stay _alive_! But then I was told by, ahh, a very _reliable _source that the evil plot to health-ify the world was committed by..."

Pao-Lin looked about the assembled heroes, hands on her hips.

Then, she stabbed a finger in Kotetsu's direction.

"_You_!"

"...Me?"

"Yes. C'est _tu.__"_

_"C'est… moi…?" Kotetsu asked, with such an awkward accent even Barnaby's lips twitched slightly in a smile. "Why are we speaking in French all of a sudden? Have you been talking to Agnes?"_

_"Oui!~" said Pao-Lin, beaming._

_"I'm surprised you even knew that was French at all, Kotetsu," Barnaby said, flipping a few strands of hair out of his face oh-so-arrogantly. "You're not the most intelligent person in the world."_

_"No, and you're not the most endearing."_

_"Well, anyway, that's not important! I want you to get rid of those vegetables, please, Ko~tet~suuu~_ They're taking up precious pudding space!"

"Ahaha, I'm sorry about that. Really, really- but you've got to pity the poor vegetables, right? I mean, they have nowhere else to go!"

"They can't stay here. I absolutely refuse to let them stay here!"

"'Absolutely refuse'? Man, you're starting to get kind of haughty," said Kotetsu, smiling. "I guess you're becoming a real teenager, huh?"

"Pao-Lin has been an adorable teenager for a good while, silly Tiger~" Nathan chastised. "Haven't you noticed how beautiful she is? Look at those curves!~ Of course, they're not quite as nice as mine, but a girl can always dream, fufufu~"

At the mention of Pao-Lin's 'curves' (or lack of thereof) Ivan's face turned an interesting shade of pink, and he bowed his head. Pao-Lin only smiled, striking a pose; a peace sign, just like the numerous pictures of Kaede Kotetsu had stored in his photo album at home.

"W-well, I can't really comment on your appearance like that... I'd feel kind of sleazy," Kotetsu said good-naturedly, still smiling. "Guess that comes from having a young daughter. Sorry. I think you should be fishing for compliments from guys your own age- like Ivan!"

"W-what, me?"

"Don't worry- I intend to do that!~ Hehe~"

Judging by the blush on Ivan's face (a stark contrast against his pale skin and white hair), the poor boy was having some sort of mental meltdown. If he had been an anime character, a large '!' would have appeared over his head- or maybe some steam.

Barnaby's reaction to Kotetsu's words was very _interesting_, too. His eyes had widened just a little, his lips parted in a small 'o'- and Pao-Lin had to resist the urge to squish his cheeks together and coo over how cute he looked.

It looked as if Barnaby had suddenly had an epiphany.

Aaahh, between Ivan and Barnaby, the cuteness levels in the room were getting dangerously high!

Pao-Lin could never compete with adorable faces like _that_.

"So, about the vegetables. You're gonna remove them, right?" Pao-Lin asked.

"Well, I don't know about that... I don't want them to go to waste."

"Don't be so bossy, Dragon Kid," said Karina. "Maybe Tiger bought us those vegetables because certain people- and I won't name names- eat far too much unhealthy food. I'm sure he's just looking out for our health."

Pao-Lin giggled. "You think way too highly of the old man, Blue Rose."

"T-that's not true!"

Great. Now _Karina_ was blushing as well.

Pao-Lin was beginning to feel a little out of the loop.

Kotetsu shook his head, a bemused expression flickering across his face. "Ah, no, you see, those weren't for everybody, to be honest... They were for Bunny."

Nathan's eyes lit up like fireworks. Clasping his hands to his chest, he cried- almost on the point of swooning- "You're actually buying food for Handsome now?"

"W-well, me and Bunny were together, so..."

"Ooh, _together_?"

"Nihi~ You mean you go food shopping together? You're just like a married couple!"

"Next you'll be picking out curtains out together! Oh, Tiger, I always knew you were the cute domestic type! I'm a little jealous of Handsome now, fufu~"

It was Kotetsu's turn to be embarrassed now. With another awkward laugh that was way too loud to be natural (then again, Kotetsu was always pretty loud with everything he did), he said, "Ahaha, I think you're getting a little carried away there. It's not like, really..."

"It's _definitely_ not," Barnaby said, voice icy. "I would rather have something sharp stabbed through my eyes _repeatedly_ than be in a... relationship... with that old man."

Karina looked a little smugger after hearing that.

Kotetsu didn't.

"Ahh, now you're making me sound like a cradle robber, Lil' Bunny!"

"You make _yourself _sound like one by giving me such an embarrassing nickname, and trying to 'help' me all the time when I don't want you to, and following me all the time, and... a-and..."

But Barnaby was unable to finish. His voice trailed off into a string of ellipses; drifting off into silence. He looked down at his lap, fingers coiling together, teeth resting on his lower lip in agitation.

Ha. To think, after only a handful of months, Kotetsu would have completely thawed out the 'Ice Prince'! When Pao-Lin first laid eyes on Barnaby she'd never believed, not even for a second, he'd have side like this to him.

Barnaby's distress was obvious even to Kotetsu.

"Hey, Bunny, what's wrong? Did I upset you somehow...?"

"You _always_ upset me."

"Ihihi, yeah..." Kotetsu smiled sheepishly. "It's one of my special talents. You're _very _easy to annoy, though, Bunny."

"You never would have thought Handsome was so temperamental, would you?~ I mean, he acts so _macho _most of the time, but-"

The glare Barnaby shot at Nathan was venomous enough to bite through metal.

"I don't understand why we're discussing this. Kotetsu, just throw the vegetables out. Then everybody will be happy, right?"

"_I _won't be happy."

"And why's that?"

"It's because I bought all that food for _you_, silly. I don't want it to go to waste." Kotetsu smiled a winning smile, giving Barnaby a goofy thumbs up. "I really, really don't want you to die on me. Our partnership would kinda go down the drain if I had to lug a corpse around with me all the time, all because _you _won't eat anything of nutritional worth!"

"Well, I dunno. It has a certain appeal to it," said Pao-Lin, giggling. "You and Bunny could be the first human/zombie tag team partnership! I think that would be kind of neat!"

"Neat..." Ivan muttered under his breath. His eyes sparked, as though he'd just been hit with an Excellent Idea (with caps lock, no less). "That sounds like a pretty awesome plot for a manga..."

And then the young blond uncapped a pen that had been in his pocket, and began to jot impeccably neat notes down on his hand.

Barnaby, meanwhile, was scowling- but the scowl had got lost in transition somewhere and had, instead, morphed into a rather more adorable and rather less menacing pout.

"I'm not going to die; honestly. You should worry about yourself more, old man- you're always the one who gets injured when we're fighting because you're so clumsy."

"I don't to worry about little things like that. I have you to do it for me." A smile. "I know you care really, Bunny."

Kotetsu's voice was so earnest Barnaby didn't have a response; rare, for him.

"If you really don't want the vegetables I'll take them home myself. I don't want to force my friendship on you or anything," said Kotetsu. He smiled proudly. "See? I have learned _some _things about not being too pushy, right? Kaede was lecturing me about it a while ago, saying I'm annoying and stuff, so I thought... maybe I should be more considerate of other people's feelings... So, I'm sorry if I bothered you by following you around too much back then, Bunny. Really."

Barnaby looked so taken aback it was kind of priceless. Pao-Lin wished she had a camera. A decent picture of Barnaby's flushed, open-mouthed expression would've sold for millions.

"K-kotetsu..."

Kotetsu grinned, stabbing himself in the chest with his thumb. "Ihihi~ See; I sounded pretty cool just now, didn't I? I bet Kaede would call me 'cool' if she saw me!"

"...And, like usual, you go and say something stupid to spoil everything," said Barnaby. "I feel sorry for your daughter, having such an embarrassing dad."

"H-hey, Bunny! That was below the belt!"

"You were asking for it, though."

Barnaby frowned- but the other heroes all knew better. That wasn't a real frown.

He was trying not to smile instead.

"But… I don't think you should throw all that food away," Barnaby said slowly, begrudgingly. "You did buy it for me... so..."

"Huh?" Kotetsu leant forwards, eyes wide, as a silly smile began to bloom on his lips. "Are you saying you'll accept the vegetables, Bunny, and hold them to your bosom and care for them as your own!"

Once more, Barnaby's expression contorted into something that was completely priceless.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about! Don't read into things too much... I don't think you'd do anything with vegetables like that given you'd only smother them in mayonnaise or use them in fried rice, so I'd make better use of them than you. I don't like it when people waste money."

"But, Bunny, you can cook even less than I can!"

"I can always learn. I'm not incompetent like you."

"Ngh... 'Incompetent'? You little brat..."

"Stupid old man."

Pao-Lin watched Barnaby and Kotetsu's argument with a wide smile on her face.

It looked like the natural order had been restored once more.

Those two were magnets, seriously. Opposites really did attract- and they just couldn't keep away from each other. Not even for a day. Not even for a whole hour.

Pao-Lin turned to look at Nathan, giving him a thumbs up.

It looked like this little argument was well and truly over.

But what of the fate of her pudding...?

"Oh yeah. I kind of had to get rid of that when I was putting the vegetables in there 'cause they wouldn't fit otherwise. You don't mind, do you, Pao-Lin?" asked Kotetsu, insensitive as always.

Pao-Lin gave a small squeak, as a doom chord played itself inside her head.

Dark...

Everything was suddenly swallowed with darkness.

"Y-you... got rid of my pudding?"

"Yeah. It was delicious! You have good taste."

Pao-Lin felt the world crumble from underneath her.

"H-hey, Dragon Kid? Are you alright?" asked Kotetsu worriedly. "I'll buy you another pudding some other time, okay? D-don't look at me like that- you're making me feel guilty! D-dragon Kid, you- _ow!_"

But it was too late.

Pao-Lin had already kicked Kotetsu in the shin.

That was probably going to leave a bruise…

* * *

><p>That evening found Kotetsu and Barnaby walking companionably down the street, holding a bag of vegetables each. The plastic carrier bags made slight rustling noises as the wind gently bumped them together. They were so close together their shadows on the pavement had actually merged into one.<p>

Barnaby had to fight to keep the blush off his face, whilst his thoughts meandered down dangerous roads. Here they were, after an 'argument' (only it was so short-lived it didn't really deserve to be called as such), standing that close together- both of them going back to Barnaby's flat to put away their shopping.

Maybe Nathan had been right.

The current scene was so disgustingly domestic Barnaby honestly felt a little embarassed.

And yet, at the same time, too... he was enjoying himself.

When did spending time with Kotetsu stop being a chore and, instead, became something fun? Even when they were arguing pointlessly, it was still strangely, somehow, fun.

Barnaby wasn't really accustomed to having fun. He was never sure he was doing it right.

"So, I'm kind of curious..."

"Curiosity killed the cat," said Barnaby dryly. "And tigers are just big cats, after all."

"Aha, that sounded kind of ominous. Don't kill me, Bunny!"

Barnaby raised a brow. "I have no intention of killing you."

"I guess that's for the best, really… A rabbit could never take down a tiger!"

"I've told you and told you, I'm not-"

"Then again, rabbits can be pretty dangerous," Kotetsu continued, happily oblivious to Barnaby's irritation- or maybe he just didn't care. "They bite your fingers when you try to feed them, and sometimes they get all pissy and run away from you for ages. Sound like anybody we know, huh, Bunny?"

"…I'm not going to dignify that with an answer."

"Heh~ You're no ordinary rabbit, though, Bunny," said Kotetsu, grinning. "Just like that one from that movie… Hm. Haven't you seen _Monty Python and the Holy Grail_?"

"No."

"What?" Kotetsu's eyes widened comically. "Then you haven't lived! You're like some weird recluse, Bunny, I swear- listening to and actually_ liking_ _opera__-_"

"It's a very refined pastime- not that you'd know anything about that."

"-but you've never even seen a decent movie before? Ha- and you call **me** an old man? That's a case of the pot calling the black, don't you think?"

"Technically, you a_re_ older than me."

Kotetsu sighed theatrically, placing his free hand on his chest. "Yep, but I'm younger in heart and spirit! At least I don't talk about Russian literature or _The Messiah _for hours on end. Despite all your explanations about how Handel's music is a work of genius, I happen to find some old guy singing about dead people for eleven minutes- that song was a whole _eleven minutes long_- kind of weird."

Barnaby sighed. "You really are the place where intelligence goes to die, aren't you?"

"And you_ really _do have a very odd way of complimenting people."

"It wasn't a compliment."

"Yeah, but I know you didn't mean it~"

Kotetsu's teasing tones made Barnaby shiver. Was he really that easy to see through? He had to change the subject; fast.

"Anyway…" Barnaby said slowly, searching desperately for a suitable change in topic, "what… were you talking about earlier, before we got sidetracked by your shocking ignorance?"

"And your disrespect for your elders," Kotetsu said, smiling. "Ahhh... You made me forget my train of thought."

"I'm not surprised, given your age."

"Umm- no, wait, I remember now!"

"Hooray."

Kotetsu said, "Don't say things like that in such a deadpan way, it's creepy." He grinned. "Well, I was going to ask... and I apologize if this is out of line or... whatever, but... why did you get so angry with me earlier?" Kotetsu smiled sheepishly, looking down at the floor. "Maybe I was treating you like a child, worrying about your diet and stuff- but that's just the way I am, you know? And, for what it's worth, I don't see you as a kid at all- even if you can be even more stubborn than Kaede at times, ahaha... I'm just used to fussing over people- but if you don't like, I can... try and stop? Maybe? I realize you're an adult and everything, I always have done, so... Aha…" Nervous laughter; Kotetsu broke off and rubbed the back of his head. "Um, I-I don't really know what I'm trying to say anymore..."

"Old man. You're babbling."

"I know that! I'm not too good at putting my thoughts down in words!"

"Yeah... It's obvious. Especially during interviews."

Barnaby tried to frown- he really did.

But he couldn't.

Not after hearing Kotetsu's words.

His lips quirked upwards into a small, hardly-there, but incredibly soft and sincere smile. It was a lot more truthful than the smiles Barnaby threw away for free during photo shoots- and it was so warm, so unguarded, it seemed to hit Kotetsu's heart in a very bizarre way.

"Y-you better not pull faces like to the general public," Kotetsu said, voice a little too loud, as he tried to squash the flutterings down in his stomach with a light-hearted joke. "You could take over the world with a pretty face like that!"

"Pretty...? I'm not."

"Handsome, then."

Barnaby's face flushed light pink. "Don't you start calling me that as well. It's bad enough when Fire Emblem does it."

"Of course I won't~ Don't worry." Beaming, Kotetsu ruffled Barnaby's hair- something that was rapidly becoming a habit (not that Barnaby really minded). "You'll always be Lil' Bunny to me."

That casual statement really shouldn't have made Barnaby feel as light-headed as it did.

His BPM must've been through the roof.

Why… was he trembling…?

When Barnaby rebuked Kotetsu over using that 'stupid name', he was still smiling to himself- obvious he didn't mean a single word.

"So, you actually realize I'm an adult, and yet you're still telling me what to eat and how to dress and calling me embarrassing nicknames? You're sending out mixed signals there."

"Hey, at least I'm _consistent_! You're all cold and aloof one minute then nice and friendly the next, and I never know how you're going to act! Sometimes I feel like I'm going to get whiplash because of your sudden mood swings, ihihi~"

Barnaby didn't comment. Instead, he only smiled.

He had been worrying for some time whether Kotetsu saw him on the same level as Pao-Lin or Karina- but, apparently not...

If Kotetsu recognized he was an adult, then maybe... he could recognize Barnaby's feelings, too.

Once more, Kotetsu's words from earlier echoed through Barnaby's mind; words that had pulled him out of his foul mood as though it had never even happened- '_W-well, I can't really comment on your appearance like that... I'd feel kind of sleazy. Guess that comes from having a young daughter_.'

If that was how Kotetsu felt about Pao-Lin then, surely, that was how he felt about Miku, too.

Why had he been upset about that to begin with?

Barnaby sighed and shook his head.

He really was an idiot.

He had to tell Kotetsu how he felt- or, at least, part of it. He was going insane, holding the truth to himself for so long. It only made him feel awkward around Kotetsu, and he didn't want that; he didn't want their relationship to become strained.

After all, Kotetsu was the first friend he'd ever made.

He'd thought people could live in a small little bubble by themselves, excluded from contact with the outside world- but when Kotetsu had fallen into his life (and into his arms), that bubble had exploded.

Kotetsu had made Barnaby realize just how empty his life had been- a-and Barnaby didn't want to revert back to how he'd been before; he _couldn't_. He had a lot to thank Kotetsu for, and he didn't want to lose him.

He'd probably never have the courage to 'confess' again, so...

Barnaby inhaled softly.

Butterflies clamored in his stomach; haphazardly brushing together in a manner that made Barnaby tremble- completely overpowered by the strength of his own feelings.

When he spoke, his voice was soft- but Kotetsu caught it anyway.

"You know... When I act cold and aloof towards you... ... you're right- for a change. I don't mean it. At least, not all the time..."

Kotetsu paused, looking at Barnaby in surprise.

Then, he smiled.

"Heh. I know that. I keep saying it. Sometimes, it's kind of hard to tell with you- but you wouldn't hang out with me if you hated me, right? You're the sort of person who doesn't like wasting your time, hm?"

Barnaby nodded.

There was a silence.

Then, Barnaby muttered, "I... ... really like you, Kotetsu."

* * *

><p><strong>an: **yay :3 I'm glad I got this chapter finished~ It's so longgg o: *collapses*  
>And/ I had to cut scenes out XDD

Writing shy/socially awkward/unsure deredere Bunny is so much fun :D I kind of figure given his lack of friendships until he met Kotetsu that he'd be completely lost/useless when it comes to romance and wouldn't know how to act, hence the getting unnecessarily jealous and the confusion. That's just my interpretation though XDD;

There are even more mentions of Vocaloids in here, hope that doesn't throw anybody off XD But Rin is always really refreshing to write ^_^; In most animes when you have a cute female character who acts like a bitch she has some deep tragic back story to excuse her actions, so I always try to subvert that with Rin by making her an annoying brat because she genuinely enjoys making other people feel uncomfortable, and that's it XD

And… Magnet. That pose is such a meme XD There's magnet-inspired artwork for Tiger & Bunny if you search for it on google XD It's very cute ^_^;;

As always, thank you to the people that read/review/put this on alerts/faves etc etc even though the 'story' really does meander every which where (I ~do~ have a chapter plan written out though, that I've been sticking to pretty religiously XD) And in response to the annoymous message- yeah, a lot of the criticism you gave was pretty valid XD I'm aware I'm changing Pao-Lin's character around a bit, given in the anime she's more a sweet/wholesome/caring/headstrong kind of girl than a fangirl type, but I'm slowly trying to make her more like her usual self again XD I was just having some fun there XDD And yes, there are too many inner monologues ._. It's the main reason my stories drag on. I really tried to cut them down in this chapter, this is a big problem for me and has been for a while ._. It's just difficult knowing which bits to cut out and which bits to leave in sometimes XD

**~renahhchen xoxoxo**


	8. Etto etto, ano etto, ano ettoeto

Vegetable Juice  
>o8: Etto etto, ano etto, ano ettoeto<p>

* * *

><p>Barnaby froze the moment the words spilled from his mouth. It was almost as if every cell in his body had come to a grinding halt.<p>

Had he... really said that?

Did that count as a 'confession'?

Anybody who wasn't Kaburagi T. Kotetsu would have realized in an instant that 'I really like you' actually meant 'I love you but I think saying it like that would be really corny so I'm going to say 'like' instead, but it's 'love' all the same!'

Except, in Barnaby's case, there wouldn't have been any exclamation marks tacked on at the end.

He was far too _suave_ for that.

Still, _suave_ or not, some definite feelings of 'I've somehow fallen in love with you and I don't know how' colored Barnaby's words.

Barnaby wasn't sure if 'I really like you' counted as a confession when it came to Kotetsu, though. That damn old man was spectacularly dense when it came to all things romantic, to the point where it seemed necessary to spell every little thought and feeling out word for word so he would understand.

…That was going to be a little tricky, given Barnaby often had problems talking honestly to Kotetsu about what movies he liked, let alone what _emotions _he felt.

Wasn't 'like' good enough?

Barnaby wasn't holding out much hope his message would get across, though.

Antonio had said, on a couple occasions, it was a miracle Kotetsu had ended up dating Tomoe at all. Apparently the 'poor girl' (to use Antonio's own words) had followed Kotetsu around, wide-eyed, for _weeks _until the stupid idiot had realized she was interested… Not to mention Karina's planet-sized crush on him, which was so huge it probably could've been seen from Jupiter _without _the aid of any kind of telescopic lens.

If Kotetsu hadn't realized Karina adored him ('I-I'll treasure this towel forever!' indeed), then how would he realize Barnaby did?

Funnily enough, it was slightly comforting that Kotetsu was just as useless at romance as Barnaby once. It would've killed Barnaby to think that Kotetsu was significantly better than him at something.

Kotetsu looked at Barnaby for a while, head tilted to one side in confusion and- yep, Barnaby had pretty much expected that blank look to be Kotetsu's response,

Even so, dead silence wasn't a flattering reaction to a 'confession'.

Then again, maybe it was for the best. If Kotetsu didn't understand how Barnaby felt, there was no chance anything would change. If nothing changed, Kotetsu would remain his friend, and…

That was fine.

Sort of.

Maybe asking for more would be selfish. Plus, Barnaby didn't know how he'd react if he got more anyway. It was for the best- really. Barnaby wasn't upset at all.

He wasn't.

"...You know what? Forget what I just said," said Barnaby finally, after a sizeable pause, as he folded his arms. "You're dense, but you must already know I value our... friendship? That was all I wanted to say, so you can stop looking at me like that. If you think too much you'll only get a headache."

Barnaby expected Kotetsu to drop the subject.

He _wanted_ Kotetsu to drop the subject.

To be perfectly honest, he hadn't even realized Kotetsu had hold of the subject.

At least, not until Kotetsu reached forwards- "Hey, Bunny!"- and his fingers closed around Barnaby's arm.

For the second time in under a minute Barnaby ground to a halt, his body doing the whole 'sudden deep freeze in formaldehyde' thing once more, until he felt like that frozen shark from that art exhibition a few weeks ago. He couldn't blink. Couldn't breathe. He swore his heart wasn't even beating.

All of a sudden, Barnaby felt trapped.

Trapped by his own feelings and the deadweight of cheap Harlequin novel romance clichés that kept hitting him over the head one after the other.

"Get off me."

"Ahh, I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I'll have to say 'no' to that one."

"Oh? And why is that, old man?"

"It's because... Well, how can I put this into words? Hm... I'm trying to be tactful, so-"

"You? Tactful? This should be good."

Kotetsu didn't respond for a while- but, after a few seconds, he began to grin.

"Ihihi. Now, that's more like the bad-tempered Bunny I know. Being honest and truthful doesn't really suit you, you know?"

"What do you mean? What are you babbling about now?"

Still grinning in that awkward, yet strangely goofy way that made Barnaby's chest constrict, Kotetsu tried to talk.

The key word being 'tried'. Inelegant babbling would have been more accurate.

"What I mean is, uh... Aha, rather, what I'm trying to say... very, very badly, is that... it's kind of weird when you say things like 'I really like you'."

Barnaby tensed slightly. 'Weird'? That didn't bode well. Did that mean Kotetsu had understood his clumsy confession to be entirely that- a _confession? _And was he disturbed by it? Kotetsu never seemed disturbed when Nathan made light-hearted, playful comments about his ~nice body~ and the like, in that...

"I already told you, don't think about it too much," Barnaby insisted, forcing himself to remain calm. "Stop putting so much meaning in such small, inconsequential words."

"But the things you just said weren't small or inconsequential, were they?"

It was enough to shock Barnaby into silence.

"You see, Bunny, you don't really tell the truth a lot," Kotetsu said hesitantly; fingers still curled round Barnaby's arm, as though attempting to root him place- prevent an escape. "You admitted it yourself a few moments ago, and... When I first met you I wouldn't have known- I thought you were an annoying brat- but now, hmn... I can tell there's a soft, squishy... marshmallowy? side behind that brat thing you do so well, and... aha..." A laugh. "Well. I'm not as dense as you think; at least, not all the time! I can tell when you're being serious about something, um... serious. Like before, when you got angry with me, and I still don't understand why- you were serious then. And... just now. You were being serious too... right?"

The sky was darkening overhead; shadows melting together on the sidewalk. Spots of light from the numerous lampposts cat eerie circles of artificial yellow on the ground.

It was cold, too; bitterly cold, and Barnaby was trembling.

"... ...Let go."

"What's wrong, Bunny?"

"My arm," Barnaby explained. "You're holding it too... too tightly. Let go."

His voice was clipped, monotone- but, to his horror, it broke slightly towards the end; wavering with an ill-repressed panic.

"O-oh, sorry about that- I didn't realize, ahaha..."

And yet, despite that, Kotetsu didn't let go.

Barnaby was still shivering. He wondered if Kotetsu could feel it under his fingertips.

"Aren't you going to move then, Kotetsu?"

Barnaby had meant to say 'old man', he swore he had, but his brain betrayed him once more, and his lips soon followed suit. What was supposed to be a snippy insult came out as something rather more sincere than Barnaby was comfortable with.

"Mm, I will, yeah. I'm not going to stand here and hold onto your arm forever, that would be kinda creepy," said Kotetsu, with his usual wide smile.

Barnaby was glad of that smile. It made it a little easier to reply normally.

"Yeah. I think I could get you arrested for that."

"That'd be a pretty flashy way to end our partnership, though- with a restraining order and a huge criminal case! Agnes would probably love it."

"For about five whole minutes, until she realizes-"

"-you'd be lonely without me. Right?"

"I... I-I..."

Kotetsu smiled. "You should stutter like that more. I think it increases your adorable factor by 100%!"

"A-and what was my so-called 'adorable factor' before?"

"Round about zero. Maybe even in the negatives."

Barnaby paused; faltering slightly. He was good at keeping it together in interviews, sure, but he was never emotionally invested in them; they didn't _matter_. This was a different kind of pressure altogether, this was, this was...

W-what _was_ this?

"I... A-aren't... you going to let go any time soon?"

"I don't want to."

"Why not?"

"Because..."

Kotetsu laughed a little too loudly, free hand clenching round the bag of vegetables. It rustled. The slight noise was enough to make Barnaby jump.

"Aah, well... Because..."

The look in Kotetsu's eyes was smouldering.

"Because... I'm afraid..."

His voice was sincere.

"I'm afraid, if I let go... You'll run away, just like last time, when you started being surprisingly sincere... And then I'll be left feeling like I've done something wrong, and we'll have another hour long argument that's really kind of pointless because I feel miserable when you're unhappy and you, despite acting so heartless, probably feel exactly the same, and then we'll make up but nothing will have been resolved... A-and, yeah. I don't want that. I want to make you stay here.

"I want to talk to the real Barnaby for a bit."

Barnaby's eyes widened; his heart thumping painfully in his chest.

Did Kotetsu just call him by his real name...?

Did that mean something? Anything?

What...?

Kotetsu's laughter managed to break through the parade of questions in Barnaby's head, effectively sending them into greater disarray than before.

"Haha!~ I sounded pretty cool there, didn't I?"

Barnaby pursed his lips slightly, unable to tell whether he was annoyed or amused by this sudden shift in the tone of conversation. Thankfully, his expression began to move without his permission; lips twitching, unbidden, into one of his rare smiles. They were getting more and more common, though; especially around Kotetsu.

He just couldn't help himself.

"No," Barnaby replied, cool and cutting. "You sounded ridiculous."

"Then why were you blushing?"

"...I wasn't. It was a trick of light."

"Of course. Sure thing, Bunny- if that's what you say."

"I'm telling the truth."

Denial. It was a wonderful thing.

Kotetsu obviously wasn't buying it (why did he choose _now_, all of a sudden, to become so damn perceptive?), but that didn't stop him from smiling indulgently; just like a parent would smile when their child began making up lies about how gremlins or house sprites had stolen all the cookies, it certainly wasn't them- and those weren't cookie crumbs on their fingers, of course not!

"Anyway... I, um, kind of get the feeling you might have something more to say? I've been talking a whole load, not even about anything important; I'm sorry! If I talk too much you can always tell me to shut up, you know," said Kotetsu, grinning. "That's what everybody else does."

"I'm aware of that. I have no qualms with telling you to shut up- it's just..." Barnaby muttered the following words begrudgingly, "What you were saying just now seemed slightly less stupid than the things you usually say, that's all."

"But, Bunny. Do you wanna clarify anything with me?"

"Not really..."

"Aww, c'mon. I know you don't like talking about yourself very much- and by that, I mean the squishy adorable inner-Bunny, 'cause you have no problem talking about your clothes or your hair in interviews, but I'm not really interested in that! You've been acting kind of 'off' lately and... I'm a little worried. Wanna elaborate?"

"No."

"B-but Bunny, I'm your partner!"

"I mean... no, I don't want to talk about it... here. Where other people can hear."

Kotetsu blinked, looking about his surroundings. Then, he grinned sheepishly.

"Aha, yeah, good thinking, Bunny. So..." A bright smile. "Your place or mine?"

* * *

><p>"Hey, sorry about all the mess, Bunny- just act like it's not there, right?~ I think it gives the place a certain ambiance anyway, aheheh..."<p>

'Ambience'?

Well… that was partially right.

Kotetsu's flat did have a certain _something _about it (or 'je ne sais quoi', as Agnes would say).

To be blunt, it looked like a trash heap- but saying that probably would have been offensive to trash heaps. Litter was scattered about on the floor and sticky plate upon sticky, food-stained plates stacked up on the coffee table precariously, like some kind of modern art project. Bits of rice were glued to the table. Empty bottles were strewn everywhere, and those bottles that hadn't been empty to begin with sure as hell were now, given their alcoholic contents had been spilt over the carpet.

No matter how much Barnaby liked Kotetsu, he didn't like all of his habits.

In a perfect world, people who were that messy would get their hands cut off as punishment.

"...Your apartment is a disgrace to the human race."

Defensively, Kotetsu said, "H-hey, now that's a bit harsh! It's homey and lived in! Plus, I am kind of busy, you know- way too busy to bother to tidy up. I've got work and Kaede and trying to babysit bad tempered bunnies- it takes up a lot of time."

Barnaby glared. "I thought you said I _wasn't _a child."

"Huh?"

Kotetsu paused.

Then, his eyes widened.

"A-ah, no, um... slip of the tongue?"

"If you think I'm a child that needs 'babysitting' then I don't see why you would take what I have to say seriously..." Barnaby said slowly, softly, his fingers clenching into fists. The bag of vegetables, which had been weighing Barnaby down during his walk to Kotetsu's apartment, were now gone; stored in Kotetsu's fridge, allowing for a greater freedom of movement. "And if you won't take my feelings seriously, then... I don't want to tell you them."

Kotetsu frowned; obvious hurt flashing across his face, though he tried to hide it.

Kotetsu had never been very good at hiding his feelings, though.

"Oh, come on, Bunny, stop being so awkward. I'm worried about you."

"...Why?"

"Because I care about you, that's why."

Barnaby thought, after all these months, he'd be used to matter-of-fact responses like that. Kotetsu cared about _everyone_. That small handful of words shouldn't have made his heart beat just a little quicker in his chest after all the times he'd said it.

But it still did.

"I... I..."

"You're stuttering again. I didn't know you had a stutter," said Kotetsu, a small smile tugging at his lips. "I wasn't joking before when I said it suited you, though."

Barnaby looked down at the floor, flushing, and kicked an empty bottle idly with his foot. It rolled away under the couch as though it had never been there at all.

"Shut up."

Kotetsu stuck out his tongue. "No."

"And you said _I _was the one who needed babysitting..."

"Aha, well, let's not bring that up again. I don't wanna annoy you- which is impossibly easy to do."

"You're annoying me right now."

"And you're proving my point. So..."

"So…?"

Kotetsu moved forwards so he was impossibly close- way too close. The serious look in his eyes (a contrast to that wide smile) was almost hypnotic; pinning Barnaby in place like a butterfly on a board. "What's wrong...?"

"You're... not going to let this go, are you?"

Kotetsu shook his head. "Nope~ I'm going to get to the bottom of this mystery even if it kills me!"

"It might kill you. _I _might kill you."

"Nah. You wouldn't."

"And why not?"

"Because... I have faith in you!"

There was a small pause. Then, Kotetsu began to laugh; smiling so brightly it hurt to look at.

"Ahh… Was that a little too cheesy?"

Barnaby nodded. "Just a little... But..."

"But?"

"You wouldn't be you if you didn't do stupid things. And then..." Barnaby inhaled heavily; looking down at the floor in embarrassment and, whoa, had his shoes ever been that _riveting_? "And then... I wouldn't like you half as much as I do. Which... would probably be a good thing, to be honest."

"Hn? Bunny? You're being sincere again. I'm kind of scared!"

With great effort, Barnaby was able to force his gaze upwards once more; green eyes staring into Kotetsu's.

"I thought you _wanted_ me to be sincere."

"I do, really, but-"

"W-well, I don't want to be. At all. But..." Another deep breath; inhale and exhale. Barnaby didn't want to hyperventilate right now. Or ever. But now would be especially bad timing. "But... You said you were worried about me, so I'll tell you. I'm not good with words though, and you'd probably just misinterpret them anyway, so... Maybe I should try and be more straightforward."

"You're _never _straightforward."

"Well, I can always try. So that even you understand how I feel... Kotetsu."

Oh God. It felt like Barnaby's stomach was going to jump out of his mouth, and those butterflies that had made themselves at his stomach were fluttering about demonically more than ever. He was trembling, barely able to hold himself together, and it was a little sad, really, that he was going to tell Kotetsu _this_- one of the most intense, confusing feelings he had ever experienced- in the middle of Kotetsu's messy living room, with bottles strewn everywhere and sloppily drawn, glittery pictures by a five-year-old Kaede blu-tacked to the walls. Didn't talks like this usual happen in more scenic, picturesque locations, like beaches or forests, with beautiful sunsets?

For the first time, Barnaby was acutely aware of all the eyes watching him; numerous photographs arranged on the shelves, frozen images in time of a woman who didn't exist anymore.

Tomoe, looking tired but happy nevertheless, dressed in a hospital gown and holding a newborn baby Kaede with a funny-shaped head; Tomoe, Kotetsu and Kaede all curled up together like a family of sleeping cats; Tomoe reading Kaede a bedtime story with half-lidded, sleepy eyes.

Tomoe dressed in white, holding a bouquet of flowers, whilst Kotetsu stood beside her. They were both smiling.

Somehow, the multiple eyes from those split-second captures seemed judgemental.

Tomoe meant a lot to Kotetsu. Maybe he was still in love with her.

Even though Kotetsu was more than happy to talk about his wife, Barnaby wasn't sure if he was 'over' her. Maybe talking about her all the time was a coping mechanism. Some people just wanted to forget, and others desperately wanted to cling onto whatever memories remained. Barnaby had never really been in love before, so he didn't know what it felt like- but what if he managed to offend Kotetsu, or somehow insult the memory of Tomoe? Kotetsu still wore his wedding ring on his finger, after all.

It hurt to breathe.

Kotetsu was stood before him, looking confused, head tilted to one side and- "Bunny, are you alright...?", but Barnaby could hardly answer because he wasn't sure if he was or not and, urgh, did feelings have to be so complicated? It had been easier when he shunned humanity in general, because then he didn't have to deal with all of this confusion-

"Bunny...?"

He didn't know what to do.

_Don't hate me for this, Kotetsu..._

* * *

><p>Just like usual, Hero's bar was packed out; filled with large swarms of people who were chattering loudly, whilst wearing some of the strangest clothes even conceived by humankind.<p>

Cute waitresses in skimpy faux-Hero costumes served drinks with smiles; resplendent in red leotards and blue capes. Their outfits were more tailored to being 'fanservicey' rather than realistic. Not even Blue Rose's costume was _that _revealing- and that was saying something.

It was difficult to pick out individual people in the crowd, given they were all smushed up and compacted together like flakes of tuna in a can; elbows jostling sides, drinks being spilt and insults being traded whilst, all the while, an endless, insipid commentary of _'Sky High has just rescued the civilian from the burning building!_' played from the TV screens over the buzz of noise.

This scene, however, is not focused on the overweight man in the Hawaiian shirt trying to chat up one of the pretty waitresses, or the blonde-haired, flat-chested girl who looks about twelve with candy in her hair, or even the girl with the very nice scarf and distinctive moles underneath both eyes.

This scene is focused on two women sat at the bar.

They seemed rather ordinary on first glance- and they did on the second, third and fourth glances, too. They were attractive, there was no denying it, but far prettier, younger girls swarmed the bar. That was why nobody was paying any attention to them, or listening to their conversation- save small snatches caught rising above the bubble of noise once in a while.

That was just as well, because what they were talking about was anything _but_ ordinary.

"I don't see why we had to meet here, of all places. People might think we're friends."

"Of course," Agnes Joubert replied smoothly, rolling her eyeliner-heavy eyes. "We wouldn't want that, would we?"

Twenty-eight year old Haigo Meiko said, lips pursed, as she prodded her glass of mineral water with one long, red fingernail. The meniscus of the liquid trembled slightly. It a sad sort of way, it was pretty interesting to watch.

Meiko sighed. Her life must've been pretty shitty if she was sat in a bar drinking _water_ with a woman from a rival company she didn't particularly like, pushing her glass about the table like a picky little kid. She was still in the prime of her youth; she should have been drinking like a fish with some handsome guy, not having an impromptu business meeting at eleven p.m, for God's sake.

It was kind of depressing to note she wasn't getting any male attention at all, either- and all the other girls seemed to be ten years younger than her.

She was still young, wasn't she...?

_Gahhh_.

Maybe it was the suit that was aging her.

And the bags under her eyes.

"If this really is 'top secret business'," Meiko continued, her fingers making quotey marks in the air, "then why are we discussing it in a crowded public place where anybody can overhear us?"

Agnes smirked.

Meiko didn't like that smirk very much.

She didn't like Agnes, full stop- and she liked her even less when she spoke.

"Oh my. Despite being the producer of your own company, you're shockingly naïve. People will hear bits and pieces of our conversation, surely, and that will create rumors. Rumors create public interest. Public interest generates higher ratings. I guarantee, if a few people surrounding us spread bits some information, the season finale of this year's Hero TV will have the highest ratings since... well. Since last year, when Barnaby made his debut~

"Hero TV has a consistently high viewership, you know? It's pretty difficult to top our previous records- but I'm sure it's possible." Agnes smiled deviously, flipping a few strands of silky brown hair behind her shoulder. "Of course, you wouldn't know anything about that, given _your _company is still taking petite little baby steps into the real world."

Meiko glared at Agnes; the dark look exemplified by the black grooves cut against her pale, sleep-deprived skin. The make-up slathered onto her face couldn't quite save her. Instead, it only served to make her look worse.

Agnes, in comparison, was almost radiant. She was smiling to herself over the success of Hero TV like a proud mother would beam over her son placing first in a spelling test- but there was nothing maternal about Agnes at all.

The only thing she cared about was money.

Irritatingly enough, however, Agnes was right. Meiko's company _was_ a fairly small one and, though it had managed to stay afloat on Miku's unexpected success, it couldn't last like that for much longer. Eventually, Hero TV's relentless campaign to drive Miku out of the public eye would work, even if it took months.

Meiko knew about that only too well.

First hand knowledge.

It still hurt to think about.

She hadn't wanted to pair up with Hero TV- not at all. In fact, the main reason she tried to market Miku as a successful idol had been to challenge them directly; some petty childhood score to settle that hadn't died away the older she got. Meiko had wanted Miku to become super-successful under her guidance and nobody else's.

That... was looking to be pretty impossible at the moment, though.

In the end, she had to swallow her pride and accept the offer.

That didn't mean she had to be happy about it, though.

With a face like thunder, Meiko picked up her glass of mineral water and downed it in one. Oh, how she wanted to drink something alcoholic- but she would never show weakness in front of Agnes like tht.

She might have been working with the enemy, but she certainly didn't want to start drinking with them.

* * *

><p>"Scarf-tan, what's wrong?"<p>

"I-I do have a name, you know!" the young girl said defensively as she pouted at her friend.

"I know, but Scarf-tan sounds cuter~"

The young girl (who now, for all intents and purposes, will be named 'Scarf-tan') continued to pout, sliding down her chair slowly. She tugged at her cutsey scarf in distain.

"Maybe I'll stop wearing this, then…"

"No, you can't do that! It was a gift from your boyfriend, right?~ I know, when I'm in love, I want to keep every gift I receive from that person~"

"But you haven't received any gifts from anybody yet."

"Kyah! Don't remind me. That's why we're here drinking; so I can forgettt that nobody loves me," the nameless background character who doesn't deserve a title but I'll probably have to give her one at some point in the future anyway muttered darkly. "You say some pretty heartless things sometimes."

Scarf-tan smiled sheepishly. "Ah, sorry, sorry."

"Mm. Anyway. You were kind of spacing out back there? What's wronggg?"

Scarf-tan paused, fingers still tugging lightly at her scarf. She looked thoughtful for a few moments- before, finally, she beamed.

"I don't know. I just… I swore I heard somebody saying something about Wild Tiger and Barnaby…"

The nameless girl- who we will now dub Jessica for the sake of convenience (whether that is her real name remains to be seen)- sighed, rolling her eyes. "Man, and you're getting excited about _that_? Newsflash; this is _Hero's Bar. _Of course people will be talking about heroes here! Even more so than usual, given the heroes have been so busy lately. You can't walk ten steps in the city without seeing Blue Rose or Dragon Kid advertising something." Jessica grinned. "It's seriously _craaaazy_; but I guess, if they've got enough time to tell us how awesome brillo pads are, nothin' too major or world-ending is gonna happen soon."

"Y-yes, but… Um, I think… I-I think… I think… I-I think they said the heroes were gong to collaborate with Miku-Miku!"

_This_ managed to get a response out of Jessica, though nothing else had done.

_Bang!_

The palm of her hand falling against the tabletop, making the empty glasses rattle, Jessica leant forwards, eyes wide.

"Huh? Miku? Seriously?"

"Seriously, seriously!"

"Is this some crazy rumor?"

"I-I don't know…"

"Who was talking about it?"

"T-those two women there," said Scarf-tan shyly, gesturing towards the very official-looking backs of Meiko and Agnes.

"Do you think it's true?"

"Maybe… I don't know."

Jessica leant back on her chair, fingers under her chin.

Then, her eyes lit up.

Her cell phone was in her hands in seconds.

"U-um, what are you doing?"

"I'm going to tell everybody about this awesome story, duhhh!"

* * *

><p>When Barnaby's lips parted from Kotetsu's, his face was bright red.<p>

That blush wasn't a good look. It clashed with his jacket and it didn't look 'cute' at all. It was embarrassing and looked idiotic- not that Kotetsu knew anything about… well, _anything._

That was a pretty valid assessment.

"_There_," said Barnaby, voice a little sharper than usual. "Not even you could misinterpret that."

Kotetsu stood there, frozen, like a statue. A wide-eyed, open-mouthed statue with perpetually messy hair.

As Barnaby watched Kotetsu, he felt his heart sink like a peach pit. Maybe this had been a mistake…

No.

It had _definitely _been a mistake.

He'd been stupid to think Kotetsu would return his feelings. Kotetsu had a wife- and, although she was dead, that didn't mean she was any less than his wife. Maybe having romantic feelings towards him was insensitive; _especially _when he'd kissed Kotetsu in front of that wedding picture, where Kotetsu and Tomoe looked so happy.

Tomoe's eyes, frozen in time, seemed to stare at Barnaby reproachfully.

I-if he'd fucked up his partnership with Kotetsu, then…

Then…

Kotetsu was the first person Barnaby had connected with in years, ever since the age of _four_, for God's sake. Barnaby might have said cruel things to him at times, but it was mostly playful- and he'd never_ had_ anybodyto be 'playful' with before in his whole life.

When he was with Kotetsu, he felt… happy.

Wanted.

And a whole load of other clichés that were, frankly, humiliating; things that could be found inside any manga made for young, wide-eyed, impressionable girls who wanted to find the _perfect man~_

Of course, Kotetsu wasn't perfect, but nobody was. That was reality- and Barnaby liked Kotetsu exactly the way he was, clumsiness and slightly too long legs and all. He could even stand the messy flat- as long as he never had to stay there for more than an hour.

Kotetsu still hadn't said anything. That was ominous. Usually, he never shut up…

Barnaby didn't prompt him, though. He was too afraid of the response.

Ha. It was funny, really. Barnaby had no problems fighting ridiculously super-powered NEXT who'd struck lucky on the superpower lottery, but- right now- he couldn't bring himself to look into Kotetsu's eyes.

…Maybe that wasn't funny.

Instead, it was sad.

Fighting was easy. Talking was a little more difficult; a refined art Barnaby had yet to fully understand.

Barnaby inhaled heavily, forcing his features to remain blank. In truth, he kind of wanted to break down- maybe shout at himself for being an idiot, maybe ponder over all the happy times he'd had with Kotetsu before he did the stupidest, most impulsive thing he'd ever done in his life, maybe cry a little if his spirits got so low he stopped caring about making a fool out of himself over something so small and trivial- but he couldn't do any of things; not in front of somebody else.

Not even in front of Kotetsu.

He'd seen this coming anyway, so… it shouldn't have hurt so much. It was like putting your hand in the fire and then being surprised when you got burned.

There was no other outcome for his confession that rejection. Kotetsu had never ever indicated he might actually be in love with Barnaby, after all.

It… shouldn't have hurt.

But it still _did._

It stung horribly.

It wasn't Kotetsu's fault if he didn't return his feelings. Barnaby really had no right to be so depressed about the whole thing; it wasn't like Kotetsu _owed _him anything. That stupid old man had already given him so much; so many happy memories he'd never be able to repay.

When Barnaby next spoke, his voice was carefully measured. It didn't convey how he felt inside.

"I'm very sorry…"

Was it standard procedure to apologize after kissing somebody?

Barnaby didn't know. He'd never done it before.

That was… his first kiss.

"I realize that was a mistake. I'll leave now," Barnaby continued, voice soft. "Please, excuse me."

"Wait…"

One simple syllable, and already Barnaby could feel his heart constrict in his chest. If it kept doing that, maybe it was a sign he had some serious medical condition.

It'd… be alright if Kotetsu didn't say anything. Barnaby was sure he could restrain his emotions if he got no reply and- damn it, he never used to _have _any emotions before other than this constant kind of emptiness, and now he had way too many; how did normal people manage to categorize them all so they didn't collapse under their weight?

If Kotetsu started talking, though, and said something… it'd be something sweet, no doubt, something like 'I'm very sorry, but I can't return your feelings', certainly it wouldn't be cruel because Kotetsu wasn't like that, but it'd… still hurt.

It'd hurt too much.

Barnaby knew he wouldn't be able to control himself.

So… … why wasn't he leaving?

"L-look, I…"

There was a sigh; tired- and, for once, Kotetsu sounded as old as he claimed he was. He ran his hands through his hair in a distracted manner, hat thrown to one side.

Any conversation that started with 'look, I', didn't bode well. That was an unshakable fact of the universe.

Kind of like the law that stated the world would come to end if Blue Rose went out into public without any make-up on.

"You don't need to say anything," said Barnaby, praying that his voice didn't break, or he didn't start doing that damn lisp that sometimes made itself manifest when he was particularly emotional. "It's alright. I understand. I'll leave now."

"H-hey, Bunny!" Kotetsu's voice was pleading; desperate. "Don't say you understand when I haven't told you how I feel yet!"

Fingers clamped round Barnaby's arm; rooting him place. Kotetsu was just inches away from him.

Kotetsu had used his nickname so casually, as though nothing had changed. Maybe… nothing had changed?

Had he been stupid…?

Barnaby's face turned light pink.

"Haven't you ever heard of personal space, old man?"

"Funny you should say that, given you kissed me a few seconds ago."

"N-ngh… T-that… was a mistake!"

"Huh? I thought you were too perfect to make mistakes. Especially a mistake like that."

Barnaby didn't have the words. He didn't have _any _words. Instead, he could only stutter helplessly, making vague sounds. "I-I… I…"

"Ha~ Now you really _do _look like a bunny in the headlights, with eyes all wide like that."

Kotetsu smiled softly, fondly, in a way that made Barnaby tremble slightly. It felt like his knees wouldn't support him anymore. He hoped he didn't collapse into Kotetsu's arms; the princess carry was _his _job.

"Stop teasing me," Barnaby muttered, fingers clenching into fists at his sides. "This is serious, you know… I wouldn't joke about something like this."

"I know, I know."

"If you think this is funny, I won't forgive you; I absolutely _won't_!"

"I've got it," said Kotetsu, still smiling- though somewhat awkwardly. "Look, Bunny, I… um…"

Kotetsu looked (and sounded) a little lost; completely out of his depth- just like a father trying to explain the workings of life to their young daughter, or some such thing.

"When you said you liked me earlier, you meant… You… … You… U-um, you… _love_ me?"

Barnaby flinched slightly.

"Y-you could… take my feelings into account… Don't say it so bluntly."

But, slowly, Barnaby nodded; jerking his head upwards once in a robotic movement.

There was a small silence.

Barnaby stared at Kotetsu, slightly shame-faced.

Kotetsu stared back.

Then, all of a sudden… Kotetsu pulled Barnaby into a tight hug.

"A-ah, Kotetsu?"

Barnaby wasn't prepared for it- not at all. Kotetsu really should have warned before he did stupid stuff like that- a-and his heart rate was impossibly fast, and if he _died _from cardiac arrest it would be entirely Kotetsu's fault because that stupid idiot couldn't keep his hands to himself, really…

But, even so… it was nice and… and…

When Kotetsu finally pulled away, they were both incredibly flustered.

Apparently, Kotetsu had acted without really thinking about it, given how embarrassed he was, too.

That was so like Kotetsu.

"Hey…" Kotetsu's voice was calm, comforting; tinged with a sunshine smile. "I don't really know what to say. But… um… I-I never expected you would-"

"I didn't either," Barnaby replied, voice overly acidic to compensate for his flushed face. "It's not like I _planned _this."

"Of course not. And, um… I'm not very good at dealing with this. Like, at all. You'll have to forgive me- it's been, like, ten years since somebody confessed to me… so I'm a little rusty in my responses!"

"K-kotetsu…"

"Plus, u-um, Tomoe did all the sex ed stuff with Kaede, you know, ahahaha…"

Barnaby's voice deadpanned. "I don't need you to teach me how sex works, Kotetsu."

"I know, but… um… I just don't, um… know how I feel about all this, or even how to react… That's all."

"You don't know…?"

"Well, I haven't really thought about it! You're just my partner- a-and, I love spending time with you and everything, but… to think about you like… like _that_, I just… I don't know." Kotetsu paused. "Aha… I don't really know!"

Barnaby looked at Kotetsu with eyes slightly wider than usual, too surprised to be truly annoyed or upset.

"If you don't know… then why did you hug me earlier?"

"Oh, now that I _can _answer!" said Kotetsu, regaining some of his bright nature. "You just looked so sad and mopey I couldn't help myself! I don't want you to be miserable, you know!"

"R-right…"

"I mean, I don't know what I'm meant to think or feel or whatever about this- actually, it was kind of the same with Tomoe, ahaha… And this is kind of sudden, s-so maybe we should… talk about it? But I'd never abandon you." Kotetsu smiled, giving Barnaby a thumbs up. "I mean, you're still my partner. And… you're my friend. That will never change, no matter what. Just… give me a little time to figure out how I feel, please? I'm kind of slow with this stuff… I'm sorry."

It was more than Barnaby could have hoped for. Even if Kotetsu didn't return his feelings… he wasn't going to cast him aside. He was still his usual cheery self- and when he had hugged him…

It was more than he deserved; more than he had even hoped for.

"Hn?"

Barnaby blinked in surprise as he felt fingertips prodding his cheek; Kotetsu smiling as he poked his partner gently.

"There~ You really do look nicer when you smile…" Kotetsu frowned. "And yet you'd waste those good looks on somebody like me? You could have virtually anybody you wanted, you know?"

Barnaby's face flushed.

It was difficult to bite back a cutting retort; for Barnaby, he'd always protected himself from emotion by being cold and cynical. But… he couldn't hide his feelings anymore.

There wasn't much point, given he'd just kissed Kotetsu.

Softly, almost shyly, Barnaby admitted, "My feelings for you aren't… a waste. If anybody deserves my respect, and admiration, and… anything else… it would be you. General clumsiness and ineptitude aside."

Kotetsu smiled. "You really do have a very funny way of showing your feelings, Lil' Bunny."

"D-don't call me that!"

* * *

><p>"You're drunk."<p>

"Yep. Thanks for pointing that out, I _neverrr_ would've guessed."

"Um… Y-you're not mad with me, are you, Mei?"

"I'm _always _mad with you. It's therapeutic," Meiko muttered grumpily.

Her head rested against the side of the car. Every time it sped over a bump in the road her head would knock against the window painfully, but she didn't have enough energy to sit herself up. She'd just have to endure the pain, then.

Everything was painful.

Blehhhhh.

"I don't know why you have to drink so much, honestly. It only makes you miserable."

"_Life _makes me miserable."

"Ahaha, um… t-that's not good. Be cheerful. Positive? I think sunny-spirited _genki_-typegirls are in fashion right now!"

"Man, don't shoutttt so much, you're giving me a headache, idiot," Meiko whined, idly prodding her part-time boyfriend full-time punch bag in the side. "Geez. Are you trying to piss me off? Oh, no- you do that all the time without trying!"

"That was a little uncalled for; I just want you to feel better."

"How can I feel better when I'm making deals with _the enemy_?" Meiko hissed; berry red lips pursed in disgust and distaste. "They're the ones that ruined my career in the first place… Damn heroes…"

"It's not the heroes' fault! They fight to protect the city of Sternbild- they're so awesome! I think they deserve all the good publicity they get! Wild Tiger, especially, is so awesome."

"Oh, please, enough of your fanboyish wet dreams, Kaito."

Kaito's face turned light pink. "It's not like that! I-I just admire him, that's all!"

"Yeah, yeah. _Whatever_. You've already infected your little sister with this creepy Wild Tiger equals God ideology- stop trying to convert me to your strange religion, too."

"T-that's not it, that's not it at all! I just think he's so cool- always trying to save the civilians, no matter what the cost! I want to be just like him…"

"You _are_ just like him. You're clumsy as hell and you make me very, very angry."

"I think that's the alcohol talking, I hope?"

Meiko smirked. "Probably… but seeing your face makes my intense rage worse. Come on, Kaito, you're meant to be comforting me- going, 'oh yeah, Hero TV is a wasteeee, they put a cute young idol out of business when she was sixteen and **ruined her dreams**!', that's what I want you to say!"

"B-but I love heroes…"

"And who do you love more?" Meiko asked darkly, glaring at her boyfriend. "Heroes… or _me_?"

Kaito laughed nervously. "U-um, to be honest, at the moment I'm kind of scared of you…"

Meiko glowered.

When she spoke, her voice was dark. "It's not about saving people."

"M-meiko…?"

"Sure, maybe some of these heroes truly believe they're doing it for the 'good of the world'… but it's all about publicity. Hero TV isn't necessary. I hate it. I really hate it- and I hate the people involved in it, too. Treating real human lives as entertainment...! It's all about ratings this, ratings that; I can't support heroes at all when they parade around advertising Calbee's on their outfits! It's so fake, so superficial… and thinking about it makes me feel sick."

Kaito's eyes widened in surprise; equal parts confusion and sadness. He knew all about Meiko's background, of course. A few short-lived weeks as an idol, and then… nothing. She was a star who'd burnt out pretty quickly; even though her life-long dream had always been to sing.

That was why she wanted Miku to be such a success. For revenge.

Was that really the right way to go about it, though?

Kaito didn't know.

Maybe Meiko didn't even know either.

That… was probably the reason why she was such an unhappy drunk.

Well, that, and the fact she'd recently had to strike a deal with Hero TV to ensure Miku's fate didn't go the same way as hers' had done almost ten years ago.

"I'm sure not all the heroes are that bad," said Kaito softly. "They're not just walking billboards, and they sound so sincere in their interviews, too… Heroes are people with hopes and dreams, just like you. Is it really so weird to think some people dream of being able to save others, just like you always wanted to sing?"

"I _know _that! I'm not so stupid I don't know that- but…"

"But?"

"I'm not mature, okay? I'm still childish enough o get upset over this!" Meiko shouted; voice loud, eyes narrowed.

"M-meiko…?"

"A-and I'll get the last laugh in the end… They want my precious Miku-Miku to be saved by a hero, huh? Sure thing… but it won't be one of _your_ heroes."

"Aha, it sounds like you're planning something pretty big, Meiko."

"Of course. M'not just a pretty face."

"You're not getting many 'pretty' points at the moment with your make-up smeared like that."

"S-shut up, stupid!"

Kaito smiled a little sadly, turning his eyes back to the road.

Meiko always worked her hardest- but he hoped she wouldn't burn herself out.

_Hey. Do your best, Meiko._

_I love heroes, really… But I'll be your number one fan._

* * *

><p><strong>an: **Oh god this chapter. Such a pain to write. A huge pain. My 'writing process' for this basically went 'write one sentence. Re-read it twelve times. Decide it's awful. Delete it, then go watch back-to-back episodes of Sailor Moon to stop self feeling so depressed.' And repeat.  
>But I managed to get through, like, 25 episodes of Sailor Moon or something ridiculous whilst doing this XDD Considering I've been watching the whole series over 2 years, suddenly watching 25 eps in a week is pretty good… XD;<br>If I get this many problems with the next chapter I'll have finished all of superS in like 3 days XD

Yeah. I don't know how good I am at writing fluffy desu kawaiiiii stuff, which is what 60% of this chapter is. I feel it gets a bit repetitive. I cut a load of /stuff/ out, believe me I did, but it still might get a bit samey and boring ._. At one point I was like 'good God this chapter is a train wreck, I can't show it to _other human beings_', but after some pretty intensive editing I think maybe it reads alright?  
>I think some people might not like the extra characters thrown in, but I feel those extra scenes were necessary because 1) plot purposes, 2) it's a nice break from all the deredere Bunny. Without breaks like that in the middle this chapter might honestly get too sappy. And, even with them... XDD;<br>Plus, Scarf-tan is /everywhere/ o:  
>The other girl with her is a cameo from anther fandom I've written a whole bunch for. I wonder if anybody knows what she's from? XD;<p>

The title is a line from the song 'Toeto' by ToraborutaP (who did that other super-famous vocaloid song, 'Kokoro'!) I don't know if 'Toeto' itself is a meme, but it /feels/ like one, given it's that one song _everybody _makes their fanmade vocaloids sing, plus the insanely huge amount of fanmade PVs/fan arts/fan dubs for it. The cutsey lyrics fit this chapter pretty well XD It's all about not being able to talk to the person you love, too XD Even though I don't actually like that song all that much but, shhhh XD

**~renahhchen xoxoxoxoxo**


	9. Love & Joy

Vegetable Juice  
>o9: Love &amp; Joy~<p>

* * *

><p>"Look at <em>that<em>! Don't you think it's awesome?"

"...It's impractical, certainly."

"Aww, c'monnn, Bunny. You're no fun!"

"No. I just have slightly more mature tastes than you when it comes to entertainment."

Kotetsu stuck his tongue out childishly, swiping the bowl of popcorn off the table and onto his lap as he did so. "Well, fine then. Be an elitist snob if it makes you happy- but don't think you're getting anymore popcorn."

"That's fine. I don't like popcorn anyway."

Kotetsu raised a brow. "Oh, oh, lemme guess- you're too _mature_ for it?"

"No. I merely have no desire to eat a food that contains more fat than two steak dinners combined. It's disgusting. You're effectively poisoning your own body."

"But it'd be a really tasty, buttery death! Hey…" Kotetsu paused. "Tasty, Buttery Death… That sounds like it could be the name of a heavy metal band, ihihi."

Barnaby sighed. "Well, I wouldn't know anything about that kind of music. And popcorn is still disgusting."

"Urgh. You really are a cynical, joyless person," Kotetsu said, chomping kernels of popcorn as he spoke. "I bet you don't like jell-o, either- and that's the most _amazing_food that's ever been created; even more amazing than sliced bread! I mean, it's a solid _and_a liquid at the same time, but it's not disgusting like custard! Truly, amazing, I tell you."

Barnaby tilted his head to one side, slightly unsure of how to respond to that bizarre comment. Who'd get that excited about jell-o, other than a sugar-high five year old at a birthday party?

Then again...

That was just Kotetsu.

"No..." Barnaby said softly; voice almost indistinct above the sound of various explosions and insanity emitting from the TV. "Jell-o is fine. I like that."

Kotetsu looked at Barnaby, eyes wide. He might as well have said he liked eating babies, for the emoticon-esque stare of disbelief he received.

"You like food like that?"

"I don't mind it. Is that so surprising?"

"Well... _yeah_. I thought you'd be all elitist and say 'oh, I only eat cavier plated in gold sprinkled with diamante quails' eggs' or something!"

"Hn- you mean the jell-o wasn't coated in gold dust to begin with? Now I'm disappointed, old man."

Kotetsu's eyes widened even further at that, to the point where Barnaby wondered whether they'd fall out of his skull. That'd be a waste, because Kotetsu had such nice eyes.

His laugh was nicer, though.

"Ahaha!~ You know, you really shouldn't make jokes with a straight face like that! I might start to believe you!"

Unwittingly, Barnaby found himself smiling softly, too- though he tried to hide it by covering his mouth behind the captive cushion he held in his arms. Of course, Kotetsu had found it hilarious- and slightly endearing- Barnaby had snagged a cushion from the couch to hug as he watched a movie, but Barnaby couldn't really help it. He had to have something to keep his hands occupied, or his fingers would've started to twitch indecisively, unsure where to put them.

And why was Barnaby at Kotetsu apartment, anyway?

…Truth be told, it was something Barnaby was pondering himself, because he wasn't entirely sure. Kotetsu had suggested though, so it was all his fault- as most things were.

"It's pretty dark outside, and I don't want you walking back by yourself," Kotetsu had said, smiling a little awkwardly; seemingly unsure how, exactly, to word his concerns without sounding overly reciprocal of Barnaby's sudden, blurted out confession.

That awkwardness had been a little jarring, but Barnaby didn't mind. It was only to be expected.

It was his fault, after all.

"I'm not a teenager, Kotetsu. I'll be perfectly fine going home in the dark. Besides, I could always call a cab."

"Ahaha, yeah, I know... but..." A sheepish grin. "Well, I can't help it. Father's instinct? I know I wouldn't Kaede going out in the dark at this time- and I know you're _way_older than her, and a hero who is obviously _so_perfect nobody would ever dare lay a finger on you, etcetera, etcetera, but you're as important to me as Kaede is and I... wouldn't feel comfortable... if you left now. If that makes sense."

"K-kotetsu..."

"Mm, and... well... I don't want anything to be weird between us, okay? There's nothing wrong with asking you to stay over, is there? It's not like anything will happen or anything because I, well... um..."

Kotetsu broke off. He had looked a little abashed at that- silencing himself quickly, but Barnaby was able to fill in the blanks.

He didn't really like what Kotetsu was insinuating.

"It's fine," Barnaby had said, voice a little colder than usual because, really, that botched, messy refusal from Kotetsu had been quite hurtful. "Just because I'm attracted you, it doesn't mean I'm going to force myself on you. Don't flatter yourself."

Kotetsu had winced visibly at that.

"I-I'm sorry, I said something dumb. Or… implied it. I'm just not used to this, you know, it's-"

"Weird?"

"_Different_. I don't think you're 'weird'. I mean, yeah..." He broke off, correcting himself with a small smile. "I've always thought you were weird, what with your fluffy hair and that really cute personality you keep hidden from everybody because you want them all to hate you or something, and you actually like reading _Russian__literature_ and _opera_, which no human being in the world truly appreciates but you, but, apart from that... Well, you're a complete freak, but your feelings are fine."

"Hn?" Barnaby had raised a brow. It was a perfect 'better than thou' subtle shift in his expression that could make even Agnes flinch. "You think I'm a freak? How charming."

"Well, you _are_."

"And you're a fully grown man that still wears Mr. Legend socks and watches cartoons."

"Ihihi, well, who doesn't love Mr. Legend?" Kotetsu beamed brightly; smiling just a small child- and when he did that, it was impossible for Barnaby to remain upset or annoyed- completely impossible.

Damn Kotetsu.

That smile should have been illegal.

He had to stop doing that. It was... making his heart melt...

"Honestly, Bunny."

Barnaby started as he felt a light pressure on his shoulder. Kotetsu was touching him.

"Don't look so sad. I might have said something stupid, but... I know how you feel doesn't change _you_as a person. I'd never think you'd try to... attack me, or whatever. You're not like that. I'm just bad with this whole 'love' thing. I guess it's your bad luck you fell for such a useless idiot," Kotetsu's voice was soft and serious; a more adult tone that made Barnaby shiver slightly. It was so rare for Kotetsu to display that side of his character sometimes he forgot it even existed. "Your feelings don't bother me at all, okay? No matter what happens, you're still my partner, and you're still my friend. So... let's act just as normal- at least... until I've figured out how I feel. Okay?"

Barnaby paused, biting down on his lower lip. He could feel his heart beat a little faster in his chest and his face was warm. For perhaps the first time, he felt truly aware he was a lot younger than Kotetsu. Kotetsu was pretty mature, Mr. Legend socks or not. He'd already been married once, and he had a child, and he might have acted clueless, but he knew a lot more about human relationships than Barnaby did.

Kotetsu might have been irresponsible when it came to tidying up his apartment, but he always put his heart into comforting others- 110% _and_more.

That was why he was such a good hero.

That was why Barnaby respected him so much.

It was why...

Face still flushed, Barnaby had muttered- trying to retain his icy, outward persona- "You know... Kaede would think you're cool if she ever heard you talk like that."

"Wow." Kotetsu's eyes widened; a wide, silly smile splitting across his face. "You think?"

"I'm sure."

"And do _you_think I'm cool, Bunny?"

Barnaby glared, folding his arms. "Absolutely not. Don't put words into my mouth I didn't say."

"Sure, sure. I'm sorry~ Sooo..."

"So?"

Kotetsu smiled. "You wanna stay over and watch a movie with me?"

Barnaby wasn't sure how they'd moved from the topic of his hopeless love life (not that it really had a 'life' at all) to movies, but he didn't say anything. In truth, he wanted to spend time with Kotetsu- even if he didn't feel the same about him.

It was preferable to being in his empty, lonely apartment.

And that was how Barnaby had ended up seated on Kotetsu's couch, legs folded underneath him with a squishy pillow hugged tightly to his chest, whilst he watched some... truly _bizarre_ movie about God only knew what with Kotetsu by his side, discussing the pros and cons of the movie's special effects and whether popcorn was better than jell-o.

It was one of the stranger nights of Barnaby's life.

"Look!" Kotetsu suddenly exclaimed, making Barnaby jump slightly.

"What is it, old man? Are you having a mid-life crisis?"

"I might, with a friend like you. No- look, look!" Kotetsu continued, enthusiastically pointing a finger at the TV screen. "Isn't that _awesome_?"

Barnaby stared at the screen in concentration, eyes narrowed. Some woman in a black bikini was... throwing a spear attached to a bowling bowl at a lump of cardboard? And... explosions?

...

Did that even constitute as a _movie_? It seemed more like a group of people dressed up in weird outfits running around a set shouting at each other. It was the perfect definition of chaos; and why did that man in the terrible dragon costume keep doing backflips whilst giggling maniacally to itself?

This was... really, really _stupid._

Of course Kotetsu would love it.

"Awesome? Mm, well, it's inspiring feelings of awe," said Barnaby dryly. "I'm sure if it's a good thing, though- hey!"

Kotetsu had just prodded Barnaby in the side.

"Don't say cruel things about this amazing cinematic masterpiece, Bunny! This was my favorite movie when I was, like, seven! I watched it at the theater three, four... five times!"

Barnaby smirked, flipping strands of his hair behind one shoulder. "Then you're a bigger idiot than I thought."

Kotetsu glowered. "I'm going to make you eat those words, Lil' Bunny!"

"And how do you propose to do that?"

"Like _this_!"

"H-hey, Kotet- mppghhh...!"

But Barnaby couldn't complete his sentence.

Mainly because Kotetsu had just shoved a fistful of popcorn into his open mouth.

As Barnaby spat the kernels out into his cupped hands, a disgusting mix of soggy food and spit pooling against the palms of his hands, he gave Kotetsu a truly venomous death glare. Kotetsu, meanwhile, was laughing; clutching his stomach as though it would tear apart.

"You think wasting food is funny, old man?"

"No- it's the expression on your face! Pfft...! You look so _adorable_!"

"Don't call me that! I really think you should eat this, given it's your food! You're disgusting and you need to be taught a lesson!" Barnaby said hotly, shoving the handful of popcorn and spit (not a good combination) before Kotetsu's face.

"Uh-uh! I'm not eating that! It's been in your mouth!"

"You _put__it_there!"

"Yeah, but I don't wanna to eat your spit, Bunny! I mean, I like you an' all, but that's going too far, even for me! I don't want any indirect kisses!"

"You're such a child! You really believe in that stuff?"

"I believe I don't want to get a disease from eating _that_."

"I-it's not like I have rabies anything!" Scowling, Barnaby fell against the back of the couch, fingers still sticky with a handful of disgusting cardboardy congealing popcorn. "You're so immature. Gosh, I think _my_IQ's beginning to drop just sitting here..."

Kotetsu tilted his head to one side. Then, he began to grin.

"'Gosh'?"

"What's wrong with it...?"

"That's something people say in really old Victorian books, isn't it- with all the 'thee's and 'thou's and stuff! You know, I think those books'd be a hell of a lot better if stuff exploded halfway through; you get sick of all that 'nothing is more deceitful than the appearance of humility' trash."

"You know Austen?"

"I had to read it at school." Kotetsu pulled a face. "I didn't like it very much."

"No... Of course you didn't," said Baranby tiredly. "And 'thee' and 'thou' aren't Victorian, by the way. You're off by a few centuries there. Besides, there's nothing wrong with how I talk; _you're_the uncivilized, uncultured one."

"Ahahaha- 'gosh', that's priceless..." Kotetsu continued to snigger. "Next you'll be going 'Mr. Darcy, Mr. Darcy!' and telling me to fetch the smelling salts!"

As Kotetsu spoke, adopting a truly _awful_British accent that sounded more like Irish and Scottish being put in a blender, with a heavy dose of Japanese layered on top, a loud explosion from the TV played in the background. That weird dragon-bug thing was still laughing maniacally.

Barnaby glared.

"You know, what Kotetsu? You can just shut up."

And, in so saying, Kotetsu soon found himself assaulted by the same handful of popcorn he'd shoved into Barnaby's mouth mere minutes ago.

Revenge was sweet, buttery and heart-attack inducing.

* * *

><p>Kotetsu's proposed movie night ("Ahaha, maybe we can paint our nails and do each other's hair just like in other sleepovers!~" "Shut up or I'll hit you.") had ended up lasting a lot longer than either of them planned. Kotetsu had forced terrible movie after terrible movie upon Barnaby, who'd only managed to survive the immense stupidity by keeping up a deadpan audio commentary inside his head. He should have expected Kotetsu would be a fan of cheesy monster movies from about one hundred years ago, where the audio was all grainy, the special effects laughable and the plots completely nonsensical. As long as things exploded and buildings got destroyed, Kotetsu didn't seem to care about niggling little details like 'believable characters' or 'continuity'.<p>

The movie industry must've loved people like Kotetsu. They'd watch anything.

As the night wore on, breaking into the very early hours of next morning, Barnaby felt himself tire slowly. No longer was he bickering pointlessly with Kotetsu whilst the movie played in the background. Instead, he was struggling to keep his eyes open. It wouldn't look good if he fell asleep before that old man.

Unfortunately, trying to stay awake was a losing battle.

As it always is, Barnaby didn't know exactly when he fell asleep. It was impossible to tell. For Kotetsu, however, he noticed right away- and that was because Barnaby's head fell against his shoulder. The cushion fell from Barnaby's hands and hit the floor with a soft _thwump_.

Kotetsu turned to look at Barnaby's sleeping form, smiling a little to himself. He really did look like a different person when he was asleep- so unguarded, just like a small child.

He'd... been pretty truthful before, though, hadn't he?

When he confessed how he felt, it had been... maybe not entirely unexpected, because Kotetsu had been sure there was a spark of something else there when Barnaby showed his softer side to him; just like how Tomoe had been when she started using his first name; "I-I just thought it was easier than saying your last one! It doesn't mean anything!"

Ha. Barnaby and Tomoe were pretty similar. Kotetsu had been completely helpless with Tomoe, but now he had some experience, maybe he'd be able to not mess things up immensely with Barnaby. Dating Tomoe had been one giant string of disasters after another, a whole comedy of errors, and thinking about some of the things that had happened made Kotetsu wince even now.

It was a miracle she'd ended up marrying him, at all. He was happily oblivious, sometimes unintentionally cruel, and he wasn't an eloquent speaker and he tended to mess up a lot. What had Tomoe had seen in him?

What did _Barnaby_see in him?

And... what did he think about Barnaby?

He was a lot like Tomoe- and Kotetsu had loved Tomoe; he really had, even if he hadn't been all that good at showing it. He could still remember the time he'd try to give her a bouquet of flowers (under Antonio's _excellent_ advice of 'girls love presents!'), and it turned out she'd been allergic to the pollen and keep coughing for a whole day with a runny nose. That had been pretty awkward.

They laughed about it afterwards, though.

But, no matter how similar Barnaby was to Tomoe, he _wasn't_his wife, and though Kotetsu had loved her- he still _did_love her- he wasn't sure how he felt about lil' Bunny. It wasn't because he was male, or anything like that; Kotetsu had been friends with Nathan far too long to find feelings like that 'strange', and plus, society had moved on quite a lot in the past few years. It was because Barnaby was his _partner_, and he cared about him- he cared about him so much- and the thought of hurting Barnaby's feelings or making his miserable because he didn't know what he was doing _hurt_.

Kotetsu didn't want to blunder into a relationship with no idea what he was doing and upset lil' Bunny. No matter how cold or aloof Barnaby acted, he was… a lot more fragile than it appeared.

Kotetsu had to be sure of how he felt before he did anything stupid.

But, still...

Kotetsu's fingers idly threaded in Barnaby's hair- and, even though he teased him over his appearance, Kotetsu couldn't deny he was handsome. Nathan's nickname was well-deserved. No wonder he was so popular with the ladies.

Ha…

If Barnaby's female fans knew about this relationship, they'd probably try and lynch Kotetsu for 'defiling their Barnaby'.

That... was kind of scary.

Kotetsu smiled as Barnaby made a small noise in his sleep, shifting slightly; pressing against the side of his body. Too close, a littttle too close. Barnaby would be mortified he woke up to find himself in such a position.

Poor lil' bunny.

It would have been so much easier if he fell in love with somebody else.

"Hey..." Kotetsu muttered softly, still tugging gently at Barnaby's curls, watching with some interest as they springed back into their near-perfect state when he let go. "You say I'm stupid, but... you're the real idiot. You really like make life complicated for yourself, huh?"

Kotetsu sighed.

The dim light from the TV screen flickered across the room; catching the wedding ring on Kotetsu's finger and making it glow.

_Tomoe...__ If__ you're __still __there, __floating __around__ in __the __ether __or __the __life__stream__ or __something, __then..._

_Please, __tell __me __what __to __do._

* * *

><p>The following day, in the Apollon Media building...<p>

"Wow!~ I just discovered something _incredible_."

"Hn? What is it?"

"This," said Nathan, holding up his shiny new cell phone up for Kotetsu to inspect. His fingers, tipped with long, magenta-pink nails, held the cell tightly. "Come and look, Tiger, dear- don't be bashful!~ This really is _quite_the story!"

Kotetsu grinned. "Is it even more 'amazing' than that article a couple of months ago that said Origami was actually a girl in disguise?"

"Ahh, well... maybe it's not _quite_that imaginative, but it's still pretty interesting. Take a read. Oh, but don't drop it in a tank of goldfish like last time, hon."

"That only happened _once."_

"You are exceptionally clumsy, though, Crusher for Justice~ Just let it be known." Nathan's eyes narrowed. "If you ruin my phone, I'll claw your eyes out. Haha~"

"I've got it. I'll be careful. Geez, I'm not _that_bad."

Laughing, Kotetsu took Nathan's cell from his magenta-pink grip and scanned the screen quickly.

After reading the short, speculative forum post on _HeroWatch_ (a site for fans to discuss their favorite heroes, talk about the things they would do to them if they had them to themselves that were probably illegal, etc, etc), Kotetsu decided he'd had _quite_enough. His face burning light pink, he shoved Nathan's cell back into his friend's hands. Kotetsu very nearly put his eyes in jeopardy, as he almost dropped the cell phone in the process.

To be fair, though, it wasn't his fault he was shaking so much. It was that stupid website.

"M-man, people really have too much free time on their hands, don't they! T-that's pretty funny, really- ahahaha!" Kotetsu said, desperately trying to affect an air of calm.

It wasn't working.

Kotetsu looked about as 'calm' as a gerbil that had been fed a concoction of battery acid and energy drinks, then put on a hamster wheel and zapped with electricity.

In other words, he was trembling.

He was trembling, and he just couldn't stop.

The weird strangled laughter wasn't helping, either.

Nathan smiled, resting a hand on Kotetsu's shoulder. The slight motion was enough to make Kotetsu jump.

"There, there, Tiger," Nathan cooed, a devious smile on his glossy, raspberry-flavored (according to the lipstick he'd put on that morning) lips. "It's fine, really. We've all suspected it for a while- it's only natural the fans would catch on, too. I can't believe you, though; having a heart-felt conversation with Handsome like that in the middle of the street yesterday! Of course somebody would notice!"

"Y-you mean somebody heard us talking?"

"Of course they did. Several 'somebodies', in fact~ There are clips of it on the internet. I imagine that's where this rumor started. Silly Tiger~" Nathan scolded, wagging a finger in Kotetsu's direction. "You should've expected this. Why Barnaby, Sternbild's famous stoic hero, say things like 'I really like you!' in public, it's _obvious_it's going to get around. Gossip _spreads_~ Even better than smooth peanut butter."

"N-ngh..." Kotetsu groaned. "D-damnit... I _hate_the internet. Can't they keep their noses out of my business?"

"Mm, quite~ But, then again, you and Handsome were inviting people to speculate there... You're not very good at being subtle, are you?"

"No. That's never been my strong point," Kotetsu admitted, a small smile quirking on his lips. " Being the 'Crusher of Justice' an' all."

"I'm surprised at Handsome, though, being so open about his feelings. Usually, he acts like he has the emotional capacity of a particularly dense cucumber. I mean, it's understandable, given the poor thing's past, but..." A pout. "I didn't expect him to warm up to you so much, Tiger! He's nowhere near that _sociable_with me! What did you say to him?"

"I don't really, know to be honest. It just sort of... happened. I think he was having a pretty rough day and then he kind of exploded," said Kotetsu. "I'm not really in a position to talk about Bunny's feelings behind his back, though; it's kind of underhanded. And don't let him hear you calling him a 'poor kid'."

"My!" Nathan's eyes widened in surprise. He clapped his hands together in excitement. "You really _are_ acting mature about this, Tiger! I'm surprised at you! What could be the source of this sudden maturity, I wonder? Are you Handsome sharing a newfound bond?"

"A 'bond'...? W-what are you implying, exactly?"

"You know what I'm talking about, you sly old tomcat!~ Did something happen between you two!"

Kotetsu's face flushed. "W-what? U-um, no; nothing, apart from talking about jell-o and watching monster movies, ahahaha! Nothing like 'that' happened at all- n-not what you're implying, anyway! I mean, this _is_ Bunny we're talking about. W-why are you even interested?"

"Well~ I must say, even I'm a little intrigued at the rumors circling round on the web."

"You can't really trust what the fans say, you know... They get a little bit out of control sometimes, I think..."

"That's why they're called 'fanatics' in the first place, Tiger."

"Ahaha, yeah, that's true..."

"So!" Eyes lighting up, Nathan clasped his hands in Kotetsu's, bringing their faces inches apart. "If nothing 'like _that_' happened, what _did_happen?"

"N-nothing, seriously!"

"Aww, c'mon, don't be like that~ We're friends, aren't we?"

Kotetsu ducked under Nathan's almost stifling grip, backing away slowly. The smile on his face looked painted on, awkward.

"Y-yeah, we are friends, true- but Bunny's my friend, too, and I really can't talk about this any further without his knowledge. That'd be pretty low. I really don't want to hurt his feelings like that..."

"Hmn..."

Nathan frowned, deep in thought, as he placed his thumb and forefinger under his chin. Kotetsu really w_as_ being very adult about this- whatever 'this' was. Kotetsu claimed nothing had happened, but... why was he being so defensive over Barnaby? And what about that video recording?

'_I__ really__ like __you, __Kotetsu!_'

To be honest, Nathan was a little jealous at how close Barnaby and Kotetsu were. It just wasn't fair! Why did Handsome talk to Kotetsu so easily, but nobody else?

Aaah well. It didn't _really _matter. Nathan only wanted them to be happy.

It looked like something about their relationship had shifted. That was plain to see.

Maybe Barnaby had confessed his real feelings... and Kotetsu didn't know how to react?

That seemed incredibly likely.

Nathan grinned.

"Ah, alright, alright- I can see when I'm not wanted! You don't want to talk to me? Fine! But..." Nathan smiled. "If you're having trouble with your love life, the best person to discuss matters with would definitely be a smart, mature woman."

"A woman...?"

"Yes! Romance is a delicate situation that definitely requires a young lady's touch."

Kotetsu paused. Then... he smiled.

"I'll keep that in mind. That'll be pretty helpful."

"Helpful?"

"N-not to me, of course! T-to a friend of a friend, obviously- and not one of my friends! But, um, yeah..." Kotetsu tried to mask his embarrassment with laughter, pulling his hat down over his eyes. "T-thanks. Thanks a lot. I'll... I guess I could try that out."

"For your friend?~" Nathan asked innocently.

"F-for my friend of a friend!"

And, face flushed brick red, Kotetsu turned around and walked away.

As Nathan watched his retreating back, a sudden thought struck him, just like a bolt of lightening.

"Oh no! I forgot to tell him that other rumor about us collaborating with that cute new idol girl with the green hair..."

Then, Nathan shrugged.

"Oh well~ I guess this is a lot more important, anyway."

* * *

><p>Lunch time at Asterismus High School was a peaceful affair. Students had pushed their desks together so they could talk with their friends… to the immense irritation of the teachers, who would have to order them to push the desks back into their normal place when the next lesson started. The sky outside the window was light blue, studded with cotton candy white clouds, and beams of sunlight lit up the faces of the cheerful students. It only added to the happy, light-hearted, slice of life kind of atmosphere about the place.<p>

The peace didn't last for long, though.

"Uwahhh! N-no way!"

A very loud shout split the relative silence like a gunshot, making students jump- and one hapless girl very nearly fall out of her chair.

That hapless girl was none other than the adorable Scarf-tan, infamous amongst her classmates for wearing that gift from her boyfriend even in the summer. As such, she had no other name. Not even the teachers knew her by her real title anymore.

"W-what's wrong, Jessica?" Scarf-tan asked in alarm, turning to look at her blonde school friend. "A-are you okay? D-do you want me to take you to the school nurse?"

But Jessica's sickness was not one of the body.

It was one of the _heart_.

Jessica was staring at her cell phone in horror. As her fingers shook, the golden butterfly strap attached to it trembled, as though in flight.

Then, she turned to stare at Scarf-tan sadly with watery eyes.

"T-the really awesome rumor I started about Miku-Miku teaming up with the heroes was _totally_ignored! Look, look!"

And with that, Jessica shoved her cell phone into Scarf-tan's face.

The screen showed a forum post with over 1,000 responses entitled 'Barnaby Brooks Jr. confesses to Wild Tiger? Is Blue Rose's love for the older hero threatened?' There was a link to some video footage, and most of the replies on the forum were filled with cute emoticons and cries of 'squeee!~'

Scarf-tan smiled sympathetically, patting Jessica on the head.

"There, there, it'll be okay. I'm sure you'll post something really famous on the internet one day, too."

Meanwhile, in the same stifling hot classroom, Karina Lyle- who had been roused from her sleep by that loud scream- turned to glare at her two over-eager classmates with half-lidded, sleep-deprived eyes.

"What noisy girls, making such a big deal over nothing..."

Karina was in a worse mood than usual- and she had every right to be. Over the past week she'd been rushed off her feet, to the point where she felt she was physically going to collapse. Trying to juggle hero work alongside school _and_ her part time job as a singer had always been a heavy workload, but now it was getting ridiculous. The constant advertisements, interviews and photo shoots she had to do were draining; not to mention she was now expected to learn and record a handful of songs for her new CD, plus learn the dance steps for upcoming concerts. Add midterm exams into the mix, _and_the fact Agnes had landed her a job as an actress in a new romantic drama as a lovelorn side character, and her life was so impossibly busy it was a wonder she hadn't collapsed under all the strain yet.

Karina was a headstrong girl, though; bold and confident, and able to overcome any obstacle. She'd always been a hard worker. This was _nothing_. If she wanted to be a famous singer _and_a hero, she had to be prepared to struggle. Suffering was fine, if she was doing it for her dreams.

The acting job might have been a little unnecessary- but Karina wanted to do it, all the same. If acting as a character was the only way to express her true feelings about Kotetsu, even if he wouldn't watch the series, then she would do it.

Girls in love really were scary. They could do anything.

Apart from stay awake during school, apparently.

Yawning, Karina rubbed her eyes, trying to stave off another hit of oncoming sleep. She was starting to look a zombie from all her work, with bags forming under her eyes, and her make-up wasn't even able to hide it anymore- but she wouldn't give in!

It was as Karina tried to force some life into her for her evening lessons, slapping her cheeks to get some color back into them, that she noticed it.

The screen of her pink cell phone was glowing.

She had a new text message.

And it was from none other than Kaburagi T. Kotetsu.

She read through it quickly, expecting it to be another stupid joke to cheer her up, or a friendly 'good luck' message about her upcoming exams. It was none of those things, however.

It was...

I-it was...

Karina's eyes widened.

Then, she squealed in excitement.

Meanwhile, her friend, Emily, sighed.

"You're such a hypocrite, Karina. You're just as noisy as they are."

Jane giggled. "Was that a text from your boyfriend?"

"T-there's no such thing!"

* * *

><p><strong>an:** Teehee~ This chapter got to ridiculous lengths (like 15k o_o) so I decided I really should split it up. It's a kind of lazy, slow-paced, slice of life-ish story (even though it's about heroes XD) so it doesn't deserve to have such colossal chapters, people will get bored XD~  
>The movie Kotetsu and Barnaby are watching is totally this one:<br>http : / / cinemassacre . com/2010/10/13/inframan/  
>It's ridiculous &amp; it looks entirely like the sort of thing Kotetsu would love XD<p>

**~renahhchen ****xoxoxoxo**


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